To Light the Shadows on Your Face
by XenaFox
Summary: Instead of meeting Barnaby at the end of the season, Kotetsu instead meets and partners up with him months later. After feeling so depressed during the time he was not working, he returns and decides Barnaby is his new chance. Even as they struggle to get along and Kotetsu continually stumbles into problems every time things start to go right, he finds some hope.
1. A way to make it back someday

The days blurred together. Keeping track of dates and days of the week was often difficult, a ridiculous struggle, but he tried anyway. Kotetsu often felt the time he spent existing was growing more and more pointless, and every single time he paid damage fines or had his daughter hang up on him was proof of that.

Things should have changed months ago, when he nearly fell to his death on the ice and was caught rather ungracefully under the arms in the last second by Sky High. Part of him argued he should have hit the ice, and part of him thought escaping death meant something better was coming, a new horizon, a new chance to take his life where he had wanted it to be so many years ago.

Instead, he woke the morning after with a headache from drinking and found himself without a sponsor thanks to a corporate buyout. Ben, his sponsor turned friend, had tried to reassure him but his smile was a little too forced before he walked away from Kotetsu that morning.

As for Kotetsu, he ended up right back in his apartment to drop into bed. He had a hangover to sleep off after all.

Later that day he had been greeted again with what he thought was a new chance. He was free from work and his daughter was in town for her skating recital. Kotetsu was able to go. He was able to keep his promise, and hug his daughter upon entering the building. He gave her a necklace he had bought on the way over and proudly stood outside the rink as he waited for everything to begin.

Instead, the ceiling crashed down. Kotetsu got his daughter out safely, it was so simple when she was talking to him and he could guide her off the ice as people panicked and rushed by. She turned to him with a confused look as he told her to go on, get out. In the end she listened, and the minute she was out of sight he used his powers to do what he could. He freed a few people who had found themselves trapped, and tried his best to stop the statue.

He got maybe a minute into talking the kid riding the statue before Blue Rose showed up and froze everything around them. With the statue's feet frozen to the floor the scared little boy was easily picked up without causing any more damage. Kotetsu was able to speak to Antonio and Nathan briefly before he knew he had to go outside and show Kaede that he had survived.

She was so happy and angry she nearly knocked him down in a hug, and Kotetsu knew where to go.

A couple of days following, and he found himself in Oriental Town. He was with his daughter, his mother, his brother – he thought for sure that he had finally made a decision that would help him. He needed to relax, be with family, have time to think about things.

What he didn't need was five months of it.

The rate at which he had slipped from okay into not wanting to wake up was terrifying. He found ways to get up, and he wasn't so bad he wanted to end his life, but existing from day to day was a challenge. What good was he? He wasn't a hero. He broke his promise to Tomoe, and when he thought about that he only felt more miserable.

Kotetsu spent a ridiculous amount of time convincing himself no one cared for him. It was completely untrue. His family loved him, and while Kaede called him lazy she did like to walk with him sometimes after school, she liked to watch movies with him and even asked him for help with homework sometimes. And yet Kotetsu couldn't get himself to accept it.

Why should anyone give two shits about him? He was pretty worthless. He sometimes helped his brother at the store, and he helped Anju with the plants, but he was doing nothing. There was no meaning to his life as it was.

When people started to notice, he felt even worse. He would never forget the first time, when it was mid-afternoon and he was still in bed. Kaede had entered his room and he felt her gentle hands in his hair.

"Dad, why aren't you up?"

"I'll be up soon honey," he had told her.

"But you always sleep late. Are you sick, Dad?"

"No." Kotetsu gave her a big fake smile. "Daddy's just lazy, remember?" She always called him that, so he thought she would accept it.

"Sometimes," she said, hesitating. "But can't you be lazy on the couch? You're in here so much. We haven't walked in a week." Her voice was troubled and it sent a dull ache to Kotetsu's stomach. He really was worthless if he could make his daughter feel like that.

"I'll be up soon. Do you want to walk to the market with me?"

She nodded and left, and Kotetsu stayed in bed another twenty minutes before he actually got up and changed clothes.

Anju commented on his behavior a lot. Why did he joke so much less now? He looked tired all the time. He needed to eat more. He aaaallways had a headache.

Eventually Kotetsu did begin to wonder how much more he could take. He had heard of some taking medication, and knew seeing a doctor was an option, but along with scary it was embarrassing. He had been Wild Tiger. How could he end up in some shrink's chair telling him some sob story?

When he woke up on his next birthday, he knew he had to talk to someone even if it wasn't a professional. His mother. He decided he could talk to his mother, and he actually got up early that February morning to tell her. He didn't know how he would word it, but the beginning of another year of his life, well, he wanted to get through it. Even if he hadn't quite hit rock bottom, he was genuinely scared of getting there.

He entered the kitchen, and said good morning to his mother and Kaede. Then his phone rang.

Kotetsu had never bothered changing his cell number. He still did hear from Antonio every now and then, after all. Very few people had his number, so when he opened his phone to see that the number wasn't recognized – actually, it was listed as private – he almost didn't answer. However, he decided that like most things at that point it just didn't matter.

He opened his phone. "Hello?"

It was then that a man named Alexander Lloyds introduced himself to Kotetsu.

"You're going back?" Kaede stared at Kotetsu with wide, surprised eyes. "But I thought you quit that job!"

"I did but it turns out they really want me back. I guess I'm the only one who 'fits' what they're looking for right now." That was partially true. He hated not telling Kaede the truth but, well, he had reasons.

Kotetsu had talked to Mr. Lloyds for a good hour, asking him to repeat things despite all the annoyed sighs he heard on the other end. He had to understand. Kotetsu was beside himself, a sponsor asking Wild Tiger to reappear on the show? Going back to HeroTV?

The catch was he wouldn't be on his own. He had to work with someone. Kotetsu didn't really know who. He kept up with HeroTV every now and then, maybe a couple of episodes a month so he could see how Antonio and Nathan were doing. Watching hurt more than he could ever say, however, so he couldn't force himself to watch or pay much attention at all. He was vaguely aware of a new addition, someone in a suit with bizarre bunny ear type things, and that was it. So who was he going to be with? Was it someone he worked with before, or was someone else being introduced?

Lloyds told him he would tell him…if he was willing to return.

Kotetsu agreed. His heart leapt at the chance. HeroTV had never been able to keep him completely happy but it warded off the depression somewhat. Again, his mind whispered to him that it was yet another new chance. But it wasn't that easy.

"I really do want to go back. Kaede…" Kotetsu sighed as he sat down at the table with his daughter. She was missing school. He wasn't concerned. "You know I love you."

"I know, Dad."

"If you ask me to stay, if you want me to stay…I will." He could not let her down again.

"No, Dad, go."

Kotetsu blinked in surprise. "Huh?"

She laughed at him, lightly. "You always smiled on the phone when we talked. You don't smile anymore. I'll miss you, Dad, but you're unhappy."

"I'm not-I'm not really…"

"Yes you are," Anju said. She'd been standing in the doorway and listening silently, as if the only answer that mattered to her or Kotetu was Kaede's. "You're miserable."

"Hey, Mom, that's not true."

"It's not bad to admit it. Hiding it is though." Anju walked closer to her son.

"Well…I guess it hasn't been as great as it should have been, being home, I mean."

"Kotetsu." Her stern voice had him looking her right in the eye. "This place is painful for you when you have no way to occupy yourself. Tomoe, that lovely girl, she's gone. Kaede knows you love her. But she can't be your form of therapy."

"…" Kotetsu looked down, and at her hands.

"Dad please, I want you to smile again," Kaede said in perhaps the gentlest tone she'd ever used. "I won't hate you."

That alone made things click into place. He sighed, and then offered Kaede a genuine smile. "Okay. I'll go."

And three days later, he found himself at the Apollon Media headquarters, sitting at a desk and negotiating a contract with that Lloyds fellow. He was a serious man, and it made Kotetsu uncomfortable. He wanted to crack jokes and be blunt, and only cracked MORE jokes when he felt uneasy.

"Now, time to discuss your partner," Lloyds said, and Kotetsu finally snapped to attention. He had been taking a guilty little mental nap and missed a chunk of whatever Lloyds had said before.

"Yea, that. What's going on with that?"

"I'll call him in now," Lloyds said, pressing a button and calling a 'Barnaby' into his office.

'That's kind of a silly name' Kotetsu thought before realizing he actually recognized it. The guy with the bunny suit – well not really a bunny suit, but those damn ear-things…"Barnaby…Brooks? The Brooks kid?" he asked.

He got his answer almost immediately. The door opened and Barnaby Brooks Jr. strolled in with some hilarious looking red dress suit and Kotetsu wondered if he'd been waiting right outside the door.

"I'm here, sir," he said, smoothly. His hair was blonde and curly and he looked really rich. He had on a pair of glasses that…okay, those were actually sort of cute….but the rest of him was so primped up and not in the fun Nathan-type-way.

"Ah, good. Barnaby, this will be your partner, Kotetsu T. Kaburagi, also known as Wild Tiger." Lloyds stood from his desk and rested a hand on Kotetsu's back, slightly pushing him forward.

"Nice to meet you, Kaburagi." Barnaby smiled a charming, obviously practiced smile and held out his hand.

Kotetsu wasn't sure he liked him at all. There was something about him that left him incredibly confused, but he couldn't put a finger on what. "Likewise, Brooks."

Lloyds sighed, exasperated. "Kotetsu…"

Fine, he got the hint. Kotetsu put his hand out and took Barnaby's, giving him a firm handshake. The first thing he noticed was Barnaby's hand was soft, not calloused like his own. He was like a baby in the hero world, and immediately Kotetsu felt a small burst of affection for him. Something about his appearance annoyed him, but Kotetsu supposed it was just because everything was happening a little fast. The kid was probably okay.

Finally Kotetsu offered him a real smile, already deciding in his mind that Barnaby was his 'new chance'.

In Kotetsu's head, he was going to take the younger hero under his wing, teach him things, and inspire him as Mr. Legend had so many years ago. He could take him out for drinks and they could be awesome.

Too bad it didn't work anything like that.

The day he met Barnaby was dull. Barnaby barely interacted with him, and talked more about points than anything, but Kotetsu played it up as nerves. It was a strange day, especially as Kotetsu himself was briefed on a new suit he'd be wearing. He wasn't sure he liked it. The thing looked nothing like a tiger, but at least it was green. And it was MUCH better than his old suit. The mechanic was kind of creepy, so Kotetsu really hoped he wouldn't need to have his suit fixed too many times – because he would cause damages.

Kotetsu was eager for a call. SO eager. He wanted to get out there and kick some ass, save some people, give out collectors cards. Some already existed with his new suit pictured on them which was a little strange, but he decided to see it in them having faith in him coming back.

He tried to invite Barnaby out for drinks to get to know him better. Barnaby had politely declined and wandered off.

No big deal. Kotetsu found himself out with Antonio and Nathan, and before long they were all laughing uproariously and using their outside voices much to the annoyance of other patrons at the bar. When they'd all had their fill, they went outside to walk with Kotetsu. He'd needed a new apartment and managed to get one near his old building.

"What brought you back, Kotetsu?" Antonio asked as he stayed close to Kotetsu, who had an arm over his friend's shoulder in an attempt to walk.

He hadn't thought he drank so much… "Lloyds, the Lloyds…called me…" he spit out.

Antonio laughed. "Focus you idiot."

"Mah…my birthday! I woke up an' was all, should talk to mom, the phone rang and I said YUP." He giggled.

Nathan sighed as he walked beside them, a little tipsy but neither he or Antonio were anywhere close to Kotetsu's level. "Honey, we know that you got a call and said yes. Why did you say yes? Did you miss us?" he asked, smirking.

"Eh…"

"Answer him, Kotetsu," Antonio urged.

"Welth, I felt, I felt getting kind of useless at home. Happier here. So…why not? What else is there?"

"Oh, sweetie." Nathan didn't follow that with anything, he just shook his head while Antonio fell quiet as well.

"What?" Kotetsu asked, incredibly puzzled.

"Kotetsu, you're not useless," Antonio said.

Kotetsu felt panic. He didn't want to talk about how he'd been feeling, especially to Antonio and Nathan. What would they think of him? "What's the bunny like?" he blurted to change the subject. When he got no answer he attempted to elaborate. "I…Barnaby. He's my partner."

"Oh!" Nathan giggled, slowing them down as they approached the new building. "Handsome? He's very serious. He arrests for the points and doesn't talk to much of anyone. He smiles out of courtesy. I'm not sure he has much of a life outside of photoshoots and interviews."

"That kind of sounds like a life actually," Kotetsu mumbled. His stomach had started to ache.

"It's not," Nathan said, stopping in front of the stairs to turn and wave a finger at Kotetsu. "What do you do when you leave work Kotetsu? Wait, don't answer that…I guess you never did much either, but at least we could lure you out for drinks. Handsome just vanishes."

Kotetsu shrugged. "So?"

"Geez, you really are drunk." Antonio helped him up his stairs. "Normally you'd scream about trying to invite him out with us."

Kotetsu shrugged again. "Stomach."

"Hurts? I'm not surprised," Nathan tsk tsk'd as they got him inside and on the elevator. He only had one level to go up but stairs weren't a good idea.

"Uggghhhh." Kotetsu had resorted to groaning. His friends had gotten his drunk mind somewhere it didn't want to be and he felt sick to boot.

They didn't try to talk to him any further as they got him down the white empty hallway and into his apartment. A lot of his stuff was boxed up, but he had managed to set up his television and had some movies out, along with a Legend poster above his couch. He missed his apartment with the stairs and the loft…instead he was led around a corner in his living room into a normal hallway this time with dark brown walls.

And then, into his bedroom.

"Need me to stay?" Nathan offered.

Kotetsu contemplated saying yes, because he felt like having something or someone to hug while falling asleep would be great. But Nathan could take it wrong, and Kotetsu wasn't sure he was into that. He shook his head and then thought he would throw up for sure. "No, no, just wanna sleep."

Antonio had left briefly, and returned with a glass of water. He forced it into Kotetsu's hand. "Drink."

"No."

"DRINK IT!"

"Stop yelling at meee!" Kotetsu accepted the water then and chugged it, getting no less than half on his face as the other two sighed.

Nathan insisted on helping him undress, at least down to his underwear, and then he made Kotetsu crawl into bed. Kotetsu shivered until Nathan had the blanket over him, tucking it gently around him. It felt good. Kotetsu knew it was childish to enjoy being tucked in, but he liked it.

"There's a bucket by your bed," Antonio told him. "But hopefully you'll just sleep it off. There's more water on your nightstand. We're outta here."

Kotetsu waved lazily and rolled on his side as they turned out his light and left. The minute he heard the door to his apartment close he felt lonely.

He'd been happy earlier in the evening, but their conversation and his attempted drunk thinking had him in a bit of a bad place.

Everything felt hopeless, and the alcohol only made him feel more emotional. He could find none of that hope he had upon entering Lloyd's office. The only glimmer was when he thought about shaking hands with Barnaby, but he had to be fooling himself. He expected far too much from this, he was placing too much on the partnership. Everything would go to shambles quickly enough.

Why had Tomoe left him?

The thought flashed briefly across his mind. No, it hadn't been her choice, but still she was gone and he was alone at night. He had no one to hold. If he wasn't a hero, if there weren't lives to save he would have no purpose.

Kotetsu closed his eyes tightly to keep from crying. He curled in on himself, feeling like he didn't have a friend in the world despite the fact Nathan and Antonio had been with him for the evening. They could be just humoring him.

His stomach hurt.

The sound of his call bracelet was the only thing that woke Kotetsu the following day. His head pounded, he was overheated, and he tried to shut that horrible sound off like it was an alarm clock, smacking it where it sat next to his bed. Instead of it going off, he got yelled at which woke him up REAL fast.

"Where the hell are you!"

The voice was unfamiliar at first. Kotetsu blinked and answered. "Huh?"

"It's two in the afternoon and now we're being called out! You should have been here hours ago!" Barnaby nearly yelled at him.

"Woah!" Kotetsu sat straight up and looked at the clock. It was late. When had he actually gotten to sleep? It didn't matter, even if he'd been late in the past, it was never that horribly late. "Sorry! I guess I didn't set an alarm."

"Whatever. Look just meet me downtown, there's quite the situation."

"What is it?" Kotetsu asked, standing and looking for a fresh pair of pants. Man, he smelled a little funky too…he checked the bucket. He'd managed not to throw up. So that smell had to be coming just from him in general.

"I don't have time to explain this to you. Just get out here old man, you'll see it right away." Barnaby hung up then and Kotetsu decided it didn't matter, he NEEDED to hop into a very very quick shower.

He arrived downtown half an hour later, following the sound of a crowd yelling and screaming. It was CHAOS. He was blinded by tiny white figures in front of him, swirling around what he was pretty sure was bank. He couldn't make out much though, and ventured closer.

"There you are!" Barnaby suddenly dropped down beside him in his pink and red suit, and even his faceplate looked irritated. "How did you manage to take so long?"

"Showered. I couldn't come here stinking!"

"Are you serious?" Barnaby asked.

"Uh huh. Look, what are those things?" he asked, pointing at the white figures which were paying him no mind, but swarming anyone who got close – though for the moment that was just police officers. Onlookers stayed back.

"Paper cranes."

"Paper…what!" Kotetsu laughed then. "You've got to be kidding me! I don't need a suit for those."

Barnaby sighed. "Yes you...nevermind you fool, you'll find out the hard way." And then he was off into the white mass.

Kotetsu chuckled and activated his powers to just charge through all the paper. Piece of cake!

Except that it felt like hitting a wall.

His powers helped considerably, he could tell, but the paper cranes were no laughing matter. The paper was thicker than he thought and there had to be thousands of the things. They immediately got in his eyes and that hurt, so he squeezed them shut. Closing his eyes and running wasn't a very good idea so he wasn't surprised when he collided very painfully with the side of a building and ended up inside it.

Kotetsu groaned as he opened his eyes and realized he was inside a sandwich shop. He looked at the hole he made in the wall – a couple of torn paper cranes lay on the ground, feebly trying to flap their way back into the air. They weren't alive, but he still felt sort of bad.

His cheeks stung he realized – paper cuts. A lot of paper cuts. No big deal, he could heal them with his power but they still stung. He paused at the hole in the wall wondering if his suit would have been a better idea. And where was Barnaby? How had he not been able to take care of the damn things in his suit?

He got his answer when Barnaby came out of nowhere, being followed by a lot of cranes. And not only was he being followed, they'd wedged themselves into any bit of his suit that they could, every space was crammed with paper. He was using his powers but they flew just as fast and effectively as he could. Barnaby kicked at them, but it didn't do anything.

"You idiot! Tear them!" Kotetsu yelled at him.

"Easier said than done!" Barnaby yelled back at him before jumping back into the fray.

Kotetsu rolled his eyes before shielding them with his eyes and rushed back in after his new, very silly partner. "Wait for the others! Fire Emblem will have this taken care of quickly!"

"What? He'll just set a huge fire! Do you really want fire raining down on the citizens?"

"They'll burn up, they won't turn into falling fire! Whatever, Sky High can just-"

"Fan it and make it worse?"

Kotetsu startled and realized that suddenly, Barnaby was right next to him. He hadn't even seen him, then again all he could see was white when he could peek over his arm.

"Shut up!" Kotetsu snapped. He closed his eyes and starting reaching out at random, grabbing any crane he could catch and ripping it even while they left teeny tiny cuts on his arms and hands. It felt a little wrong to him – as a child he got a lot of paper cranes as gifts. It was normal in Oriental Town, not so much in Stern Bild.

"Stop moving forward," Barnaby said, and Kotetsu froze.

"Huh?"

"It's worse if we try to move forward."

"Maybe for you." Barnaby was having trouble moving in his suit, but he was protected and Kotetsu wasn't. Maybe he should have gotten his suit after all.

He stayed still though and noticed the cranes were a little less interested. It gave him time to think about what to do, which he did silently and by himself instead of trying to discuss anything with his new partner. Fire wouldn't be a great idea. Ice wouldn't do much of anything except make it possibly more dangerous. Kotetsu mentally ran through the heroes, but nothing was ideal for beating paper…except scissors, he thought, and kind of grinned to himself.

But seriously, he had to think of something.

Suddenly a hand grabbed his arm and pulled him forward rather forcefully. Before Kotetsu knew it, someone was carrying him protectively. Opening one eye he could see Barnaby's suit way too close, and he was being carried in the most embarrassing way.

"Why are you carrying me like a princess!"

"I told you to get out of the way. You just stood there and smiled, and I can't have you sick from ice cold water or cut up by more cranes.

"Water?" Kotetsu blinked and chanced a look over Barnaby's shoulder. He was safe. Nothing was following them, in fact soaked globs of paper were raining down. Barnaby's shoulders were wet, likely his back too.

"You're pretty useless, so they called in firetrucks and sprayed the hell out of the cranes."

"Hey…" Kotetsu frowned at Barnaby's word choice.

"We're going to get in there and take care of the guy. I've gathered information, his name is Ted Robinson, he's been making these paper cranes for years and when they didn't grant his wish, he used them as weapons." Barnaby snorted. "Ridiculous."

"Most of our criminals don't make much sense. Get used to it," Kotetsu grumbled and shifted slightly so he could be comfortable at least while being carried toward the bank. Apparently it didn't occur to Barnaby to put him down and let him run, and Kotetsu didn't feel like complaining, free ride and all.

"I thought…nevermind. This is just stupid." Barnaby charged inside the bank and unceremoniously dropped Kotetsu on the ground before going after a short man in jeans and a t-shirt with kanji lettering on it. It looked like it read 'potato wonderful' but Kotetsu was sure when the man bought it he was told it meant something along the lines of 'badass'.

His face was pretty much all beard, and that's all the detail Kotetsu was able to take in before Barnaby clobbered the guy and hauled him into the air with one hand. Quick as that, he was out of the bank and Kotetsu was in an empty building, where he stayed until his powers ran out.

His mind flashed back to Barnaby calling him 'useless' – that stupid brat. Where did he get off calling him that? What a terrible first day in action. He collapsed on a bench in the bank lobby and leaned his head against the wall, noting some stray paper cranes flying lazily near the ceiling. He wondered about the exact nature of the man's power, he probably controlled paper which sounded absolutely lame if one hadn't seen and felt the cranes.

He wondered where Antonio was. If the other heroes had been there Antonio surely would have come in to check on him. Kotetsu knew he was worried about him, even if their communication had been sparse when he was home with Kaede.

He heard footsteps as someone came back in. "Antonio?" he asked, straightening up.

"No."

Kotetsu cringed and looked over to see Barnaby walking back in, his helmet removed. He would look pretty if it weren't for the pissed off look on his face. "Oh. Where are the others?"

"Only we were called out. You and I. They wanted to give us the bulk of the exposure today due to our new partnership. That was a huge waste."

Kotetsu shrugged. "There will be other chances. You done dressing up like a rabbit for the day?"

"…What."

"Your suit. You look like you have bunny ears and when I see you on tv you hop and kick so much. You know what? I don't know why you use your real name, you shouldn't, so I'm going to give you a name. You're Bunny now," he said and started laughing.

"Are you shitting me?"

"Nope!" Kotetsu stood up. "Awww look. I pissed off Bunny. You could be so cute if you didn't have that ugly scowl."

Barnaby's cheeks turned pink. "Do NOT call me that. No, that is not happening."

"Bunny."

"Stop it."

"Little Bunny Barnaby hopping after bad guys, oh what a-"

"STOP!" Barnaby yelled, completely red in the face. "You know what? They wanted me to come in and check on you and bring you out for an interview but I'm just going to say you weren't in here when I came back."

"That's fine."

Barnaby stared at him, as if waiting for him to say something else, or change his mind entirely. But Kotetsu said nothing and Barnaby finally turned away, leaving the bank.

Kotetsu laughed a little more before dropping back down and resting his head against the wall once more. He wished he was as happy as he sounded. Laughter was a good mask.


	2. To watch you, to guide you

Kotetsu was grateful when he found himself in the familiar gym he had gone to often before he went home. He got to see the others, and while he'd already seen Antonio and Nathan the night before, it was nice to get a big hug from Keith and talk to Pao-Lin. It lifted his mood which had taken a serious fall back in that bank.

One face was missing, though. "Where's Ivan?" he'd asked loudly, to be answered by anyone who heard him.

The answer he got was disturbing. Ivan had gone missing months ago. A boy he'd gone to school with had escaped jail and shortly after, Ivan was gone. No one had any doubts that the two were connected after interviews done at the academy. But no one knew where to look anymore either.

That was one thing Kotetsu decided he would attempt to fix. He had to find Ivan, the poor kid was always so shy and hard to reach, and now missing?

Unfortunately there was nothing he could do right away. He got to visit his friends for only about an hour before he received a call telling him he and Barnaby were to meet in front of the building where a limo would be waiting to take them to a photoshoot together. It was a little exciting, Kotetsu had to admit. He felt important.

His partner didn't feel the same way. He glanced up as Kotetsu met him and that was all the greeting he got before they were hurried into the limo. Kotetsu saw across from Barnaby, just looking at him while Barnaby pointedly stared out a window. What could he say? Kotetsu cleared his throat once, Barnaby remained still, and no one attempted to talk.

They only spoke when shoved into a room to get changed for the shoot. Barnaby had this very manly-pink suit and Kotetsu just changed his vest and took off his hat. He was brushing his hair when Barnaby removed his shirt.

Kotetsu's attention was drawn immediately to an ugly scar that covered Barnaby's left side. "What happened?" he asked before he could help himself.

Barnaby blinked at him and then followed his gaze to the scar. "Oh, that. You seriously don't know?" he asked, and then firmly tugged his thin white button-up shirt over himself before grabbing the pink suit jacket.

"No?" Kotetsu had the feeling it was common knowledge to anyone who watched the show.

He was right. "It was all over the news. They couldn't just leave it alone. We were after a crime syndicate, Lunatic showed up, and the fight didn't go so well."

Oh yea, Lunatic…he'd appeared twice and that was all Kotetsu had heard. "So he burned you pretty good, huh?"

Barnaby glared. "Yes. And then he vanished. Now if you'll just get out I can change my pants."

"Oh come on, you don't have anything I don't have."

"Just get out old man," Barnaby said as he continued his glare.

Kotetsu shrugged and left. He had changed plenty of times in front of Antonio and yes, even Nathan, and they had done the same and it was honestly never an issue. But Barnaby kind of had a stick up his ass and probably didn't want Kotetsu to see it. He snickered at that thought and sat down to wait for him.

The shoot was pretty nondescript. They took some pictures of each of them alone, and then a couple of them standing side by side and back to back. When they did the latter, Kotetsu felt Barnaby twitch every single time their backs touched. It was easy enough to get that he didn't like to be touched, which only kind of amused Kotetsu more.

When they were done and folks were filing out, he ruffled Barnaby's hair. "Well Bunny time to change, I'm not even going in so you don't have to worry about me watching you take off your pants."

"What the hell!" Barnaby yelped and Kotetsu kind of noticed there were still some members of the camera crew hanging around and looking at them. Barnaby was holding his hands over the top of his head as if protecting his hair. "Don't call me that…Don't touch my hair! Don't you EVER touch my hair!"

Kotetsu wondered if he'd even noticed the pants comment. "But it's so pretty! It's calling my name," Kotetsu said with a grin.

"Really? I don't hear my…hear my hair frantically calling 'idiot, hey idiot come here!'."

"Heeeey, come on." Kotetsu paused outside the door to the dressing room since he wasn't going in. Barnaby stormed in and before Kotetsu could antagonize him further, the door slammed.

His partner made no sense, Kotetsu decided. They'd fallen into a normal routine, or what was normal for a hero anyway, of barely talking to each other, only really communicating when they were called. Barnaby would smile for the cameras and say Kotetsu was a great partner, but Kotetsu had to be bitched at quite a bit to say anything about Barnaby at all.

Kotetsu tried sometimes. He asked Barnaby how he was doing, he asked him about his sleep schedule, his favorite songs and movies. Barnaby might grunt an answer but often he said nothing. Kotetsu was losing his will to try. He hated that feeling. He wanted to be persistent, wanted to know the stranger he was working with for weeks by then, but most of the time his will dropped and he wondered why he should even bother.

One thing he wasn't was cruel. He sometimes meddled a bit much, or they snapped at each other, or it came down to the silent treatment, but he never picked on Barnaby meanly. He tried to be a little affectionate when he talked to him to see if he could bring Barnaby out of his shell. He still had no luck.

"What's your problem?" he asked Barnaby one rainy afternoon as they settled into their chasers after a long day. Kotetsu had experienced them combined only once and was a little relieved Barnaby loathed that, because then he got a separate bike instead of a belittling sidecar. "You've been pissy ever since we got out of our suits earlier."

"We've been over this. You're foolish, you don't think, you cause damages, and you don't even try for points. And as usual, you covered all those wonderful aspects of yourself today."

"Saving lives is more important." Kotetsu was really tired of the points thing. He got that they needed them to keep their ranking and keep sponsors, a tiring requirement of being a hero.

"You are way too old fashioned." Barnaby sighed and crossed his arms, surprising as Kotetsu thought he would take off on his chaser right away, both to get away from him and the rain even if it wasn't coming down very hard. "I don't want anyone to die. I want to save people, but you're ridiculous about it."

An actual conversation? Were they have an actual conversation? "Eh? How so?"

"You didn't need to smash that window back there just to help that girl. If you'd just helped me and gotten that creep off the side of the building, she would have been safe without you barging in there and carrying her out – not to mention she wouldn't have been screaming in fear while you casually dropped a few stories before shooting your wire."

He had a point and it pissed Kotetsu off. But Barnaby was talking and he wasn't going to let that go to waste. "Well…sure. But thinking about these things in the moment, I have to go with my instinct-"

"Which isn't always right," Barnaby said with another sigh and leaned back on his chaser as if inviting the rain to come down and soak him. Kotetsu wanted to go over there and keep him dry so he wouldn't catch a cold. "You just don't get it."

"I do too. Listen, I used to be more careful, but once someone dies in front of you? You don't know what that's like."

It was then that Barnaby fixed him with a cold stare, one that told Kotetsu he'd gone somewhere he shouldn't have. There was a long awkward pause before Barnaby spoke. "You would assume that, wouldn't you?"

"Well…I guess I shouldn't." To be fair Barnaby had started during his absence, he didn't know if he arrived at a scene just in time to see someone killed, or if he tried and failed to save a citizen from death. "But I've seen so much." His mind flashed to his late wife and his chest tightened. There had been nothing he could do there and he hated that feeling of being powerless. He couldn't stop a disease, his Hundred Power was completely useless.

"You don't know anything about me. Don't try to teach me anything," he growled and started up his chaser.

"Look, I'm just trying to talk to you!" Kotetsu finally blurted, not starting his engine yet.

"Well wasn't that a mistake," Barnaby said with such malice in his words that Kotetsu fell silent and simply watched him go.

He tossed and turned that night, having downed some beer and gone to bed early. He didn't feel well and hadn't drank enough to be drunk although he'd been tempted to try. Getting drunk had not been helping him. It only made him pass out anymore and then he woke up with his head hurting. He did not have the kind of job where he could easily sleep it off.

It was eleven at night when he sat up in his bed. He'd made a decision which would probably backfire, but he felt terrible for the conversation earlier that day. He didn't know a thing. Barnaby had every right to be mad at an idiot like him.

A short search found him his phone in his living room, somehow jammed into the couch. The battery was low, but he could easily make a call. Kotetsu called Barnaby, hoping he would answer. He kept it to voice only, because he was sure he looked terrible.

"Hello? Old man?" came a tired sounded voice.

Kotetsu swallowed. He hadn't planned out how to start. "Bunny."

"I've asked you over and over not to call me that."

"Bunny I'm sorry about earlier."

"What?"

Kotetsu wanted to cry and he didn't know why. "I shouldn't have just assumed that about you. I just thought since you're new and young and all you probably haven't been called to anything too serious." It made no sense for him to think that. He'd been called to some pretty disturbing scenes when he was still new.

"Okay…"

"I'm sorry you had to see someone die. It's terrible. No one should have to go through that." He was rambling. Maybe he'd had a bit much beer after all.

"Is this all you called about?" Barnaby said, though he sounded more concerned than annoyed. It was almost touching.

"I guess so. But listen Bunny if you ever need to talk about it for some reason, I know what it's like. So just talk to me, okay?" he said and moved his head briefly to sniff. He didn't need Barnaby to hear any hints he was holding off crying.

"No, you don't know," Barnaby said quietly.

Kotetsu just smiled on his end. He used to feel that way too, like no one could possibly understand the guilt and sadness after failing a rescue. An older hero, a man called Gunpowder, took him aside and talked some sense into him after the second time it happened. It had helped a lot, and maybe if Barnaby just had someone to tell him that... "I have an idea, anyway. You can talk to me about other things too."

There was silence on the other end, and after a minute Kotetsu thought he hung up.

"Bunny?"

"You called me this late at night for this?" came the sharp, irritated reply.

"You're right. It's late. I just wanted to tell you it's okay."

"You should go to bed so you're not late tomorrow."

"I will. I'm pretty tired."

"Uh-huh. If that's all, I'm hanging up. Never call me this late ever again."

"Sure. Bye, Bunny," Kotetsu said and hung up. He felt a lot better than he had hours ago when he opened his first beer. Maybe Barnaby wouldn't talk to him, but he still tried. It was one less thing to beat himself up over.

Kotetsu made his way back to his room and plugged his phone in to charge. He flopped on his bed with a sigh, staring at the ceiling. He really hoped that call would change things somehow.

"He saw his parents murdered."

"…Oh." Kotetsu stared back at Nathan, trying to relax in his seat at the bar. His day with Barnaby had not gone so well. The younger man didn't scold and insult him, instead he didn't talk at all. The silent treatment was worse than Kotetsu thought it could be even if they had many other days that were similar.

Nathan had invited him out upon noticing how bothered Kotetsu was by it, and so he went, telling him about some of his conversation with Barnaby the day before. He left out telling Barnaby he could talk to him.

"He doesn't speak about it, but since he's famous a lot of details about him have been dug up. Handsome wants revenge I believe, but I don't know if he's gotten any closer to what he wants to find…" Nathan tapped his fingers on the table. "He won't talk to any of us, and when anyone in the media starts to dig too deep, Maverick tends to conveniently show up and stop it."

"Huh. He has a special interest in this kid?"

"Well, from what I can gather he'd been raising Barnaby." Nathan made a face. "Some of that is a little unclear though."

"They really don't want anyone to know about his life before this, huh?"

Nathan nodded. "It's hard to talk to anyone at the academy about him as well. I haven't tried myself, I don't do that sort of thing," he said with a wave of his hand.

Kotetsu chuckled and sipped at his drink, which was surprisingly weak on the alcohol. He didn't have it in him to complain to the barkeeper. "Yea, interrogating people was never your thing." Unless of course, he wanted to know about their dating lives…

"No, even if it does buy me some one on one time with some real lookers." He sighed wistfully and focused his gaze on Kotetsu. "Are you worried about him?"

"Who?"

"…You're hopeless. Handsome, Barnaby, the person we've been talking about."

"Oh." When asked directly, Kotetsu was surprised to realize he actually was concerned for his partner, even more so upon learning about his parents. "I guess I am."

"You just realizing you actually care about him at least a little?"

Kotetsu nodded with a small smile on his face. "Yea yea, I know, we've been working together for a while, and only now…" He sighed. "Not that it does any good. He hates me."

"Have you given him a reason to like you?" Nathan asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Do you really think that would help?" After all, hadn't the others tried to be nice to him?

"…Good point. Still, you should try that instead of your usual plan of pissing him off and paying damage fines."

Kotetsu just laughed.

Approaching Barnaby was a difficult task. Kotetsu went over it in his head over and over, how would he even try to communicate with him? He had to get him somewhere when they weren't being called out, otherwise the rabbit escaped.

As luck had it, one afternoon Kotetsu found that he and Barnaby were alone in the office. Kotetsu was playing solitaire on the computer instead of doing paperwork, and Barnaby appeared to be working, something he usually did at home.

Kotetsu looked at him, thinking. It was the perfect time to talk to him. He just had to muster up the willpower.

"Are you going to stare at me all afternoon?" Barnaby asked and Kotetsu jumped.

"I wasn't staring!" Kotetsu said, flailing a little as he tried to defend himself and not fall backwards in his chair.

Barnaby just ignored him, clicking away at some boring looking things on his computer.

"Hey, Bunny-"

"That's not my name."

"I finally learned about your parents. Have you been alone all this time?" he finally asked.

Barnaby froze, and slowly looked at him. "Huh?"

"I'm just curious. You don't hang out with anyone, no one sees you with friends, and then I find out about your parents…you know, you should do something social."

"And what the hell would that do?" Barnaby asked, his cheeks slightly pink. Kotetsu wondered if it meant he was getting pissed off.

"It's a lot less lonely."

"What do you know about being lonely?"

Kotetsu opened his mouth to answer, but nothing came out. This was quickly going where he didn't want it to. There was no way he was even going to start telling Barnaby about the soul-crushing loneliness he felt much of the time. No, no one needed to know that. "I just know stuff, okay?"

"Helpful." Barnaby turned back to his computer.

"Hey come on. Why won't you let me talk to you?"

"We're partners, we don't have to be friends."

That hurt more than Kotetsu wanted to admit. He couldn't say whether or not Barnaby's words were really that personal – he likely felt that way about everyone. But it made him wonder how Barnaby saw him. He probably saw him as an insect that refused to stop buzzing around his ear and not worth his time.

"That doesn't mean we can't talk."

"Don't you have work to do?" Barnaby asked, clearly annoyed as he looked at Kotetsu again.

Kotetsu looked at his own screen. Solitaire was of course still up. He didn't even try to hide his slacking. "It's important to keep my mind sharp!" he said defensively.

"Looks to me like you're losing. How do you lose at solitaire?"

"You…" Kotetsu looked back at him, quickly. He was glad he did because there was a trace of a smile there, a little one that vanished almost immediately. Kotetsu was sure his mind wasn't making it up. "Shut up."

"You're the one that wanted me to talk. Or did you forget? Old men have bad memories."

Kotetsu had to fight the urge to get up and go over there to give Barnaby a hell of a noogie as revenge. If he did that, his progress would be undone and he'd probably get a limb broken. "Then don't shut up!"

"Indecisive," Barnaby remarked, but he said no more and returned his attention to his computer.

As much as he was sure he pissed Barnaby off, Kotetsu felt they worked together a lot better the following day. Barnaby actually spoke to him, and while Kotetsu still broke things and pissed people off, they were able to coordinate and be more effective. It was a good feeling, knowing that his partner was finally trying to work with him more. Kotetsu couldn't help but think that in time words wouldn't even be necessary. They often each had matching ideas, even if executed a little differently when Kotetsu was allowed more freedom.

He kind of hoped that never happened because working was the only time they got to speak. It didn't exactly help them get closer, as it was never discussions about anything personal at all. But it was better than nothing.

Kotetsu couldn't believe his luck when Barnaby said more than two words to him one evening in the Apollon transport. They weren't going to, or even coming from a call. Saito had some work he wanted to do with their suits and the device used to put them on. Kotetsu didn't really know what to expect but he was told not to worry, they had numbing spray on hand.

He wasn't too sure what to think about that.

"This is so annoying," Barnaby muttered from his seat. He was in his undersuit, legs crossed and hands resting on either side of him.

"You're telling me." Kotetsu was pacing. He was in his normal clothes, trying to put off changing until the last minute. "We don't have any calls, we should be out right now!" Kotetsu sighed. He didn't have anything to actually do, but he didn't want to be there anyway.

"I had so much to get to tonight."

Kotetsu glanced at his partner. "Aren't you caught up on paperwork?"

"Yes…" Barnaby's hands clenched he noticed, as if he were really struggling with something.

Kotetsu sat down across from him. "Then what is it you need to do? If time is an issue I'll lend you a hand," he offered.

"You can't do anything." An awkward silence hung over them for a minute, and then Barnaby spoke again, looking down. "I'm trying to research Ouroboros."

"Ourowhatos?"

"Ouroboros. The crime syndicate that is behind my parents'murder."

"That's right," Kotetsu nodded. "You saw it happen, so you saw the murderer."

Barnaby made a face. "I saw, but I can't remember. No matter how hard I try, all I see is the figure with the gun, and the Ouroboros tattoo on the back of his hand."

"Oh…" Kotetsu shrugged. "I didn't know such a group existed."

"I had to do quite a bit of searching just to discover the origins of the tattoo. You certainly wouldn't have heard of them."

Kotetsu frowned. "Hey now, I've come across quite a few different criminal organizations as part of this job. I don't have to do research to find out half of these assholes exist."

Barnaby didn't say anything in response to that. "Anyway, I think I'm getting close. I remember bits and pieces as I look at photos and read bios on certain members. Then, I can have vengeance. I want to kill him," he ended, an angry look on his face.

"Bunny…" Kotetsu stood back up and approach Barnaby. He put a hand on his shoulder. "You don't want to do that."

"Yes, I do."

"No you don't."

"How the hell would you know what I want!" Barnaby snapped, grabbing Kotetsu's hand and pushing it away. "I know you've seen someone die before too, and I know you didn't just mean someone you saw on a call. Wouldn't you want to hurt whoever did that to them?"

"I-" Kotetsu didn't know how to respond. He couldn't really go after a fatal disease. And it did not feel like the right time to tell Barnaby it was his beloved wife who has passed away. But there was no getting out of it either. "There's no one to hurt, what I mean is…is…"

Barnaby's expression changed to surprised confusion and before they could get any further, Kotetsu's phone rang.

He answered it quickly, probably too quickly. "Hello?"

"Tiger! Are you busy? It doesn't matter. I have something to show you!" It was Karina, sounding frantic.

"I'm just waiting around, what is it? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine we're just- yes I am showing him – this is weird."

Kotetsu could tell she was talking to someone else. "What's going on?"

"Sssshhh! Oh, not you Tiger…" Nathan could be heard being offended on the other end. "I'm sending you a picture," she said and Kotetsu made a face.

"Of what? If this is one of Nathan's jokes…"

"No! Here!"

Kotetsu heard a beep on his phone and took it away from his ear to open the picture.

It was a photo, taken on one of the streets in Stern Bild. He wasn't sure which one right away. It was rather nondescript, with citizens, a man, a mother and child, a girl with a scarf, some others, walking in front of a newsstand. It took him a moment to see what was noteworthy about the picture.

Then he found it: Next to the newsstand, difficult to see behind a large man in a ridiculous tux, was Ivan.

see behind a large man in a ridiculous tux, was Ivan.


	3. Through the darkest of your days

Searching was tough when they only had a photo to go on- one that was outdated pretty much right after it was taken. Of course upon locating the street there was no sign of Ivan. It frustrated Kotetsu more than he wanted to admit. He didn't have the energy to look for Ivan, yet he wanted to find him badly. He hoped like hell he wasn't hurt.

But all he could do was wait. Kotetsu didn't really like doing research, and focusing on evidence, theories of any sort regarding their missing friend was near impossible for him. Once or twice he considered asking Barnaby to help out since he seemed adept at digging up information. But Ivan was not Barnaby's friend. He wondered if they'd ever met.

Barnaby wouldn't do it anyway, not for Kotetsu and if not for him, certainly not for Ivan.

As easily annoyed and antisocial as he was however, they're working relationship continued to improve. They still bickered over points and methods, but Kotetsu began to find it natural to fight at Barnaby's side. He didn't want to tell him that for fear of Barnaby taking it weirdly. It was nice though, and he could feel his affection for Barnaby growing.

At the same time he found himself becoming a little distant from the other Heroes.

Kotetsu hadn't gone out for a drink in a few weeks. That didn't mean he was sober – he started bringing home his beer and liquor. His new apartment began to look like his older one, the floor littered with bottles. He told himself every day that he'd clean them up, but at the end of each day he was too tired and too drained and it didn't matter that much if his apartment was clean, because no one except him went in it anymore.

It wasn't for lack of trying on their part. Nathan called, Antonio called, even Kotetsu's old sponsor, Ben, tried to contact him once in a while. He answered most of Ben's calls for a time.

When his phone rang one warm evening he almost didn't answer.

He looked at the ID and his eyes went wide when he saw it was Barnaby calling.

"Bunnyyyy!" Kotetsu said with a big smile as he answered, a little disappointed to see it was voice only, and probably staying that way.

"Ah, Kotetsu…you're awake."

"I sure am!" He glanced at the clock and did a double-take. It was a little after midnight, where had the time gone? He had been primarily watching TV that night, but he hadn't thought he'd zoned out at it quite that long.

"…Are you drunk?"

Kotetsu looked at the cans under his feet. Two beers was all he'd put down, and he didn't feel drunk. "No…should I be?"

He was answered with an exasperated sigh from Barnaby, who took his sweet time saying anything else. Kotetsu waited it out, because he had sort of become used to odd silences Barnaby had over the phone, even on calls sometimes. His mind was clearly somewhere else half the time.

"I need to know if you would be willing to come to my apartment."

"When!" Kotetsu asked. An invitation? To Barnaby's apartment!

"Right now?"

"Oh…" That was difficult. Kotetsu didn't feel that tired but that could change pretty soon.

"Right. Sorry. I thought it was worth asking at least. I'll let you go to bed."

"No, no! It's…what do you need so late?"

"I'll tell you when you're here," Barnaby said quietly.

"Why did you call me?" Kotetsu blurted, curious as hell.

"Maverick isn't awake."

Kotetsu nodded before remembering that Barnaby couldn't see that. "Right, right." It saddened him to realize it, yet again – Barnaby had no one except his guardian and his partner because he actively avoided getting to know anyone. So if he was in trouble, there were only two people he could rely on. "I'll be over there as fast as possible," he assured Barnaby.

Taking his car wasn't a good idea, Kotetsu realized, but he was already driving when he thought about it. The darkness outside and what was almost a soothing ride in the city of all places combined with the late hour actually was lulling him to sleep. The beers probably hadn't helped.

He made it just fine however and found parking close to the address he was given. Finding the right building took him a few minutes and Barnaby had to buzz him into the building. Riding the elevator to his apartment Kotetsu almost felt giddy. He knew that he wasn't being invited over for fun. And Barnaby only called him as a last resort. But none of that mattered because he was excited to finally visit his partner's home. And judging by how long the elevator ride was taking, his partner apparently lived somewhere in the sky.

Barnaby was actually waiting for him in his doorway, which Koetsu found a little odd at first. Upon studying him a little more Kotetsu realized the familiar signs of anxiety. "I'm here Bunny!"

"Wonderful," Barnaby said flatly, but Kotetsu wasn't discouraged right away. "Come in," he said and turned to lead Kotetsu inside.

The first thing Kotetsu noticed was how damn empty the place was. "Wow Bunny, nice to see you don't use any of that obnoxious stuff we call furniture."

"Look, if you're going to crack jokes-"

"Sorry, sorry. What did you need?" Kotetsu asked. The mood had become very serious and he wasn't sure if that was just from Barnaby himself or from the room.

"I found the man who killed my parents."

Kotetsu blinked and stared at him. "You…did?"

Barnaby nodded and then motioned for Kotetsu to join him by his computer. Barnaby sat in his chair and Kotetsu had to stand alongside him. Barnaby had brought up a picture of a man named Jake Martinez and he looked kind of like a criminal who had once been an entertainer for bachelorette parties. "Him."

"Jake Martinez?"

"Yes, I saw his face as I was reading through some alarming news and I just knew. It suddenly fit, it's him. That's the face that is in my memory," he said softly.

"You're sure?"

Barnaby glared at him.

"Okay okay…Bunny I'm happy you found him, but why did you have to tell me this right now?"

"Ah…" Barnaby's eyes darted between Kotetsu and the computer screen. "I just wanted someone to know…I knew I couldn't sleep unless I said something about it."

"You don't usually tell anyone anything."

"This is different. And it was tell you or Maverick. I do not wish to disturb Maverick and really I didn't want to wake you up either but of the two of you there was a better chance you'd be awake." Barnaby focused his eyes on Kotetsu with a suspicious look. "Why were you up so late anyway?"

"Just watching a show." That was true.

"I…see."

"Was there something else?" Kotetsu had a gut feeling that there was more to what Barnaby had found.

"Well, Jake didn't escape alone. He took another prisoner with him. And they both received help in breaking out, from a girl identified as Kriem and a boy who…well, look."

Barnaby switched to what looked like a report about the incident, and recognized a blurry photo and description fairly quickly. "Ivan? What on earth?"

"I thought so. What kind of power does he even have?"

"Um…" Kotetsu scratched his head.

Barnaby narrowed his eyes and sighed. "Of course. You don't even know your own co-worker's ability."

"It's not like he ever uses it. He just photo bombs people."

"I suppose. Anyway, this happened three days ago. It's not on the news and I had a hard time finding out anything about this. Someone's doing a good job of covering it up instead of letting us know. Why? They must be very dangerous."

"I don't know…" Kotetsu genuinely had started to feel tired. "Politicians and the like always hide things Bunny."

"But something like this!" Barnaby nearly shouted, making Kotetsu jump. "This is so messed up! Going after them is going to be hard because how can we tell them how we know about this?"

"Wait a second, 'we'?"

"Ah…" Barnaby turned away looking slightly ashamed. "You didn't do any of this, I just assumed for Ivan…I would rather kill the murderer myself anyway, this is my mission."

"No, no! I was um, making sure heard right." Hearing Barnaby refer to them as 'we' in that situation made Kotetsu nearly break into a smile.

"Oh."

They fell silent until Kotetsu broke it with a yawn. "Bunny I'm exhausted…can I crash here?"

"Here!" Barnaby gave him a look as though he'd been violated.

"I don't want to fall asleep driving, and I really don't want to sleep in my car," Kotetsu explained with a frown. "I'll just crash in the chair, okay?"

"I…I was the one who asked that you come over. So yes I suppose I should let you stay. But listen old man, you touch ANY of my stuff and-"

"Yea yea you'll break my fingers or pop my car tires." Kotetsu waved away the rest of whatever Barnaby wanted to say. "I really do just want to sleep."

Barnaby hesitated, but finally nodded. "Fine."

The chair wasn't the most comfortable place to sleep. Kotetsu didn't have his night clothes, he didn't even have his comfy pants for lounging around in his apartment at night because he changed when he left for Barnaby's. He managed to get Barnaby to give him a blanket and a pillow so he wasn't all uncomfortable. And once Barnaby left the room Kotetsu had taken off his pants to sleep in his boxers and shirt.

Being in Barnaby's apartment was strange. He was glad to be there but it was so empty. At home he could fall asleep to many things – his radio, his television, a book, or just staring at something like a poster. Barnaby's left nothing to occupy his mind and he could only think about his partner so much until it started to feel a little strange.

Barnaby had trusted him enough to tell him what he found. Sure, part of it was because Barnaby was having trouble handling it himself, but he still trusted him, let him into his living room at least. And that brought so much peace to Kotetsu. He couldn't be all that useless if Barnaby would tell him that, right?

But then…he only told him because Maverick wasn't available. Kotetsu felt his stomach tighten, the dull ache he got when he felt sad staring to manifest.

He felt awful for not seeing Nathan and Antonio more. They had tried to get him out, and they actually did want him around. But they could easily just be doing it for old time's sake, or worse, out of pity since he was such a loser compared to everyone else on HeroTV. Kotetsu may not be in last place, and his cards and merchandise were selling better, but that was only because of Barnaby.

That was the hero side, anyway. When he was just him, just Kotetsu, he had nothing to offer and there was no reason anyone should even like him.

He had curled into a ball when a loud scream seemed to rip across the apartment.

Kotetsu was up in an instant, wide awake. That had to have come from – yes another scream though not quite as loud – it came from Barnaby's bedroom.

He would likely be pissed at Kotetsu for going in but that didn't matter. A scream, someone in danger, Kotetsu HAD to help them.

He was relieved to find that while Barnaby's door was closed it wasn't locked. His room was dark though and Kotetsu's eyes had to adjust. He momentarily thought about using the light from his phone but his pants were still in the other room.

There was no attacker, no crime to be seen. There was Barnaby sitting straight up in his bed with his arms crossed over himself and visibly shaking. He was saying something to himself though Kotetsu couldn't make out the words.

"Hey, hey Bunny."

Barnaby paused, looked up at him, and then bowed his head down and drew his knees to his chest as if he was trying to hide himself.

Kotetsu had no idea how to deal with it. He guessed it was a nightmare, or panic attack or both. He slowly approached Barnaby and stubbed his foot on the base of a nightstand. Kotetsu paused, holding back a swear, and reached around the nightstand, fumbling for a light of some kind. He hoped there was a lamp anyway. Barnaby's nightstand wasn't cluttered and Kotetsu worried he would find nothing but he was rewarded when he found a very small bedside lamp. He flicked it on and Barnaby didn't move, staying where he was. His shirt was off and his body covered in sweat, at least what Kotetsu could see of it. His legs were still under a black blanket.

"Um…" Kotetsu didn't know what to do. He touched Barnaby's back timidly, and then laid his whole hand on it. Barnaby didn't freak out further or jump away or ask him what the hell he thought he was doing.

Kotetsu sat on the edge of the bed and slowly, carefully rubbed Barnaby's back. "It's okay. It's okay," he said although he had no idea if it was okay.

"What happened?' Barnaby whispered and Kotetsu barely heard it.

"Nightmare," he replied even if he wasn't sure. He gently ran is fingers down Barnaby's arm and was rewarded as he felt him relax, even if only slightly.

"That's right, Jake, Jake he was there again, he shot Mom and Dad, he saw me, there was fire and…" Barnaby turned his head toward Kotetsu. He looked so odd without his glasses on when he wasn't in his suit. "Did I scream?"

"Twice."

Barnaby's face turned red, and his eyes followed Kotetsu's hand as it came to rest on the blanket. "Fuck…"

"Hey, screaming happens."

Barnaby shot him a look that told Kotetsu what he'd just said was pretty dumb, but Kotetsu just grinned back at him.

More than anything Kotetsu wanted to put his arm around Barnaby's shoulders and comfort him, tell him it was all okay. He didn't like seeing him so embarrassed and scared. "Do you need anything?"

"…No."

"Okay…"

"Get off my bed. You're not wearing any pants."

Kotetsu chuckled at that but did as asked, standing up but still worried for his partner. "Are you sure?"

"Well…you can do one thing."

"Yes?"

"Don't. Tell. ANYONE. About this." Barnaby sighed and finally picked his head up and straightened his legs back out. He looked so tired, and his cheeks were wet which was alarming.

Kotetsu thought better of asking him about crying. "Of course not," he answered instead. Why would he? It was not the type of thing to go around telling anyone.

"Thanks, old man."

"You got it, Bunny."

"…Now get out. Turn off that light first."

Kotetsu laughed again. "As you wish," he said as he flicked off the light.

Barnaby did not mention the nightmare again. He didn't even let Kotetsu stick around when they woke up, not that he had an excuse to anyway. Kotetsu had to go home and get a change of clothes at least before going to the gym and doing the obnoxious publicity crap that came with being a teammate of Barnaby's.

They had two interviews that day, and Kotetsu had no doubt it would be the normal routine – Barnaby got asked most of the questions while Kotetsu was slowly edged out of view of the camera, and sometimes the audience. He understood it since Barnaby was such a gorgeous young man who was good at what he did, but it didn't help him feel better.

That's why he was almost, ALMOST happy when a special news report broke, news finally being released about the escape of Jake Martinez. A bridge had been destroyed and thus it was no longer a secret. Kotetsu still wanted to know who tried to keep it all from the public eye, but it didn't matter. Chaos had erupted and it was time for some serious hero business, a break from catching thieves.

Jake was threatening the public with things in suits that looked like sharks. He was going to knock out the supports of Stern Bild, which would have the city crashing to the ground. Destruction and death.

All because Jake didn't like normal people.

Kotetsu could sort of understand the feelings behind that. As a child he hated being a NEXT, because he was picked on quite badly. He never knew why – as far as NEXT powers he didn't really have anything 'freaky'. Hundred Power was a power type ability, not something scary that could mess with ones thoughts and perception, not one that could literally sniff out certain aspects of someone to use against them – the list went on. Regardless, he was picked on and when the bullies weren't around he was exposed to some viscous NEXT-haters via the media.

He cried all the time. His mother had to tell him constantly that he was a person like everyone else – yes, he had his powers, but he still had a heart like everyone else, still had a brain, he was still human with emotions and personality. There was no reason to feel ashamed. He didn't understand that until the day he met Legend at the bank, the day he was told his powers were good.

Maybe Jake should have met Legend or someone like him. That one day had certainly changed Kotetsu's life, although meeting those who supported him along the way helped – Tomoe had no abilities, but she had loved him so much, and told him always to be a hero. He missed her.

The exosuits that destroyed the bridge had gone still and Jake threatened the safety of the city if anyone went near the damn things. Kotetsu didn't know what powers Jake had, but they'd been enough to keep him in social isolation for years, far away from anyone and anything he could use.

The fact that Jake kept referring to someone with him named 'Night Terror' was pretty worrisome too.

"I'll kill him!""

Kotetsu was distracted from his place with the other Heroes, standing in the training center and trying to figure out what to do. He hadn't seen Barnaby since he left his apartment.

"Hey Bunny!" he said as his partner charged into the room. He looked like he was about to freak out, eyes wide and wild and breathing hard.

Barnaby gave him an icy glare and Kotetsu realized his greeting maybe wasn't the best choice of words. "What the hell do you want, old man? Use your little nickname on me? Have you NO respect?"

"Handsome, calm down!" Nathan stepped forward and put a hand on Barnaby's arm.

"Yes Han…Barnaby! Please calm down, we will figure this out!" Keith said, looking the most alarmed out of all of them.

Barnaby shrugged Nathan off and kept his eyes on Kotetsu. "I'm going to kill him. I told you this, I am going to kill him."

The tone of voice he used, his eyes…Kotetsu found it chilling. "No, Bunny, you can't. You-"

"The points!" Keith exclaimed, holding up a finger as if he'd found out exactly what the problem was.

"No, no not the points. Barnaby we talked about this, taking a life-"

"Is something you don't need to worry about. This is MY fight." Barnaby growled at him, He stomped right up to Kotetsu, stopping with his face inches away from him. His eyes held an intense look Kotetsu struggled to read. It was no longer that glare, and somehow it wasn't quite anger.

"Bunny…"

"Excuse me, but we're all involved here." Everyone turned to Karina, who looked pretty pissed off. "Or do you think it's all about you, Barnaby?"

"He killed my parents!"

"And he's about to kill the civilians of the city we all protect!" she countered. "This is not just your problem!"

Kotetsu started to add in Ivan, but remembered the others didn't know that yet. He wondered if he should tell them but like everyone else he didn't dare break the heavy silence that descended between Barnaby and Karina's quarreling.

"…I understand," Barnaby said, though he sounded angry still. "I need to go. I can't be here." He started walking off, just as quickly as he had stormed in.

"Wait, Bunny where are you going?" Kotetsu called after him, deciding a split second later just to follow him.

Barnaby didn't speak, nor did he stop him. So Kotetsu simply followed him to one of the outdoor balconies the building had. It was warm out, nice, too nice for the city to be threatened.

"If you're looking for a thank you for last night…then thank you." Barnaby turned and leaned against the ledge, his gaze finding Kotetsu again.

"I- Okay." He didn't expect that. Barnaby had already thanked him anyway.

"Satisfied?"

"No." Kotetsu walked over to stand beside him. "Bunny I don't want you to kill him." Barnaby opened his mouth but Kotetsu held up a hand to silence him. "I know you want revenge. But what will it do? You can't bring your parents back and you can't turn back time. You will just have a man's life on your hands. It's not a good feeling."

Barnaby gave him an alarmed look. "What? Have you…"

"Killed? No. But there have been missions where I didn't arrive in time." He'd gotten to scenes too late to stop a bullet to a child's head, and to pull a woman from a room filled with water. "I didn't kill them, but their lives are still in my hands. It's that way for all the citizens here, to us heroes."

"Who died?"

"I don't know all their names."

"No, I mean…I told you I knew you saw someone die, and you said something about not being able to get vengeance on them." He made a face. "I think. It was before Blue Rose called with the picture of Origami…Ivan…"

"Either one."

"…Yes. But answer me."

Kotetsu sighed. It wasn't a dark secret, and nothing to really lie about or hide. "My wife."

"Your wife died?" Barnaby's voice was quieter, his eyes wide.

"She was taken by illness. I can't do much about that."

"Ah…"

"I miss her," Kotetsu admitted. He didn't like talking about her death. Aside from the pain, it made him emotional and he didn't like anyone seeing him like that. But he couldn't help it. He didn't cry. But he couldn't smile, and he had an idea of just how down and out and pathetic he looked.

"I miss my parents too."

Kotetsu looked over at Barnaby, who was looking at the ground. Maybe it wasn't so bad if Barnaby could see how he felt, because that seemed to make him feel okay about showing his feelings as well. The poor kid. No one should have to go through losing their parents as such a young age. Barnaby's time with them was cut even shorter than his own with Tomoe.

He threw caution to the wind and put an arm over Barnaby's shoulders, feeling the other immediately tense up. "We won't let Jake get away with this. You know I'll help you through it."

"This is no one's problem but my own." Barnaby sighed.

"Didn't you listen to Blue Rose?"

"I heard every word that she said."

"Then why do you insist on this being your problem? It doesn't have to be like this."

Barnaby didn't reply, though Kotetsu swore he relaxed a little bit. He lingered for a moment and then walked away from Kotetsu, who just let his arm drop as he watched him go…for all of two seconds.

And then he followed.

Jake wanted to take them on one by one.

The heroes exchanged glances upon learning the news, but they knew they had no choice. Five minutes after Kotetsu and a calmer Barnaby had returned, another bridge exploded and the creepy exosuits came out of nowhere, seemingly appearing as the smoke and falling debris from the explosion started to clear. And then HeroTV was hijacked, the entire city watching Jake make threats instead of learning about the news from the special report.

For every hero he defeated, there would be more destruction, eventually leading to the collapse of the city. Jake was confident in his powers, it was clear. No one knew what they were. Going in without any information?

Kotetsu knew that was almost a death sentence, with a criminal who was at least classified as highly dangerous. He had dealt with the sort before and even knowing their powers they had proved to be challenges.

"What do we do?" Keith wondered out loud.

"What can we do? We'll do as he says, and send anyone he chooses," Agnes answered them all over a call. They all gathered around and were staring at her like she had answers, all except for Kotetsu and Barnaby.

"So we're just going to listen to the enemy?" Antonio asked. He sounded pretty pissed off.

"For now," Agnes answered. "The only other problem we can attempt to solve is how to disable those suits. There has to be a way. We have had applications for joining as a hero, maybe a second look, maybe there is something…"

"Should we be talking about this? Hasn't he tapped into communications?" Antonio, again.

"If we were using call bracelets," came Nathan's voice. "But this phone should be fine."

"Oh who cares about a PHONE?" Kotetsu finally shouted and turned to face them. "Why aren't we going out and at least going after the guy? Why aren't we finding a way to dig up information about his powers? All we're doing is standing around and complaining and no one is moving!"

"If we move, he will cause more destruction," Agnes said matter of factly. "So we have to think before we can do anything-"

Kotetsu started to slowly realize the stupidity of his outburst as Agnes was cut off and HeroTV, which had become static for a while, came back to life. "Aaaand time for the first pathetic pig I'll be facing!" Jake was saying. He had a wheel placed in front of him. Kriem gave it a spin and Jake casually tossed a dart at it, and as the wheel slowed everyone could see the dark in a section of the wheel that held a card of Sky High.

Everyone turned to Keith as Jake went on some speech about facing the King of Heroes.

"Hey…be careful." Nathan said it surprisingly quietly. He laid a hand on Keith's shoulder. "We don't know what we're up against."

"It's okay. I will defeat him, for Barnaby, and again, I will defeat him!" Keith said, but he was visibly shaky. Usually he was so confident in his skills, so willing just to charge in. That kind of anxiety was tough for all of them deal with.

"You hear that Bunny?" Kotetsu asked, breaking the silence. He turned to where Barnaby had been standing when Agnes had called.

He, and everyone else, just stared.

Barnaby was gone.

"No, you can't take off and go looking for him!"

Kotetsu winced as Agnes's voice came painfully over the phone, everyone else off getting ready. Keith was changing to go face Jake. The rest had been sent out to check on the situation with the suits, to defend and destroy if they could. Maverick and others on city council, plus a carefully selected crew, were going to be watching and analyzing the upcoming fight.

And Kotetsu? He was supposed to be leaving too, though he hadn't been paying attention to where because as usual, he had his own opinion of what he should be doing. "You don't understand Agnes, I HAVE to find Bunny! I have a really bad feeling!"

"Stop it with that weird nickname!"

"He likes it!"

"No he doesn't! Tiger…" she sighed. "We really need you on the defensive out there until we know more about who is actually with Jake and what we can do."

"Sky High will crush him. But I need to find Bunny before he does something he'll regret."

"Tiger!"

Kotetsu hung up the phone and got out of there. He'd managed to get into his suit a few minutes earlier, before making it clear that he had no intentions of sticking with the others. He was ready to go. There was some guilt for not going where he was supposed to. He should be helping people. His desire to do nothing but find Barnaby wasn't really good…it was unhealthy. But he hadn't been right for months, Kotetsu knew that. Why try to prove anything different?

When it came down to it he was so damn worried about his friend he knew he probably couldn't focus out there anyway.

From watching the television, Kotetsu knew where to go. He knew the stadium, and how to get there quickly. He just hoped he found Barnaby as soon as he got there. He booked it on his Lonely Chaser. Barnaby had taken the other.

When he arrived at his destination he realized it was going to be damn hard to get close to the stadium – there were exosuits everywhere. There was smoke and debris from destruction, and clusters of people trying to edge closer but being driven back by cops. All in all, it was a total mess and Kotetsu wasn't sure how to get in. Jake requested one hero, that hero being the one he randomly selected. Kotetsu would be in a lot of trouble if he tried to go in there in front of everyone. There would be no hiding his presence from Jake.

He couldn't just turn around and leave. Others had seen him arrive. That was okay – he would just act like he was there to keep the peace. Some of the officers even looked a little relieved to see him. He felt yet another pang of guilt, knowing he hadn't come there to help any of them. No one was in immediate danger, but he still felt like crap.

"I'm here to check on things," he told a few of the officers who made their way over to him. "So I'm going to walk the uh…perimeter and make sure nothing nasty is sneaking by us."

The officers gave each other looks, and Kotetsu wasn't actually sure what perimeter he was talking about, but in the end they seemed to buy it.

He went around the suits. One wrong step could set them off he imagined and he did not want to be responsible for that. The stadium was a big building and if he was lucky they wouldn't be completely around it. There were some buildings around it too, and they possibly connected to it. Kotetsu had never actually been in them. He knew the only way was to just go in and find out.

A strange feeling crept up on him, though, and he looked over his shoulder. A police officer was following him. Maybe it was out of concern, or suspicion. Kotetsu didn't worry too much. He could tell the guy to go away or lose him via speed if he needed to. That would be a dumb reason to activate his Hundred Power, though…

"Tiger!" the man called out as he continued to follow.

Kotetsu waved like he would at a fan and continued his little walk, looking for a door or way into the stadium that wasn't blocked. He had no luck so he ducked into a nearby alley when he was sure he was clear of the exosuits and most of the crowd that had gathered.

That damn cop still followed him, and worse, he got closer! Kotetsu sighed and stopped once he was halfway into the alley. He turned quickly on the poor young man approaching him – he looked to be in his twenties, greasy brown hair trapped under a police cap. He was an inch or so shorter than Kotetsu. "What is it? Look, you shouldn't be following me. I'm telling you right now, turn around and get out of here."

"But…Mr. Tiger…"

Kotetsu stared. The voice started to sound familiar, and so did the way he was called 'Mr. Tiger'. "Uh…" He couldn't place it though and decided to warn him again. "Whatever you need from me is not as important as making sure the civilians out there are safe. I need to get going."

"No, please! I…" The man sighed, glowed blue, and all the sudden there was Ivan.

Kotetsu's eyes went so wide he thought they'd pop right out of his head. "Ivan!" he yelped.

"Ssshh!" The look on Ivan's face was very alarmed. He was dressed in police clothes even outside his little illusion. "Don't say my name! They can't know I'm out here."

"They?" Kotetsu knelt down as Ivan went to rest against the wall and then slid into a sitting position against it. He crept forward so Ivan didn't have to talk very loudly.

"Jake. Eric, and Edward."

"I know who Jake is, but who are the other two?"

"Edward was a classmate of mine. He was meant to be a hero, and…he was my best friend," Ivan admitted. "And because of me, he shot someone and went to jail."

"Oh…" Kotetsu wanted to press how on earth that was Ivan's fault, but he supposed sometimes, things just went bad in a way no one expected.

"I spent a day away from the training center. Edward escaped from jail and while I was out he ah…well he caught me." Ivan looked away from him. "I didn't fight back."

"Why?" Kotetsu asked, as gently as he could.

"Because I messed up his life." Ivan's eyes were wet, shining. "I am the reason he went to jail, I am the reason he had his whole future slip away, all because I was a coward."

"Ivan…" Kotetsu sighed. Maybe he did need to ask about what happened. The problem was, he didn't have time. He needed to find Barnaby. "He killed someone and you didn't, right? Unless you gave him the gun and told him to pull the trigger, it's not your fault."

"Yes it is!" Ivan argued and covered his eyes with his wrist, sobbing by then. "He was my friend. He was my best friend and because I wasn't good enough, he paid for it! I failed to protect him. Haven't you ever…ever had a friend like that, that you wanted to protect, and if something happened to them while you were there…" He didn't finish his sentence. He didn't need too.

Kotetsu just kept thinking of Barnaby. He couldn't fail him. He couldn't fuck up and let Barnaby become a murderer like that Edward kid. He couldn't lose him and let Barnaby go as just another boy consumed with vengeance to the point he became a monster he should never be. That would be hard to take.

"Ivan, come here." Kotetsu couldn't let Ivan fall apart either. He tugged on his arm.

Ivan let himself be hauled into Kotetsu's arms, as much as they could manage anyway with him in his suit. Kotetsu wanted him to stop hurting. He was so scared for Barnaby, but he couldn't leave Ivan crying. "Why are you still here? You can change into anyone you want, so why stay?"

"If I leave, Edward will find me. Eric promised to torture people until I came back."

"Oh yea…Eric?"

"Edward's brother. Jake calls him 'Night Terror'." The name from the television. "I don't know what his exact power is, I just know he hurts people badly. I've only ever seen the results." He shuddered.

"And…what are those?"

Ivan took a deep breath, trying to pause in his sobs. "The victims are always unresponsive, terrified…a couple did die."

Whatever his power was, it was something to be feared, that was for sure. Kotetsu swallowed. "And…you helped them escape?" he asked carefully so that it didn't sound like an accusation. He knew Ivan would not have wanted to do that.

Ivan broke into fresh tears. "I did, Tiger, I had to! Edward made me, then we met Kriem, and….and they made me. And I've been kept here. Even if I wasn't, I'm too ashamed to come back."

"Shhh…so…Ivan, you know what's going on behind the scenes then, right? Like how they control those exosuits?" he asked.

"Yes…"

Kotetsu pushed him away slowly. "Then here's your chance to redeem yourself." He reached toward the back part of his suit where he had a small compartment. He didn't put much in there ever, just his bracelet, watch, and call band. It had been included in the suits designs to carry certain things for emergencies, something Kotetsu never did.

He fished out his call band and handed it to Ivan. "Get away from here. Call Agnes, tell them where you are – and what you've learned. You're going to save a lot of people by doing this."

Ivan blinked teary eyes at him. "But…but Edward and Eric…"

"Where were they last?"

"With Jake. They are all watching Jake and making sure no one extra shows up in the one on one combats."

"You'll be fine. The quicker you move, the quicker someone will help you and you can help them. You can do this, Ivan." Kotetsu finally pulled up his damn mask to give Ivan a stern no-shit look.

Ivan took a deep breath, and offered a shaky smile before speaking. "Th-thanks, Mr. Tiger." Then he changed forms and booked it out of there.

Kotetsu watched him go and then he let his calm shield falter. He flew into a panic and rushed down the alley. He needed to find Barnaby, more than anything in the world. He needed him to be okay. Safe, no blood on his hands…

His very sanity hinged on it.

Barnaby did not end up being difficult to locate.

A few minutes after Ivan left, Kotetsu managed to find a door into one of the nearby buildings, and as he suspected – it ended up connecting with the stadium. The building he entered turned out to be a pricey looking hotel so it made sense it had a direct connection to the stadium. He wondered why it wasn't guarded, though Jake couldn't possibly have an endless amount of exosuits. They were already stretched across the city. He wondered how his friends were doing with them.

The thought that whatever waited for him inside the stadium was far nastier than anything that could have guarded it occurred to him too. Kotetsu hoped like hell that was not the case. If it was, he'd deal.

The connection was a large hallway, empty and sort of creepy despite sunlight coming in through the windows on the side. He could see various pieces of trash from visitors on the ground – bubblegum wrappers, an empty soda cup, a toy skunk some kid had dropped. The thing looked like it'd been trampled. That gave Kotetsu even more of a creeped out feeling.

He entered the stadium lobby where there were several empty ticket booths and a dark snack bar. There was a lot more litter their too. Did those people ever clean up? Before he could think more about it, he heard a loud crash from the stadium, followed by the sounds of small explosions. Sky High…

Kotetsu rushed away from the lobby, easily finding the entrance to one end of the stadium. He peeked around the edge of the door carefully. There was Jake, blasting Sky High with strange purple laser beams. Sky High didn't look good. It made Kotetsu sick. He looked away when Sky High was down for the count and Jake approached him to deliver a victory speech.

When he looked away, he saw Barnaby.

Across from him in the empty seats the red and pink suit stood out quite a bit. Kotetsu wondered how he wasn't spotted already, unless he too had just arrived there. Barnaby was crouched down slightly, and completely still. Had he left his suit like that somehow? No, Kotetsu dismissed the thought, that was ridiculous.

He ducked back inside and circled around inside, looking for the door leading to the other side. It was a longer walk than he anticipated and when he looked out the opposite door, he could see Jake, two other men and the girl called Kriem gathered together, talking.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Kotetsu jumped and looked to his right to see Barnaby. He couldn't see his face, but he was sure he was glaring even as he spoke in a soft tone – likely to keep his voice down and keep from being overheard.

"I came to find you."

"…Old man, get out of here."

"No, Bunny. I can't allow you to go too far. But I am here to fight by your side."

"Get. Lost."

Kotetsu didn't like that tone. It had remained soft, but chilling at the same time.

"No."

Barnaby lunged at him. Kotetsu was too surprised to even think about dodging and he went down hard through the door. He landed with a crash and panicked – could they hear that? Barnaby must not have shared his fear because the next second he was down on top of Kotetsu with a hand around his throat. It wasn't like Barnaby could choke him through the suit, but the threat alone was scary.

"Bunny stop…"

"My name isn't Bunny! What the fuck is it with you! Leave me alone! Stay away from my fight!" he practically screamed.

"Shh ssshh Barnaby please, you need to calm down!" Kotetsu continued to speak somewhat quietly.

"No! Is this what it takes maybe? To get you to shut up and leave me alone? Listen you fool I don't care if I kill this man! Whatever stupid regret and terrors you think will follow me – they already do."

Kotetsu stared up at him. "Then all the more reason you need-"

"NEED?" Barnaby yelled, incredulous. Then he laughed. "I don't need you. No one needs you."

"…" Kotetsu didn't respond. A heavy, awkward silence fell over them, and Barnaby's hands loosened just enough, his head pulled back. Kotetsu wasn't sure, but it was as though Barnaby realized he had crossed a line. "Fuck you, you little brat."

"Huh?" Barnaby let go of his neck.

Hot tears poured down Kotetsu's face and it took him a minute to realize he was crying. He felt a hollow pain in his chest, sinking into his stomach. Barnaby was right.

No one needed him. He was part of a marketing gimmick – Barnaby didn't need him to fight with. No one did. They were all capable of handling the crimes in Stern Bild. Home? If Kaede had really needed him she would have wanted him to stay, right? His mom, his brother, they could take care of themselves, and each other.

He had no point in being.

"Fuck you," he repeated, and to his dismay the 'you' came out in a high voice that was an obvious sob. His mask hid that he was crying, but his voice didn't want to do the same.

"Are you-" Kotetsu didn't want him to say it. "-crying?"

"F-fu…yoo…" He couldn't even get the insult out again.

"Kotetsu…"

It was probably the first time Kotetsu had heard Barnaby say his name. He should have been overjoyed. Instead he turned his head away, trying to turn his body too but Barnaby still trapped him down. He wanted to crawl, walk, run away from there. He didn't know where he'd even go.

"H-hey, what…what…"

It was almost funny, the way Barnaby had absolutely no idea how to react to Kotetsu's behavior. Almost touching. Kotetsu hurt too much to care.

He still couldn't bring himself to care when an unfamiliar voice came from behind Barnaby. "Well well, what have we got here?"

"Heroes, trying to sneak in. And here we thought they would respect the way we have chosen our challengers." A second unfamiliar voice. "It seems they decided to make out instead."

Barnaby jumped up and off of Kotetsu. "Who are you?" he asked, trying to keep his voice level and calm but failing.

"He doesn't know us…" the first voice said.

Kotetsu faced forward after a moment. He saw two men. The shorter one had light brown, almost tannish-red hair. It was cut extremely short, a buzz cut. He looked angry.

The man beside him had hair slightly shaggier and more reddish in color, and he was taller – about Barnaby's height. He had a similar sort of angry look to him, though his eyes were smaller than his brother's, 'beady' almost. There was something very creepy about him even if he really looked like a normal guy. Neither of the two were dressed oddly, the shorter one in a tan jacket and jeans, and the taller one wearing a white dress shirt and black slacks. The taller on also had a tattoo on his arm, that looked like the human brain…it added immensely to the creepy factor.

"Well Edward, we ought to make these two know their place." The brothers. That meant the taller one was Eric.

"Mmmhmm. You're coming with us."

"I don't think so," Barnaby all but growled.

The two exchanged glances before Eric spoke again. "We're guessing you came here for Master Jake. Come with us. You'll get nowhere if you fight either of us. Even if you were to win with us, you'd get nowhere."

Kotetsu supposed that was true enough…judging by the way they referred to Jake as Master, he had to wager he was freakishly powerful and they were just along for the ride at that point.

"Fine." Barnaby looked back down at Kotetsu, then to the brothers again. "And him?"

"Both of you," they answered in unison.

"No." Kotetsu didn't have the energy to get up.

"He will come, or we will go ahead and kill him right now. He looks pathetic enough," Edward commented.

Barnaby sighed and knelt down, reaching for one of Kotetsu's hands. "You have to get up. Please."

Kotetsu didn't really feel like dying, at least not at the hands of those criminals, so with a loud groan and a lot of effort, he took Barnaby's hand and let himself be hauled up. He wobbled on his feet and Barnaby took his whole arm to keep him steady. When Barnaby let him go, Kotetsu stood there.

He just couldn't find the strength to take a single step. "Can't," was all he said.

Barnaby sighed but said nothing. He took Kotetsu's arm and tugged, and despite the way his mind screamed at him not to follow the little asshole, Kotetsu let himself be dragged along as they followed the two brothers.

Kotetsu found himself unable to give much of a reaction when they were all gathered. Eric, Edward, Jake, and Kriem, the last two settled on a couch in front of a table with delicate teacups on it. It was creepy, out of place in the stadium where Sky High had been defeated. Debris from the fight hung around, though not nearly as much as Kotetsu had expected. It must have been over quickly.

Jake was grinning, surprised at the arrival of two of the heros. "Ahhh, and here I thought HeroTV and the mayor would just respect the challenges I've issued! I suppose not."

"Lowlifes," Kriem scoffed.

"Well, what can you expect from pigs who work for the 'normal' people? They're just following the herd. I believe another blow to Stern Bild's support is in order."

"Too true, Master Jake," Kriem responded and picked up some sort of communicator. She paused and gave it an odd look, but then pressed something and looked relieved.

"What are we going to do with them?" Edward asked. "Oh hey, where's Ivan?"

"Never mind that now," Eric responded, and pointed at Kotetsu. "Him. Let me play with him."

"Eh?" Jake looked up at Eric. "Why?"

Eric gave Kotetsu a hard shove. He wavered in place, but didn't do anything about it. He didn't know what to do, having nearly retreated into his own mind. Kotetsu watched boredly as Eric gave Barnaby a shove as well and Barnaby swung an arm at him.

"Ah, what's this?" Jake cried, suddenly excited as he jumped to his feet. "Haha! He's given up? Look at your hero, Stern Bild." A teddy bear to the side of the couch held a camera, and it zoomed in on Kotetsu. He hadn't even bothered questioning that.

"Ko…Tiger," Barnaby hissed, and Jake's attention snapped to him.

"Worried about your precious partner?" Barnaby stiffened. "Very well, you win, you get him back. But first," Jake backed away at first, leaning down to whisper something in Kriem's ear. When he was done, he gave her a surprisingly gentle kiss on the cheek and turned his focus back to the others.

"Why did you do it?" Barnaby suddenly asked.

"What?" Jake stared.

"Why did you kill my parents?"

"Your what? Why the hell do you think I'd remember that?"

Silence, and then Barnaby lunged at the man with a mangled scream. Jake snapped his fingers and a purplish wave, more like a barrier than a laser, flashed out and hit Barnaby in the chest. He flew back into the air and Jake rushed forward, their fight finally initiated.

Kotetsu wanted to watch, he wanted to see Barnaby get vengeance – and then something hit the back of his head, something hard and even with the helmet on it hurt. It hit again and the world went dark.

"Uggghhh." It hurt, it hurt, everything hurt.

"Kotetsu. Kotetsu." A familiar, female voice.

"Tomoe?" he asked, and was rewarded with her coming into sight. Kotetsu could tell right away that it was a dream. The surrounding was just…white. He was nowhere but a white dream. But it was so lucid…

"Yes darling, it's me."

"Tomoe! I miss you," he told her. He wanted to cry. But he couldn't. It was as if he physically was incapable of crying. That was troubling…

"Oh Kotetsu. If only I wasn't taken from you so early in life," she said gently, stroking his face. He could feel it.

"If only I could have kept you from getting sick…"

"You know you couldn't of," she said, her fingers brushing his cheek. Still strange, the way he could feel every touch.

"No…it's not something I saw coming, and there's nothing I could do."

"Absolutely nothing," she commented.

Kotetsu blinked at her. Something was off. "Tomoe?"

"If only you could have protected me. Shouldn't a hero be able to do that? But you failed, Kotetsu, you failed. And now I'm no longer here with you." Her fingers moved to comb through his dark hair. "Can you even protect Kaede?"

"Hey…"

"How can you save anyone?" she asked, her lips on his forehead. It was unpleasant and a chill ran through his body. Her voice had changed, sounding lower than it ever had before.

"I can save people…I have been, with Barnaby," he supplied weakly.

"Oh yes, that boy. You should leave him alone before you mess his life up too." Her lips found his cheek. "That poor man, with a leech like you hanging around, useless as ever."

"I…" It was true, though. Then she kissed him on the lips, and it hurt. Her tongue probed into his mouth; it was uncomfortable. She bit on his bottom lip and he felt as though it were bleeding.

He tried to push her away, succeeding briefly. "Stop, stop," he pleaded.

"This is the only affection you'll ever get. I'm gone, and certainly your pretty partner won't be interested in an old thing like you." Definitely not Tomoe. She kissed him again, deeper, and he wanted to throw up.

He pushed at her, more and more, and suddenly she became a white flash.

Kotetsu gasped as he woke up. It hurt. Someone was sitting on his chest. Tomoe? No, not Tomoe. But someone was there, and he could feel the air being crushed from him while wicked laughter reached his ears. Tilting his head back he could see Eric laughing, one hand outstretched as a dark fog-like substance stretched out over Kotetsu, silver sparkles raining from it onto him. They would have been beautiful if he wasn't in agony.

His suit was off. They'd removed it. No wonder that person on his chest was killing him. There was no protection. He wanted to roll around, do something in reaction to the pain but aside from limited movement with his head and neck, he was paralyzed. Drugged? Maybe. He couldn't think. But he could listen.

"Fun, huh?" Eric laughed. His voice sounded muffled.

"I don't know about this," came Edward's voice.

"Oh pssshht. It's because of people like him that you've had a shitty life."

"Not really…and he was never one of them anyway."

"What are you thinking Edward?" Eric's voice was sharp, angry. The sparkles began to diminish, probably since Eric was distracted.

The pain increased and Kotetsu wanted to scream. He couldn't. Instead he went unconscious again.

He was woken back up by a crash and an explosion. And there was no pain on his chest either, but he was uncomfortably on his side, probably from rolling around.

"Woah woah fuck fuck! What the hell is wrong with this creep?" Eric tripped over Kotetsu, the resulting kick leaving Kotetsu cringing in pain.

Eric pulled himself up and kept running, screaming. A green and blue fire chased him even as he ducked inside the stadium. That didn't stop his pursuer. A flash of a cape, more fire, and Kotetsu was sure he recognized Lunatic. He'd seen a few photos of him, taken before Barnaby was hurt and the criminal seemingly withdrew from the city.

Another explosion, that time from the fight in the stadium. The fight Kotetsu had forgotten about momentarily, failing his partner most spectacularly by not even knowing what was going on. He heard Barnaby yell, and saw him fly in the air.

His suit looked messed up. Jake was laughing. Jake was winning. Barnaby charged him and again, he was knocked back hard. Kotetsu watched but couldn't pull himself up. His body, his mind, it all hurt too much. His suit was off, and the sun beat down on him in a most unpleasant way. His cheek felt burnt.

His head pounded, between the noises of Lunatic and Eric and the battle of Jake and Barnaby. Edward was nowhere to be seen, while Kotetsu was sure Kriem was still sitting on that couch like a goddamn queen.

"Aaaaaahhhh!" Another scream, and suddenly Barnaby landed with an ugly metal thud on the ground near him. He had to pause, probably to get his breath, and then he began to crawl to his feet.

Then Barnaby noticed Kotetsu. "Are you winning?" Kotetsu asked. His voice was hoarse. His throat hurt. He became dimly aware of his eyes feeling as though tears had been rapidly pouring out of them again. Maybe he had cried during that dream, cried himself hoarse.

"Old m…Kotetsu, what did they do to you!" Barnaby asked, concern clear in his voice which prevented Kotetsu from thinking he imagined it."

"Made me take a nap…"

Barnaby crawled closer, flipped up his mask, and peered down at his partner. "You look…you look…"

'Broken', Kotetsu's mind supplied. "Don't worry about how I look. You've got Jake to deal with."

"I can't land any hits…" Barnaby glanced off to the side.

"You can do it. Sometimes it just takes a while to land a punch." Kotetsu tried to lift his arm to give a thumbs up. He was too tired to do it.

"I don't…I guess so." Barnaby's voice was so unsure.

"Aww, talking to your useless partner?" Jake approached them, far too casually. "I see Night Terror took him apart quite well."

"Don't you dare talk about him like that." Barnaby's words were short, crisp, cold. He still looked at Kotetsu though his words were directed at Jake.

"He's hardly worth talking about." Jake waved his hand dismissively.

Jake was starting another taunt, Kotetsu looked down at the ground while thinking Jake spoke the truth, and Barnaby snapped. He whirled on Jake with an enraged scream, louder and more primal than when they had first begun their fight.

Kotetsu heard a cry of surprise from Jake, and then everything went dark again.

His eyes opened to blurry visions of flames. Lunatic's flames, blue and green. They were close to him. He could feel the heat on his already sunburnt cheek.

"…awake, I can get you up easier." Barnaby's voice, mid-sentence as Kotetsu's vision started to be clearer.

"Huuuuggh?" he groaned.

A tug to his arm, a strong pull and he was immediately on his feet. He started to sink down, but Barnaby was glowing blue – he was using his powers, he had him, and even though Kotetsu didn't know what was happening around them, he knew he was safe.

Barnaby scooped him into his arms, and started running. "I only have twenty seconds left."

"Only twenty…" Kotetsu's head hurt and his brain was taking a while to catch up with him. Twenty didn't sound so bad. Seconds were longer than people made them out to be.

Sometimes.

He was sure for Barnaby the time was going too fast. It was hard to see above them or he was sure Barnaby would have just jumped out of there: smoke, fire, ashes, a helicopter spotlight that was a little blinding even in the daytime...Kotetsu checked his surroundings. He couldn't see Lunatic, but he could see a lifeless, burnt body on the ground. He didn't need to ask how that happened, his question was who.

"Jake," he said hoarsely, unable to get more out.

"That's not him," Barnaby said softly, running for one of the emergency exits that lead out onto the street rather than into either of the neighboring buildings. "Jake has been taken care of."

"Did you-"

"I didn't kill him." Barnaby rushed forward, taking full advantage of his power then. Kotetsu couldn't help but wonder what he was running from if none of the bad guys seemed to be around. Lunatic's fires burned actively, somehow, but not even he was around. They were left behind in an instant though as Barnaby rushed through that exit, onto the street.

Kotetsu expected him to stop and pay attention to the people who were cheering. They must have seen Jake go down on camera. And there were smiles, so many smiles.

But Barnaby didn't stop. He took off into the air with Kotetsu, bouncing off of buildings and getter farther and farther from the battleground. He stopped, his glow faded, and Kotetsu realized that they were outside his building. How Barnaby knew where he lived, he had no idea, but it was an immense relief to see the place that held his own bed, his clothes, food, safety and comfort.

"Bunny?" He was still anxious, scared, sad, and a whole bundle of emotions, unfortunately, and he wanted to talk to someone as he found himself able to think. "Why did you bring me all the way here?"

"…I was worried."

"Worried? About me?"

Barnaby opened his mask. He looked very tired, absolutely drained. "Yes, I know it's hard to believe," he mumbled. "But you looked so…so…" He swallowed, and it was clear he didn't want to admit it.

Kotetsu sighed, finding footing as Barnaby finally set him down. "You can say it."

"Pathetic."

"Ah…oh…"

"I'm not trying to insult you, old man. They took you out of your suit while you were unconscious. I think. I wasn't exactly able to watch. Every time I saw you, you were rolling around in weird positions and crying. One of the times I was tossed over I heard you say the name 'Tomoe', and I kind of gathered…" He went quiet again, and Kotetsu understood he wasn't going to explain anymore.

He didn't need to. "I had a nightmare. Then I woke up and couldn't breathe and everything hurt. Then I guess I had bad dreams I can't remember."

Barnaby nodded and gave Kotetsu a gentle push toward his building. "You need to sleep."

"That's the LAST thing I need! I was just sleeping!"

"That wasn't sleeping. That was mental torture." Barnaby pushed him again, and then walked in front of him, up to the door and opening it. "Come on."

Kotetsu looked at him cautiously, but he went in, and Barnaby closed the door so he could follow behind. Having Barnaby escort him in, up the elevator, to his apartment, in his suit...strange was putting it lightly.

They got in and Kotetsu felt embarrassed. His home wasn't filthy, but it was disorganized and there were quite a few beer cans. Barnaby didn't say a thing about it. Instead he asked "Where's your bed?"

"Upstairs in the loft. Don't worry about that, though, I can sleep on my couch."

"Kotetsu…"

His name. Kotetsu smiled. "Seriously, my couch is fine. I have blankets in a closet and there's pillows, so…"

"Go get your blankets then."

Kotetsu did so, the gears in his head trying to work out why Barnaby was still there. He must have said or done something worrisome when they were in the stadium, possibly when he was having the nightmare about Tomoe. Why else would Barnaby have followed him and kept such a close watch? Like a doctor keeping their patient on watch…

He felt bad and good at the same time. Barnaby cared enough to take him home and get him to sleep. That was something soft and sweet that he did not expect at all. Maybe it was just pity, but it warmed Kotetsu all the same.

He crawled onto the couch and situated himself with the blanket he'd pulled. "Should I maybe be in a hospital instead?" he asked, concerned. His body and mind began to hurt badly again, and he saw flashes of scenes that upset him. He was sure the police and just about everyone at Apollon wanted to speak to him too.

"Maybe." Barnaby didn't move.

"Why didn't you take me to a hospital?"

"I don't know. Go to sleep."

Kotetsu sighed and closed his eyes, thinking that was impossible, but he slipped off almost immediately.

He was surprised to wake up to Barnaby. He wasn't in his suit though, nor was he alone. A well-dressed man stood next to him, older with short white hair and a nose that was quite frankly, freakishly round. He was thin and short and writing on a clipboard.

Kotetsu groaned and tried to wake himself up more. He drew himself into a sitting position before actually acknowledging the other two. He rubbed his eyes, scratched his beard, stretched his arms, and then spoke. "What the hell is going on?"

"Observation," said the stranger in a deep voice that did not fit that body.

"Kotetsu, this is Dr. Nance. He's a psychologist. You were mumbling so much in your sleep, I decided to get someone."

"How long were you watching me sleep?" Kotetsu asked, a little freaked out. Barnaby went and got a head doctor to come stare at him?

"I went back to Apollon. I've given a few interviews, a police report, helped clean the stadium, filled out paperwork, watched myself defeat Jake several times, and come back here to see how you were doing, all in the time you've been out."

"How long have I been out?"

"Ah…." Barnaby thought for a moment. "About 30 hours."

"WHAT!" How was that even possible? The human body could just sleep that long? Kotetsu barely got 6 hours of sleep on a good night. He knew people went into comas and such, but those were normally much longer, weren't they?

"You might see why I came back to check. There was another doctor here earlier, and physically you're okay, except for some burns. Dr. Nance was the next step."

"I see." Kotetsu turned his attention to the doctor. "And…?"

"How do you feel, Kaburagi?" Dr. Nance asked suddenly. His name…the man knew his identity. Kotetsu found he didn't really care, any doctor would probably have to know that.

"Still a little tired."

"Happy? Sad?"

"Oh uh…I don't know. I'm a little happy." Barnaby had checked on him.

"I see." Dr. Nance scribbled something down. "You didn't fight anyone at the stadium, correct?"

"No, I was sort of knocked out, I guess. I don't really know what happened."

"Night Terror…we believe he found your fears and worries, and used them to create nightmares for you, extremely personalized nightmares. I don't know how he knew what to use. And he recreated an actual night terror, possibly. Did you feel a weight on your chest?"

"Yes." Kotetsu nodded, feeling exposed at the same time.

"We have come across some of Night Terror's victims, each responds differently. Kotetsu, going by what Brooks here has told me, I think there's issues you need to cope with before you go back to work."

"…What?"

Dr. Nance continued. "It's easy enough to set you up with a therapist to talk to. You may be all right. It's very hard to figure out with such an encounter, an attack on your emotions and memories. But again, your partner has given me some information about your behavior."

Kotertsu glared at Barnaby, who flinched.

"So I am giving you this card." Dr. Nance stepped forward and pushed a business card at Kotetsu, with a piece of paper attached to it. "And you have an appointment. Please show up. I know these things can be difficult and you might feel ashamed, but be proud Kaburagi. You've still been out there putting your life on the line to save others." He smiled as Kotetsu took the paper. "We all have troubles at times, some just need guidance to get through it. With professional help and support from friends like your partner, I think you'll see brighter days."

"I..thanks." Put like that, Kotetsu didn't feel as irritated and upset that a psychologist just showed up in his home. It was true, what he said, except he didn't know if he and Barnaby were really friends. "I'll try to remember, I mean, I'll go to my appointment." He set down the card and paper before offering his hand to shake.

Dr. Nance took it, a gentle shake with a firm grip. "Good. I'll speak to you again, soon probably. Brooks, will you walk with me outside?"

"Sure." Barnaby spared another glance at Kotetsu. That time Kotetsu didn't glare, he just gave him a nod and looked at the paper.

Barnaby returned in about ten minutes.

"You're back?" Kotetsu asked, surprised.

"I am." Barnaby sat on the couch near Kotetsu, letting the older man scoot over a bit first. "I don't feel like going out there and dealing with everything right now."

"But you defeated your parents' murderer, aren't you happy?"

Barnaby smiled and leaned back. "Of course I am. But I'm tired. I don't mind interviews, and signing some pictures usually but right now…"

"Mm." Kotetsu understood. Barnaby was a star who definitely pandered to his audience, but even he needed a break sometimes especially when a lot had happened. "What happened out there?"

"I don't know…I couldn't land any hits. But when I landed near you and saw how messed up you looked, Jake taunting…I snapped. I don't even know what I was thinking, I moved without any plan. Like someone flipped a switch and I just acted. I pummeled him into the ground."

"Strange."

"Yes. Anyway, I stopped before he could be beaten to death and that's about when Lunatic showed up. Not sure where he came from, but he decided to throw something at me first. I got out of the way and he sort of hit Jake…"

"I thought that the body I saw-"

"Kriem dragged Jake out of there trying to revive him. I think she got picked up by the police. Anyway, the body you saw was Night Terror."

Kotetsu felt a little sick. He wanted the man to be punished, but dead? "Ah, oh."

"Lunatic had to chase him a bit. I tried to stop him but I almost got hit again."

Kotetsu snorted. "So, all we had to do for any of this was call in Lunatic." Wonderful.

"I took care of myself. Jake was pleading for me not to kill him. I could have easily turned him in." Barnaby frowned. "I think Lunatic showed up for Night Terror, but decided to get Jake while he saw him."

"Oh. …And the other one, Edward?"

Barnaby just shrugged.

So one still on the run, and probably the least dangerous of them all. That was some relief. "Bunny, when Night Terror had me-"

"I'm sorry."

"Huh?"

"Kotetsu, when I yelled at you back there, when you showed up. I had no right to say what I said to you, and I apologize. You're needed."

Kotetsu nodded slowly, his whole body tensed up and anxious for some reason. "I know that you were really worked up, it happens."

"It shouldn't happen." Barnaby stood back up and sighed. "I've thought about it a lot. How would my parents feel if they could have seen that? I'm sure they would not have tolerated me saying such cruel things. I know they would have been disappointed to see me make someone cry when he was just watching out for me."

Well that was embarrassing. Kotetsu didn't really want to be reminded of his obvious crying. So he said nothing.

"Kotetsu, I'm sorry for not thinking about how you felt during any of this. Had I actually paid attention earlier I would have realized that you've been very depressed."

"I…" Kotetsu wanted to protest that, but what was the use? It was obvious at that point. And chilling to know he had not been able to hide it as well as he'd thought. Barnaby may not have noticed it until lately, but he still noticed. He wanted to tell him not to tell anyone, but Nathan and Antonio already knew, and they were really the only others who mattered that much.

"I didn't tell anyone." Barnaby stepped closer, standing right in front of him. "I never do…" he groaned. "I never do this. Stand up."

"Why?"

"Just listen to me and do it."

The command had Kotetsu smiling. There didn't seem to be arrogance or anger behind it. Barnaby seemed nervous, actually. So, he stood up. "What now?"

To his surprise Barnaby put his arms around him and pulled Kotetsu closer into a tight but comfortable hug. Kotetsu didn't react at first. He stood there limply, his chin against Barnaby's shoulder and nose almost in those blonde curls. Barnaby was warm, solid, and Kotetsu finally hugged him back. He gripped the back of his shirt tightly. If he let go Barnaby could vanish, his head said.

Barnaby hugged him for a long time. It was a couple of minutes before he let go and Kotetsu immediately missed the feel of being in that embrace. Barnaby gently pushed him back, Kotetsu's hands resting on his arms.

"Bunny? …Thanks," Kotetsu said after nearly a minute.

Barnaby smiled.

"…He could read our minds."

"Pretty much." Barnaby handed Kotetsu a coffee, having returned to the nearly empty office from a short break. The few days following Jakes defeat and the talk with Barnaby had been pretty good. They'd been a little awkward too at first, because Barnaby knew something about his mental state. Kotetsu was very uncomfortable with it at first, but for someone who held such a cold exterior, Barnaby had been very warm and even patient with him.

When Kotetsu worked up the courage to ask his about it again, Barnaby mentioned his parents like before. He'd been thinking and remembering some things, the way his parents talked to him and treated him – they wanted him to be someone who would be kind to others. And that meant not being a dick to his partner who had been worried about him.

The change in Barnaby was hard to adapt to as well.

"I thought his power was those barriers?" Kotetsu asked, confused. He sipped his coffee and turned his chair away from his computer, leaning back.

"He had two. The files I dug up – and it wasn't easy, getting to records from the prison – they explained very well why he was in solitary confinement. Harder to read thoughts when you're alone."

"I suppose. So that's why you didn't land any hits?"

Barnaby nodded, leaning against the desk. "And it's also why I did land some. Hard for him to read a mind that's blank. Like I said, I wasn't really thinking."

"Have you ever had that happen before?"

"No…" Barnaby made a face. "At least, I don't think so. It's been hard to remember some stuff lately."

"No wonder, you've been so stressed out."

"But I feel better so…" Barnaby shook his head.

"Give it some time Bunny. Hey, you should come to the therapist with me! Maybe she'll know! Or he…"

Barnaby snorted and shook his head. "Sorry Kotetsu, you'll have to face your first session alone."

Kotetsu worked on his coffee, annoyed that he'd been found out. It would have been weird to bring Barnaby anyway. He just wanted something to calm him down. "I wonder how much I'll have to go."

"You'll go until they say it's okay not to," Barnaby said suddenly and sharply, giving Kotetsu a glare that made him cower. "We don't know what Night Terror did. There is probably a lot of damage there."

"Whatever," Kotetsu said sullenly.

"It's for your own good…how's Ivan anyway?"

"Shaken up." Kotetsu was glad to have the questions be about someone else. "He's okay, though it's hard to get him away from Nathan and Pao-Lin."

"I see."

"He's scared of Edward coming back, where ever he is. But I don't think he'll come back for Ivan again." Kotetsu shrugged. "If the experience with Jake was anything to go by, he probably learned kidnapping someone out of revenge isn't worth it."

Barnaby shrugged and headed to his desk. "Let's hope that's the case. Kotetsu?"

"What?"

"You used to annoy the crap out of me saying I could come talk to you. The same goes for you. I need you able to function as my partner, so if something is wrong, tell me." Barnaby's cheeks were a light shade of pink.

"Sure…" Kotetsu didn't really mean it, though he would try.

"And if I tell you you're acting stupid, it's not to be mean. Sometimes people are just stupid."

Kotetsu laughed a little at that, because it was true. "Right, Bunny.

"And tell the therapist you need a way to stop calling me 'Bunny'."

"Awww, it's not so bad is it?" Kotetsu said with a huge grin on his face.

Barnaby didn't answer. He glanced off to the side, and then spun his chair back to face the computer. He didn't say anything else for at least an hour. Kotetsu felt sort of optimistic in that moment. He hoped things would continue to get better. At the same time, he was all too aware of the bumps he was going to hit and ditches he would fall into along the way.


	4. Run away with my heart

Summer rushed by.

Kotetsu felt like he missed it, because as much as he tried to help himself he just ended up stressed out. His therapy sessions went about as well as could be expected. The first one was pleasant enough. He met his therapist, a Dr. Kim Hawkins. She was in her 40's, a round woman with curly, pretty brown hair. She had a soft voice and there was always a bowl of chocolates on the coffee table in her office. She asked him what was bothering him, and if he couldn't pinpoint it, just to talk. Kotetsu immediately clammed up, but by the end of the first appointment he felt a little more relaxed and had been able to talk about a few minor details at least.

Opening up more was difficult. He hit times when he just went silent and sullen, and Kim couldn't get a word out of him. She was patient, she probably had to be. She never got mad at him. As aggravating as he was sure he could be, Kotetsu knew there was no way he was her worst patient. He managed to stay away from any extremes, anger and violence, even if his low self-worth went pretty far.

Barnaby kept him company a lot, coming by after calls and once in a while stopping in during the morning. He had implied several times that he could stay overnight to see how Kotetsu was doing, but that was just too weird. Kotetsu didn't like the mother hen type role Barnaby appeared to settle into. Still, he did enjoy his company and felt sad when Barnaby left.

"What's that?" Kotetsu's asked one night as he sat on the couch in his apartment, watching the television after a long day. The better part of the afternoon had been spent dealing with a venomous NEXT with a nasty sense of entitlement. Kotetsu managed to get away without a scratch, while Barnaby had to keep a bandage on his right arm and tend to the sting with a prescribed balm every couple of hours. He didn't appear to be in any pain after the incident though he'd been quite sick earlier and it was at Kotetsu's insistence that they hang out together for the evening.

That made him feel bad that he was sitting on his ass while Barnaby messed around in the kitchen, though apparently all he wanted to do was make tea. "It's tea," he replied to Kotetsu, giving him his best 'wow you're dumb' look even as he set the cup carefully on a coaster on the table in front of Kotetsu.

"No, I mean, what kind? It smells different."

"St. John's Wort," Barnaby answered. "It's a natural remedy, it's…supposed to make you feel better."

"An antidepressant, in other words," Kotetsu said.

"No, just something soothing."

"Strange to give me this months after I started therapy."

"Yea, well, your progress is slow, so…"

"And that totally makes me feel better." Kotetsu sighed and stared at the tea, still a little too hot to drink. It was true. He had snapped at Barnaby more than he needed to and Barnaby would sometimes snap back but it was apparent he was hurt by Kotetsu doing that.

Kotetsu would wonder why he stuck by him at times, before realizing again and again that the friendship they had developed a little before, and certainly after the Jake incident, had become important to both of them. The good times with Barnaby outweighed the bad, it wasn't like all Kotetsu did was sit around being grumpy and angry. Their relationship was more important than anything else really, save for his daughter of course. Kotetsu sometimes went out with Nathan and Antonio, but he was happier spending 'social' time with Barnaby or talking to Kaede on the phone.

He hated that he couldn't tell her the whole truth. She knew when he was lying. She'd seen him down before, when he got hired back by Apollon. So, he told her that 'Daddy was trying to be happier' and that was about it. And then they would talk, though she could get mad sometimes about the fact he never came home to visit.

"Are you going to try the tea?" Barnaby asked some minutes later. He was sitting down by then but staring at Kotetsu as if he was going to dart off.

"No…"

"Do it."

"What, do you think it'll work instantaneously?" he asked.

"Just do it."

Kotetsu took a sip and made a face. Not the best tasting stuff, but maybe that meant that it'd be more liklely to work. "It's not that good. But I'll drink it."

"Good. By the way, I'm staying over tonight."

Kotetsu's hand twitched and he almost dropped the cup. "Huh? No. I don't need a babysitter, Bunny."

"I don't care, I'm staying here. You and Kim talked about Night Terror specifically yesterday, right?"

"Yes…"

"You told me that didn't go well. No, I'm staying tonight. I want you to be able to function this week. I don't want another incident like last month with that unruly flying NEXT."

That had been a bad week. Kotetsu talked to Kim about Night Terror then too, and Tomoe and it made him sort of useless for the rest of the week. "I've been better since that."

"I don't care. I mean, I DO care, but I'm staying."

"You don't have any night stuff here."

"It's not hard for me to carry a toothbrush over, and I assume you have some lounging clothes and milk."

Kotetsu indeed had those, and thus no excuse.

The funny thing was that Barnaby was no better off than Kotetsu was at night.

Barnaby admitted to Kotetsu, and Kotetsu only, that he still had horrible nightmares. Sometimes he had migraines after trying too hard to recall this memory or another, and other times he just wanted to cry. So, as Kotetsu went to bed, he decided it was better that Barnaby did stay because at least if one if nightmares occurred that night then he could be of some comfort.

If anything woke him up, Kotetsu expected it to be the scream. Instead he woke up to silence. There were no sounds, Kotetsu felt fine, so why did he wake up? He was so wide awake too, but it was still dark out. He looked at his clock. It was just a bit past two in the morning. He had been asleep maybe three hours. But he just felt so awake…and he had to piss.

He made his way down from his loft – boy had he been lucky to get ahold of another apartment with one – and went to the bathroom. He tried to be as quiet as possible since Barnaby was asleep on the couch. Instead he stubbed his toe on wall by the bathroom and yelped. He caught himself, quietly swore, and tip-toed into the living room to check on his partner.

"Kotetsu, Kotetsu," Barnaby said, much to his surprise.

"What?"

Barnaby just repeated his name, sounding increasingly more alarmed and Kotetsu realized he was still asleep. He couldn't see his face but he sensed something was wrong. He felt for the edge of the couch and found Barnaby's leg at first. Barnaby's whole body twitched almost violently and Kotetsu quickly found the couch instead. When he was sure he was in the right spot he knelt down. Barnaby's voice told him he was where he needed to be.

"Bunny, hey, I think you're having a bad dream." He wondered if that could escalate to nightmare.

Barnaby just groaned like he was in pain, so Kotetsu reached out and found his shoulder; Barnaby was lying on his side facing him. He rubbed his arm. Barnaby shivered which clued Kotetsu in on the fact he'd kicked off his blanket. Kotetsu hurried to find it and pull it back up over Barnaby, making sure it was wrapped around his shoulders.

"Kotetsu? What are you doing?" Barnaby's voice sounded much sleepier than moments before. Kotetsu knew he was somewhat awake at least.

"Making sure you're comfortable."

"Huh?"

"You kicked your blanket off. I just came down for the bathroom and to check on you," he said, fudging the truth. He might have checked on Barnaby anyway…but he wasn't sure he should mention the fact that Barnaby kept saying his name.

"Oh…why are you up? Are you okay?"

Kotetsu immediately felt a hand almost clumsily slap his face and poke him in the eye. "Ouch!" Barnaby was reaching for him apparently, but he could see even less than Kotetsu normally without his glasses. He had no chance in the dark.

"Oh, that was your eye, huh."

"Yea, what the hell are you trying to do?" he grumbled, rubbing at his eye while Barnaby's hand found his shoulder.

"Dunno," came the sleepy reply as Barnaby grabbed his nightshirt gently.

"…Okay, well, obviously you're still half in dreamland, so I'm going back up. Try to keep your blanket on and I'll see you in the morning." He started to get up, but Barnaby tugged back, still holding his shirt.

"No..."

"No?"

"No."

That was the extent of the conversation. Something clicked in Kotetsu's brain and he felt no need to ask Barnaby to explain anything. He instead gently nudged Barnaby's hand away and turned so that his back was against the couch. He wasn't that comfortable. It didn't matter. Similar to how he had suddenly been awake, he felt tired as hell again.

Barnaby's hand draped limply over his shoulder. Kotetsu heard his even breathing and realized he had fallen back asleep. He hoped Barnaby wouldn't flip out in the morning. Kotetsu instantly frowned to himself; he knew Barnaby wouldn't react badly. He couldn't say how he knew it, he just did.

That night changed everything.

It wasn't actually that drastic, maybe, but Kotetsu woke up feeling that way and went through the day unable to shake it. He'd woken up with Barnaby's hand withdrawn, but his partner was still there sleeping on the couch. Kotetsu got up, did his thing, and soon Barnaby did too and they were getting ready to go to the training center. Everything was normal.

Except that he couldn't take his eyes off his partner.

Kotetsu had a few of those weird little moments in his life. With Antonio, he remembered sneaking some beer behind the academy and laughing, and as he fell on his ass he felt his first true hints of a friendship he would keep for life despite not being great at it all the time.

With Tomoe it was a Monday afternoon, at his house. They'd been going out for a long time and they were on the floor doing a puzzle together. Kotetsu had felt silly at first, but when Tomoe gave him sweet little pecks on the cheek for every piece that fit, he felt a certain warmth spreading through him and knew he wanted to spend his life with her.

Kaede was a common story, almost overtold, but the moment held true for Kotetsu – the moment her tiny hand wrapped around his finger was when he actually fully realized she was his daughter, knew he was a father and that he loved her more than he would have ever thought possible.

With Barnaby it was the hand clinging to his shirt in the dead of night and telling him not to leave.

Though he knew there was something between them, Kotetsu couldn't be sure that Barnaby actually felt it too, and that bothered him. So he didn't open his mouth, and just looked away if he saw Barnaby's glance shift toward him. He couldn't be caught staring.

But he still did. He was looking at his neck when someone wacked the back of his head and he realized he was just taking up space on a machine in the training center. Barnaby was nearby doing some stretches, and it was Antonio who had wacked him.

"You're not doing much. You sick?"

"You could have asked me that before you hit me," Kotetsu grumbled while rubbing the back of his head.

"I said your name twice. You've got this glazed over look."

Kotetsu just shrugged and he started to focus on Barnaby again.

Antonio subsequently smacked him again. "Kotetsu!"

"Ow! Look I'm working out, right?" he started moving his arms, lifting barely anything since he had failed to even adjust the weights.

"Ten pounds. Wow, you should go to some pro weightlifting."

Kotetsu scowled at Antonio and stood up. "Fine! I'll go do pushups!"

"You're going to forget what you're doing halfway through and fall on your face," Antonio suggested, which almost made Kotetsu laugh. It was sort of funny.

But he was a little too annoyed to even giggle. "Why would you say that?"

"Because you'll probably look at Barnaby, and every time I've seen you do that today you've kind of zoned out," Antonio said matter-of-factly. "I think tonight you need to come have a drink with me. Talk about stuff."

"Ah, maybe."

"Did something happen last night?" Antonio asked, in a tone that Kotetsu didn't like – a tone that hinted he had too much of an idea about what Kotetsu was thinking.

"No." Kotetsu knew what Antonio meant and also knew he was telling the truth by saying no. "Barnaby stayed overnight because it was late."

"And he was worried about you." Antonio sighed. "Kotetsu you know I have been aware of your issues for a while now, and Barnaby has made it clear he worries about you. This isn't hard for me to figure out. I know the basics, give me details."

"He just stayed over! Geez. I slept in my bed and he slept on the couch."

"Is that so?"

"Yup." Kotetsu crossed his arms defensively, because that was pretty much true. He was not about to explain the feelings that hit him hard in the middle of the night.

"Kotetsu…"

"Is he being annoying?" Barnaby's voice, he was standing behind him. "If Kotetsu's being annoying, don't worry, I'm about to take him away."

"Y-you are?" Kotetsu asked in a small voice and Antonio smirked. Kotetsu wanted to punch him.

"Uh huh. We have an interview. And then we have to keep an eye out for a criminal on the run. Lunatic already killed someone this month, we can't have that happen again so soon."

"Oh." Routine business. "Okay."

"Don't look so sad, Kotetsu," Antonio teased him.

Kotetsu turned red. "I was thinking about punching you, now I think I will," he said, making a fist. It wouldn't be the first time.

"Punching him? Calm down." Barnaby placed a hand on Kotetsu's lower back.

He dropped his hand immediately, fist and urge to punch Antonio all gone. "Barnaby, take care of Kotetsu today, he's looking a bit red," Antonio snickered.

"I'll hang out tonight, okay!" Kotetsu finally snapped.

"Sure. See you later." Antonio strolled off looking far too pleased with himself for getting his way.

As he left, Barnaby stepped in front of Kotetsu. "Wow, you are pretty red. Are you feeling okay?" he asked, gently holding the back of his hand to Kotetsu's forehead to see if he had a fever.

His hand lingered, and Kotetsu knew if what he was feeling was one sided then his life was quickly going to go to Hell.

The stupid whatever that Kotetsu felt for Barnaby was disruptive. He found that out pretty much right away, and like with everything that frustrated him he tried to ignore it. He was being stupid. He'd purposely tried to form a bond with Barnaby and let it go too far.

In an effort to keep that part silent he talked a little more at his appointments, but Kim knew he was keeping something. He could tell. "How are things with your partner?" she asked a few times.

Kotetsu would just nod and say 'good'. Sometimes he expanded on it as a cover-up of sorts, mention they had a good interview here or a tough criminal there. It was all true but he was leaving details out and she knew.

"Kotetsu, move," Barnaby said and Kotetsu tried to focus, tried to get into the position Barnaby had directed him too. The streets were wet from rain and thus Blue Rose was out with them, though she didn't seem very happy about it.

"Fine, fine…how long have we been out here?" Kotetsu asked with a sigh. Even inside his suit he swore he felt a chill.

"Not that long." Barnaby sounded annoyed.

"Do we even know where they are?" Blue Rose asked.

"No," Barnaby said, shaking his head.

They were outside of a museum, searching out a couple of NEXT thieves. One had a sticky substance on his hands and feet which he could use to cling to anything – including the sides of buildings. He wouldn't be too hard.

The other one had an obnoxious habit of turning into a bird.

Kotetsu wasn't sure how she managed that one, what that power even was, but he knew it was going to be frustrating. Sticky-man had a gun on him which wouldn't be too much trouble, but they did have to protect Blue Rose and that made them work much slower than normal. Not that either one blamed her, she was sort of forced out with them. The rain was a paper thin excuse, because it was clear her sponsor wanted her to get more publicity.

It happened frequently and while she insisted there was a good reason for it, she still argued whenever she was needlessly sent out.

Kotetsu wished the museum didn't have so many obstacles along the exterior. There were statues and displays, and it was hard to hide behind them. He was sure his suit was obvious. He was crouching behind a large elephant statue (with an all too pleased expression on its face) when he saw Sticky-man, as he had started to call him in his head, clinging to a fancy pillar that was near one of the corners of the building.

He quickly turned to motion at the others. They weren't looking. Kotetsu had to start a little game of glancing to the man, back to the other two, back to the man, trying to keep track of everyone. It felt like ten minutes had passed when Blue Rose looked at him, though in reality it was probably twenty seconds.

He made a karate chop motion with his hands and flailed with both pointer fingers in the direction of the man. Blue Rose stared, clearly having no idea what the hell he was trying to say, so he just slammed his face, or rather, mask, into his palm and pointed with one finger instead.

She crouched low, joining him where he was. She was a little bit too close and he wanted to flinch away, but there was no need for that. She saw Sticky-man quickly enough. She rolled her eyes, held out her hand, and ice went flying.

Well, she lost points for being subtle, to Kotetsu at least. But Sticky-man was no good at trying to escape the ice. He started to scramble up and let out a yelp of dismay when he found his hands did not indeed attach to the ice. He fell hard on his back and groaned, unable to move much.

He looked pretty hurt. "Blue Rose…"

She nodded, worried. "Yea, I know, I'll go check on him and make a call…" she bit her lip and started toward the man.

"She's taking after you." Barnaby's soft voice came from behind him and Kotetsu nearly hurt himself in an effort to spin around to face him.

"Oh?" he said proudly.

"Yea, she just didn't think. Shouldn't have taken him down while he was so far above ground."

"…Oh." Well, that made Kotetsu feel like crap. He sure hadn't stopped her. He hadn't even thought about the height.

"Let's just find his friend, okay?" Barnaby sounded worried, again.

"Um, yea." Why was he ALWAYS worried?

Kotetsu looked around desperately. He wanted to catch the criminal for Barnaby. That would make Barnaby worry less, right? And it would totally kind of impress him. Kotetsu heard a chirp to his left and looked in that direction immediately. There, sitting on one of the trees bordering the museum grounds was a fat little bluebird.

The only bird Kotetsu had seen or heard in hours, and even in the city they were common. As far as he knew, bluebirds only came out in the morning to sing. That's what he thought he remembered.

He stood up straight, smirking beneath his helmet. "I got it. Bunny, see that bird? I got this," he said confidently.

"Um, Kotetsu…"

"I need the points, you're so far ahead of me!"

"No, that's-"

Kotetsu was off before Barnaby could stop him. His powers activated, because he knew that catching a bird would be hard, regardless of whether or not it had human intelligence. Those things were fast! He nearly collided with the tree, and the criminal bird took flight. It started away from the museum.

"Trying to escape me!" Kotetsu yelled, still going after it.

It landed on a lamppost. He chased it. It got out onto the street and people tried to clear the way. Kotetsu was able to dodge them, sort of. The bird flew so erratically that it was difficult. Another lamp post. Then another tree. It tried to land in a bush, but he was too fast for that and it didn't even get to fold its wings.

Kotetsu found himself growing alarmed. His time ran low and he'd been chasing that bird everywhere. He had a minute left. He pushed harder, his hand stretched out as he caught up with the bird and became increasingly unaware of his surroundings. He almost had it, almost had it…

"YES!"

He grabbed the bird out of midair, careful not to crush it – and then crashed headfirst into a fancy fountain outside one of the banks in Stern Bild. Before Kotetsu hit it, it was a delicate white fountain with two levels of water streaming down it, decorated with stone deer around the edges of the second level.

After Kotetsu hit it, it was a pile of white rubble and a couple of decapitated stone deer heads.

And there was water, everywhere. Kotetsu could feel it getting into the parts of his suit that unfortunately, did have gaps.

But it didn't matter! He had the bird! Who wasn't changing back into a person in his hand, thank God! He stood up with a smile and started to call Barnaby, but before he could even get to that Barnaby called him first.

"Hi Bunny! I got her!"

"What?"

"I got her, the criminal!"

He heard some confusion on the other end, with a loud 'huh?' from Blue Rose. Barnaby sighed and spoke again. "Are you holding a person or a bird?"

"A…bird…"

"Well, congratulations Kotetsu. Not many people I know can catch a bird. But I've got a woman here who I managed to knock out after she flew over Blue Rose as a bird and…nevermind, but apparently her blue hair makes a good target…" He heard Blue Rose, protesting from the other end. Kotetsu would have liked to laugh, except he had a very bad feeling.

"So…I caught a bird and you caught the criminal."

"Correct. That in itself is not a big deal, I suppose, but did you destroy anything?"

Kotetsu laughed nervously, and Barnaby groaned.

Judge Petrov looked tired as hell. He also sounded tired, and was just plain irritable. Kotetsu thought that spelled trouble for sure, but to his surprise, Petrov was just too out of it to give much of a shit about the destruction of the fountain. He had mumbled something about dealing with more important things that and assigned Kotetsu some community service.

That was a new one.

Kotetsu later learned there was some reasoning behind it. HeroTV needed something to bring back viewers who had gotten disinterested, and seemingly more excited about the rare occasions that Lunatic would pop out of nowhere and kill someone. They needed to do something nice, something that showed they cared about the citizens a lot and that included things other than showing up at NEXT crimes.

Normally Kotetsu would have been all for some sort of charity work. It made him feel good to help everyone, one of the few tasks that genuinely made him happy without any sort of struggle. But he didn't like being forced to do it. It felt so…false, so showy and stupid. He would do his best in whatever situation they put him in but he knew people watching from the outside would just find it cheesy.

He was especially angered when he found out what they were doing: spending time with the patients at a children's hospital on the second level of the city. They would be visiting NEXT children specifically, who were seriously and terminally ill and it felt like a knife in Kotetsu's chest. He felt sick to be putting on such a show for the kids that had questionable futures or no future at all.

But, he would go. The patients didn't know it was a publicity stunt. He'd gotten letters from a couple of them before and had them saved in his apartment; two boys and a girl who said Tiger was their favorite hero and they wanted to meet him someday. He imagined Barnaby had similar letters.

As they prepared for their visit Kotetsu checked his hair disinterestedly in the mirror back at Apollon. "I hate this."

"What?" Barnaby asked, buttoning up a fancy shirt. Kotetsu had made a point of not watching him change.

"This whole…this whole thing. Having to please the viewers because they're distracted by Lunatic. Can't we just save people? Isn't that enough?"

"I guess not…but are you really upset about going to the hospital?" Barnaby gave him a confused look.

"No. I'm upset about why. Bunny, if I had thought of it sooner I would have made arrangements to actually visit those kids. What they have to deal with is too damn horrible to even try to make sense of. All I can think of is how many there are so sick they may not make it another year, and the studio? They see ratings." He scowled at the mirror and tried hard not to punch it.

"I don't think it's right either," Barnaby admitted. He usually liked the publicity stunts, though Kotetsu would have found it odd if he enjoyed the one they were about to deal with. "But that doesn't matter, does it? We'll visit them and forget about the studio for a while."

"Man, you have changed," Kotetsu mumbled though he was pleased.

"Hmmm?"

"Nothing. You're right Barnaby, I'm just…I…"

"I know." Barnaby put a hand on his shoulder.

Kotetsu calmed immediately again under Barnaby's touch. "Who was behind this anyway?"

Barnaby looked uncomfortable. "Maverick. Though I think I understand why he chose this, and I think while ratings are a plus that wasn't his real goal. He probably feels bad for them…he took care of me remember and…" he trailed off.

"I guess." Kotetsu put on his mask and hat. "You ready to go now?"

"Whenever you are," Barnaby said with a smile that made Kotetsu want to melt.

The ride over had Kotetsu kind of squished up next to Barnaby thanks to a car that was a bit too small and an unexpected hero going with them – Ivan had been asked to go as well and Kotetsu didn't understand why. He looked positively lost on the way over, and Kotetsu tried to make small talk with him while slowly resting more and more against Barnaby the whole time.

He was surprised when Barnaby didn't push him away, even as his head hit his shoulder. As such, Kotetsu didn't move away. He just got comfortable as he tried to get Ivan to talk.

Ivan seemed about as bad off as him and more obvious. He still had yet to recover from what happened with Jake and his pals. Ivan told them multiple times he felt guilty for it and like he should not have been a hero and how none of it would have happened if he had just helped Edward years ago. Kotetsu and Barnaby bother shared the idea that Jake at least would have gotten out anyway, but Ivan just could not be consoled. Kotetsu wondered if he would just bring the sick kids down.

He nearly fell sideways when they stopped and Barnaby got out of the car. Kotetsu caught himself with his elbow against the seat. Barnaby looked down at him with a raised eyebrow.  
"What are you doing?"

"Posing," Kotetsu answered cooly.

Barnaby just shook his head and walked away. Kotetsu quickly climbed out and then waited for Ivan who took as long as possible to get out of the car. To Kotetsu's surprise there weren't any cameras watching them go into the brick building. He supposed photographers would show up at the end asking them 'how they felt' and looking for tears in their eyes.

No one walked in with them either. Usually Agnes was around with whatever badge she needed to get into the event or building they wanted to go to. But no, it was just the three of them who walked in, signing some papers at the reception desk, and then being led to down a hallway on the first floor of the building. The medical exam and research rooms, anything like that were on the above floors. The kids who had to stay very long term were on the first floor, easier to evacuate in the case of an emergency. They would go to the playroom first, and then visit the bedridden patients.

The playroom was brightly colored with light blue as the main wall color, decorated with animals and cartoon objects and a lot of stickers. There were a variety of things in the room, art supplies, a trainset, stuffed animals, building blocks – the list went on. There were also some fire extinguishers and safety equipment locked in a case, which made him curious about the powers those kids showed.

Kotetsu didn't know what he had expected going in – in his head he thought it'd be like a daycare with a truckload of kids running around. That was a ridiculous idea of course but he still didn't know. There were about eleven of them in there. He didn't know if that was normal but figured if it was low that was because they were NEXTs.

The nurse who had escorted them was going to stay in the room. For a second Kotetsu wondered if it had to do with the fact that she didn't trust them, but then he realized that none of them were trained to deal with any sort of medical emergency should one pop up. So, they all three stood there at first before realizing they could go mingle with these kids and learn about them. They were fragile but not to the point that visiting meant just staring at them.

A couple of boys playing with a doll house shouted Barnaby's name. He smiled, and went over to them. Kotetsu watched awkwardly, unsure of where to start. Then he heard a soft female voice go "Tiger?"

He turned to his right to see a little girl, a bit younger than Kaede, holding a box of crayons and looking at him. She was thin, kind of lanky for a kid her age (or what he thought was her age). Her hair was short and blonde. He looked at her hazel eyes and noticed one was lazy. She wore a white shirt with a bear on it eating honey and some plaid style shorts that were lilac and light blue.

Kotetsu knelt down in front of her. "Wild Tiger, at your service," he said quietly with a little salute.

She kind of hid her face behind her crayons. "It's really you?"

"Really really."

He thought he saw a smile. "You're my favorite."

"I am!" he beamed back at her.

"Yea. You're funny. And you help everyone."

"Ha, well, I try! What's your name?"

"Miranda," she answered slowly, with a glance to the nurse as if to see if it was all right. The nurse nodded.

"Nice to meet you, Miranda," Kotetsu said extending his hand. She took it and he shook her hand very gently. She blushed as he did so. He itched to ask why she was in there but he doubted the kids really liked to talk about that. "So you're a NEXT?" he asked.

"Yes. When I turned um…turned four I started making light."

"Making light?"

She freed her hand from his and held it out, palm open. She focused on it and slowly a little light blue light began to emerge, like glowing ball in her hand. "Mom has me help her find things in the dark sometimes."

"Oh I see," Kotetsu said. Her body lit up too with a faint glow, but the light in her hand was very bright. "Bet you're not scared of the dark, huh?" he asked with a chuckle.

"No! ….But sometimes I am," she said, lowering her crayons.

"I used to be terrified of it," Kotetsu admitted to her.

"Really? But you're um, you're a hero!"

"I wasn't always."

"No?"

He laughed. "No. I was a little kid like you once. Anyone can grow up to be a hero," he said, omitting the fact that they had to be NEXTs.

"Even me?"

"Why not?" A voice in the back of his head said 'but what if she doesn't grow up?'. He hushed that inner voice, because even if the kids were there for a while, it didn't mean they were terminal. She might just be there for a while because she needed to be monitored.

She looked at the floor. "Because sometimes loud sounds scare me…and all I can do is make light."

He put a hand on her shoulder. "Well. You can learn how to deal with those sounds, and I think you'll find that your power would be incredibly helpful." Night missions, especially.

She nodded and they continued their talk for a long while before a little boy named Owen walked over to him. Kotetsu talked to him too, and watched as Barnaby seemed to have his own little fan following, a line of kids joining him with a little remote control robot. Kotetsu couldn't help but feel that Barnaby was kind of hogging the toy.

What was puzzling to him though was that he did not see Ivan. He didn't ask the nurse where he had gone, or Barnaby. Kotetsu wanted to keep his attention on anyone who wanted it, and at the moment that was Miranda and Owen. Before he knew it he was drawing green tigers with them. Their tigers were a bit better than his and they found that hilarious.

The kids were ushered out by two more nurses who came in – dinnertime they explained. Kotetsu looked at the clock – it had gotten late fast, an hour and a half had passed. Kotetsu had hardly noticed. When asked if he wanted to visit some of the bedridden patients he didn't hesitate to say yes. Barnaby looked a little unsure, but ended up saying yes as well.

They were informed they would not be able to see the kids with contagious diseases, because that risk was just too high. Heroes were not immune to illness. And if one of them got sick after visiting a kid there…it wouldn't bode well for the hospital.

Kotetsu did have mixed feelings about that. The last anyone he saw sick and restricted to a hospital bed was Tomoe. So, saying it was difficult to deal with seeing anyone in a hospital bed was an understatement. But at the same time he would have never wanted Tomoe to be lonely. And he felt the same way for anyone in her position, child or adult.

As they passed one room, Kotetsu had to stop in surprised. Barnaby crashed into his back and got annoyed until he saw what Kotetsu was looking at. Ivan was in one room sitting on the edge of a kid's bed. The kid was hooked up to a few different things, and looked to be a little boy. He had a small smile and his eyes were focused on Ivan – who actually looked pleased and relaxed.

"When did…" Kotetsu gave the nurse leading them a puzzled look.

"Well, he wanted to walk in the hallway a bit, I think the playroom was hard for him to deal with. He asked one of the other nurses if he could come in here after Luke waved at him and he's been there ever since. Luke is rarely happy. What you see him hooked up to is a peritoneal dialysis system."

"…Why?" Kotetsu blinked. Weren't those for old people? Adults at least?

"Kidney failure."

"I knew that but…nevermind." Again, he wasn't going to cross the line and ask about the exact nature of the kid's condition. He was happy, however, to see that Ivan formed some sort of bond with him in a short amount of time and it appeared to be comforting them both.

When they reached a room with a few beds in it, they started to socialize a bit – as best they could. Two of the kids were asleep and others disinterested. Kotetsu eventually found himself talking to a boy named Victor. He had shoulder length blonde hair and freckles. His eyes were big and blue. He wore a normal hospital gown with rubbed duck print on it, and talked very quietly.

"Can any NEXTs heal people?" he had asked Kotetsu when he walked nearby.

Kotetsu had stopped and answered, "I don't know. Probably."

They talked for a little while. Victor was six. He liked cars and rock music, and he wanted to be a racecar driver when he grew up. His NEXT ability had allowed him to teleport, but he was too sick to do that now. He told Kotetsu he was waiting for the doctors to fix his heart, like they had several times before. Kotetsu gave him a gentle pat on the head and they talked maybe five minutes more before Victor became tired and wanted to nap.

They did not stay there nearly as long as in the playroom. Soon the nurse was thanking them – just he and Barnaby. When Kotetsu saw Ivan again he was still with that boy and a man and a woman, probably Luke's parents. The nurse informed them that Ivan had wanted to stay. That was fine, and they both signed out to leave.

There was a car waiting for them, but… "Let's walk for a while," Kotetsu told Barnaby.

"Sure." Barnaby dismissed the driver. Kotetsu was surprised there were really no cameras or people around. It was a quiet evening. He waited for Barnaby to join him and they walked in silence for a while.

Kotetsu broke the silence. "That was tough," he admitted. "I'm glad we went, though."

"Me too…" Barnaby's voice sounded thick.

"Bunny?" Kotetsu turned as they continued, but Barnaby hid his face.

"I thought at first, I honestly thought it would be like any other visit we've done that included kids," Barnaby said and Kotetsu was a little surprised at that. "I don't know why I thought…but I did. But Kotetsu…"

"I know." Kotetsu stopped him. Barnaby didn't need to explain why he was sad, to even wonder would be ridiculous. While it was strange to see him cry, Kotetsu also knew Barnaby wasn't cold and emotionless like he acted. He wasn't always a show. He still cried, he still got sad.

"I feel so weird, though. It's like…I…Kotetsu can we go back to your place?"

"Sure."

"I think I'm going to stay over again."

"That's fine – are you crying?" he asked, and stopped walking. They were outside an office supply store by then and there still weren't many people out.

Barnaby immediately went to raise a hand and wipe his eyes. "N-no," he lied, failing miserably.

"Yes you are!"

"So I am! What's wrong with it!"

"Nothing, Bunny, nothing." Kotetsu took a few steps to place himself next to Barnaby and wrapped one arm around his waist. "I'm just not used to it."

"Oh." Barnaby paused, and shifted toward Kotetsu. "I…"

"You what?"

"…I don't know. I just feel like I should say something."

"Like what?"

"How that all made me feel, I guess. How did it make you feel?" he asked, looking at Kotetsu.

Kotetsu spoke without even thinking about it. "Made me realize how much I'd like to see my daughter."

"Then you should go see her."

"But Bunny, I can't take a day off…"

"Please plan for one soon. Kotetsu I would give anything to see one of my parents one more time. Go see her," Barnaby urged.

Kotetsu found it hard to admit that one reason he was hesitant was because he'd leave Barnaby alone. He wondered if Barnaby would be okay, and in a way was scared that being far away even for a couple of days would make his feelings for Barnaby less urgent and real. He didn't understand that. Why would he be scared of that? He would always feel as though Barnaby was his friend.

It was a dumb reason not to see his daughter. "I'll see what I can do. See if Maverick can pull some strings for me, will you?"

"Sure," Barnaby agreed. He leaned more into Kotetsu and then suddenly turned completely and wrapped his arms around him. It wasn't just a loose hug either; Barnaby had him in a tight grip.

Kotetsu paused before putting his other arm around Barnaby's upper body. "Bunny?"

"I'm okay," Barnaby reassured him. "I just…needed something only you can give."

"…Huh?" Kotetsu asked, his head spinning a little. Barnaby clenched the material of his shirt and said nothing. He didn't even fight it as Kotetsu carefully ran his fingers through his hair. They only separated when Kotetsu noted people were staring and a girl with a scarf kept snapping pictures.

The walk home was uneventful but pleasant regardless. Kotetsu felt sobered by the day's events, experience with individuals who had such worries in their young lives had made his whining and inability to deal with his own thoughts seem absolutely insignificant. His life was more than he made it out to be and he felt warmed by his time spent with Barnaby. He was growing ever closer to the young man.

Barnaby stayed over more. The hugging became a little more frequent, and after all his time of still feeling insecure with the therapist, staying locked up, he finally began to feel truly comforted by Barnaby being there. The 'mother hen' impression faded, replaced simply by 'worried friend'.

Things were looking up, and Kotetsu found himself particularly excited two weeks later when he had a sudden burst in his power. He jumped higher than he had ever jumped, ran faster than he had ever ran, both in one night.

Things were getting better and better!


	5. Run away with my soul

"He just kept bringing me tea! All night. My head hurt and my leg, hell that hurt even more. It was a good night with everything that happened, but that just topped it off. I know everyone thinks Bunny is nice because of how he treats the public and acts in front of the camera. And, okay, he is, but it's harder to see that about him when it's just us heroes, and then once you do he is just the sweetest person – his real smile is so much better than the one he shows everyone else. Oh, and before I went to bed he gave me a 'good night hug', which is a new one, but I'm not fighting it. Sometimes I don't understand how he can…oh…" Kotetsu smiled sheepishly from where he sat relaxing into the couch in Kim's office. "I was gushing, wasn't I?"

"Just a little," she admitted with an amused smile.

"Sorry. What were we discussing?"

"We WERE talking about your feelings in regards to your rank this season."

"Oh, yea…"

"But maybe we need to discuss your partner."

Uh oh. He's lost control and gone babbling and while it wasn't the first time, it was certainly the most he'd said in one session. "Um no, we don't have to. Anyway I ranked fourth and honestly it doesn't bother me, it's good just to see Bunny do well and get the thanks he deserves…aw crap." He couldn't get off the topic of Barnaby! It was annoying.

"Well, it's a relief to see your ranking doesn't bother you. I think you've been making good progress Kotetsu. I was worried you would be feeling bad after the numbers came out."

"Ah, I never cared about the numbers. I just…"

"Needed to feel wanted. Wanted to feel needed."

"Yes." He could feel his cheeks heat up. Talking about his feelings again – it was still difficult.

"You certainly are both of those, especially in regards to Bunny."

Kotetsu felt a twinge of possessiveness, which in turn alarmed him, but he couldn't help himself. "Kim? Please, can you just call him Barnaby? Bunny is sort of my…"

"Oh." She nodded. "I'm sorry Kotetsu. I understand."

"That's not bad sign or anything, is it?"

"Not at all! You have your own term of endearment for him and would prefer it if no one else used it. That's perfectly fine Kotetsu."

"Oh," he relaxed, and tried to reflect on the point she was getting at. "I guess I am. He likes being around me lately. I have some of his clothes and a toothbrush and some books he likes at my apartment for when he stays over. I wish I had another bed for him instead of the couch. He never seems to mind it though."

Kim nodded but didn't say anything immediately. She scribbled some notes down. "So you would say, things have come a long way since he told you that you were unneeded back at the stadium?"

Kotetsu's smile faded. As hurt and broken as that made him back then, thinking of it had become more painful when he started realizing what Barnaby meant to him. "Can we not talk about that?"

She gave him a sharp look as if to remind him of exactly where he was.

"I guess yes, things have changed a lot. He doesn't seem like the same Bunny I met."

"You were attached to him from the beginning, and still are. The change hasn't made you feel lost? It's been positive?"

Barnaby was with him all the time. He made Kotetsu feel like he was important, he had a reason to go on living other than Kaede. Even though he knew he should live solely for his daughter, he craved a companionship that she could not provide. "Extremely," he answered softly. "I…" Couldn't imagine life without him. That's what he almost added, but he wasn't prepared for what Kim might ask if he said that. He didn't trust himself to be okay with just imagining it anyway.

"How about your other friendships?"

Those he felt guilty about. He'd hardly spent time with Nathan and Antonio. He hadn't worked on any relationships with his co-workers, not really, even if he saw them often. Sometimes he talked to Ivan, actually. Ivan had a lot of the same issues he did, and wasn't seeing a therapist. "I haven't been hanging out with much of anyone else lately."

Kim frowned. "I see. Kotetsu, I'd like you to work on life outside Barnaby. You can't cling to him as a life support. It's unfair to both of you. Continue with your friendship…or whatever…by all means. But don't lose your other friends. As they say, 'Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the others are gold'."

Kotetsu nodded. He understood and actually, a night drinking or doing whatever with Antonio and Nathan would be nice. He'd likely invite Barnaby, but simply being around other people had to be a step forward. "Sure."

She smiled again and stood up. "Well Kotetsu, our time is up but I think we've had a productive session today. This is the happiest I've seen you."

"Really?"

"Yes. There's still a lot to work on, but I think we're finally getting on the right path here."

"Great!" Kotetsu stood up to go.

"I will see you in two weeks. You can tell me any changes and well, we'll go from there."

Kotetsu nodded and said goodbye before walking out of the room. He felt fantastic!

He felt even better when he left the building and there was Barnaby waiting for him with their double chaser. Barnaby was dressed casually and Kotetsu was relieved he wasn't being picked up for a call. It was dark out by then and chilly.

"Hey, Bunny!" he yelled, waving like an idiot from the steps in front of the door before hurrying down them.

Barnaby rolled his eyes, but he looked happy. "Hello, Kotetsu."

"You came to pick me up!"

"Something like that. Want to go star-gazing? We can get outside the city and the sky should be clear."

"Star gazing?" That was new.

"If you don't want to, I understand. I don't know why, but it just sounded nice."

"It does." The chill he felt from the air outside escalated a bit but he supposed he could brave the cold and spend some time with Barnaby. Nothing sounded better than that really. So, he climbed into the sidecar. "Let's go!"

Barnaby said nothing. He started the engine and took off and Kotetsu realized immediately that maybe going driving in the cold air at night was not the best idea without their suits or at least thick jackets. He had his brown coat but it wasn't really enough. The wind hit his eyes and he had to close them. He just tried to curl into himself and stay warm for the ride.

Stupid attraction to Barnaby making him all cold.

He was so SO thankful when they came to a stop outside the city, on a hill that sort of overlooked it. It was a beautiful view, Kotetsu realized as he managed to open his eyes. But the view Barnaby was looking at was even better, and Kotetsu leaned back to see the bright spots of light that covered the dark canvas of sky.

"I used to do this sometimes…Maverick brought me up here so I could get out of the city."

"Star gazing with Maverick?" Kotetsu chuckled and shivered.

"Yes…what?"

"Sorry, it's just funny to me! Not exactly someone I'd take out to see the stars with me!"

"Well I don't now," Barnaby stressed. "It was just something we used to do when I was little…so who would YOU take to see the stars, Kotetsu?"

"My daughter, or just…someone I love."

"I see." Barnaby went quiet and Kotetsu looked for Orion's Belt.

He wondered who Barnaby would take with him. He would take Kotetsu obviously, but what did that even mean? Maybe Barnaby just saw it as a way to bond with his friend, or he wanted to relive memories, or….something. Well, if he'd wanted to do that, he could have picked sometime warmer. Kotetsu shivered more. He was caught between asking Barnaby if they could leave to get warm, and keeping his mouth shut so they could enjoy the time together.

"How was your appointment tonight?" Barnaby asked quietly, after a few minutes of silence.

"Oh…it was good, actually." Kotetsu tried to sugarcoat the truth most of the time, even if Barnaby saw right through it. But he was able to be honest there because it had been a good session.

"What did you talk about?"

Kotetsu shrugged, having to fib that part a little. "My ranking, and my friends. Nothing very deep actually. It was pleasant-t-t," he said, unable to keep from chattering his teeth a bit.

"Are you cold?"

"…Yea, kind of…" He felt bad for being cold, which was ridiculous, but he couldn't help it.

Barnaby did nothing for a minute, and then he slid off of his chaser. "Sit in my seat."

"Why?"

"Just do it, Kotetsu."

Kotetsu wanted to open his mouth so he could complain and protest and all that but he wanted to be warm even more. Barnaby had to have idea up his sleeve (how was HE warm in that stupid white and red jacket?), so Kotetsu decided to trust him.

He climbed from his chaser onto Barnaby's. The seat was warm. That didn't help. "Bunny, I'm afraid seat warming doesn't work the way you'd like it to."

"Pfft, old man, I'm not that stupid. Move forward."

Kotetsu didn't get it at all, but he moved forward as much as he comfortable could. "There."

"Good. Now just trust me."

That sounded sort of ominous. Kotetsu watched Barnaby and his eyes went wide with surprise when Barnaby started climbing right back into that seat, though sitting behind Kotetsu. "Bunny?"

"If…if this doesn't help, tell me and we can go home." Barnaby moved forward as he tugged lightly on Kotetsu's arm, trying to get him to lean back. Kotetsu did, his mind racing as his back was against Barnaby's chest, his partner's arms surrounding and holding him.

It was clearly not just about keeping him warm. As if Barnaby holding him wasn't a sign in itself, it was the way Barnaby squeezed him, the way Barnaby's cheek rested on his shoulder. Kotetsu was tense, nervous, surprised, several feelings at once. He had only hoped his feelings would be returned, speculated on Barnaby's behavior – he had absolutely no clue how to respond when something he'd hoped so much for actually happened.

Luckily Barnaby broke the silence. "Kotetsu? …Are you still cold?"

Oh yea, the reason they were like that to begin with. Barnaby's body was quite warm. "No," Kotetsu said and reddened at the way that it came out sounding like hardly more than a whisper. He let out a sigh and made himself relax against Barnaby, immediately glad that he did. The whole thing was…cozy. "I'm definitely not cold. Thanks, Bunny."

"Ah…you're welcome." Barnaby paused before speaking again. "Maverick asked me to come over and have tea with him tonight. I told him no because I wanted to pick you up. He seemed annoyed."

"Let him be annoyed. I'm happy you showed up and that….we came out here."

"Yes…yes I'm happy too. I'll make it up to him with tea some other time." Barnaby's voice was so gentle, sweet so close to his ear. Kotetsu wondered what would happen if he just turned and kissed him but decided against it.

"Mmm…" Kotetsu didn't know what to say so he allowed himself to lean back just a little bit more, feeling Barnaby's grip adjust. His head fell back against Barnaby's shoulder, their cheeks nearly touching. The chill was completely gone and Kotetsu shut his eyes so he could take in all the physical contact.

After thinking about it a little he reached for one of Barnaby's hands and pried it off him to squeeze it. Barnaby squeezed back and Kotetsu brought both their hands up to rest on his chest. Then he didn't move, content to listen to Barnaby's breathing and the sounds from the city.

Kotetsu lost track of how long they were there. He nearly fell asleep, except that he felt a shiver run through Barnaby's body. He cracked one eye open. "Bunny you're cold."

"No…"

"Yes you are." As much as he hated to sit up and away, and he loathed it, he didn't want Barnaby to get cold too.

"Maybe a little," Barnaby admitted and Kotetsu half turned so he could see him. Barnaby's eyes were half closed and when he couldn't hold Kotetsu, his arms crossed over himself to stay warm. Kotetsu reached for him and laid his palm against Barnaby's cheek which felt ice cold.

"Bunny! You really are cold. Come on, let's go home and get you warmed up, okay?" Kotetsu didn't want to, but he made himself slide back down into his own chaser. If he didn't move it would be harder for them to get anywhere.

"Home?" Barnaby asked hesitantly.

"My place," Kotetsu remedied, and Barnaby nodded. He started up his chaser and off they went.

Getting through their first call the next day was difficult, far more difficult that he had imagined. It was so simple: go catch the NEXT who liked to make cars and large pieces of machinery smash into buildings and sometimes, people. Which meant using their powers. And…and that was about it. Get some shit out of the way and then go arrest the nutcase.

Kotetsu was so busy thinking of the night before that he almost got offed by a shiny black car with a license plate that read 'rum4u'. He flattened himself against a wall as Agnes raged at him for nearly getting killed on camera. Kotetsu ignored her.

The night before, nothing really happened when they got back. At the same time, it felt like a lot had. They'd gone inside and gotten themselves tea. Barnaby seemed to still have a chill so Kotetsu dug out his thickest blanket and wrapped it around him, holding him tightly at the same time. He again had to make himself hold back from placing any sort of kiss on Barnaby, even though he was so soft and so gorgeous. Barnaby had looked sad to go back to the couch, and Kotetsu was sad going up to the bed alone though he highly doubted it was any sort of good idea to suggest sleeping in the same bed when he still didn't know anything for sure. He did make a show of laying two more blankets on top of Barnaby after he laid down. Barnaby seemed vaguely annoyed but soon enough he just smiled and closed his eyes and said good night.

It was so hard not to just scoop him back up and into his arms.

Kotetsu was behaving like a lovestruck teenager and he knew it – especially as a wrecking ball came flying at him.

"Shitshitshitshit!" he ran before finally just jumping to the side and dodging the thing as it flew after him. It was a crisp, cool day, not as cold as the night before but still not warm. And yet he felt hot and sweaty in his suit. He preferred Barnaby's body heat more than…sweating due to a wrecking ball.

"Kotetsu!"

"Bunny?" Barnaby came in out of nowhere, landing in front of Kotetsu. Before them was a parking lot of cars, like a minefield leading them to the NEXT who was standing there laughing and thinking he was just soooo hilarious. Kotetsu disagreed.

"Activate, on the count of three! One…Kotetsu!"

Kotetsu's suit already lit up. "Sorry, I didn't hear anything after 'activate'," Kotetsu said, feeling dumb.

"It's fine. Let's go!" Barnaby took off towards the lot, with Kotetsu following behind in his trademark awkward-run.

The cars chasing them around was fun in a way, like a very dangerous obstacle course. Kotetsu kind of enjoyed tossing a car here and there and dodging them. He had quite a few to get through, too, including a school bus and a couple of semi's that managed to fit.

"Are you almost done wrestling with that truck? We don't have much time left!"

Oops, he was down to thirty seconds. And they were almost there, but Kotetsu really needed to stop fooling around. The truck's engine revved dangerously and the blue aura around the NEXT flashed incredibly bright for that moment. Then Kotetsu tossed the thing aside. "Okay I'm ready!"

They flew at the NEXT. All that stood between them was an ice cream truck of all things. And it didn't really stand in front of them – it drove right at them. Barnaby dodged so fast that he left a glowing pink streak from his suit's lights.

As for Kotetsu, he suddenly found himself moving slowly, the blue around his body fading as the strength and speed left him so quickly. It almost felt violent and painful which was a first. He tried not to dwell on that as he jumped out of the path of the truck, which drove a little farther until it almost smashed into the bus and a couple other cars. The thing turned and quickly started barreling toward him again. Kotetsu hurried to get out of the way, but it was difficult with nothing to hid behind and no speed. He heard it, coming closer and closer and closer-

He heard it screech to a halt, and turned to look. The truck just sat there, lights blinking on and off while the melody played to entice children over to buy treats played off-key enough to freak him out a little. Kotetsu shuddered and looked for Barnaby. There he was, holding an unconscious man and flipping a thumbs up for the camera.

Kotetsu was perplexed. He had such extreme powers a few days prior during a very routine call. Out there on the lot where those would have counted…they quit early. The same thing had happened with the power boost, his everything ended early, but he hadn't worried. Maybe he had cause to.

The good thing was no one was mad at him. Barnaby thought he was trying to keep the cars away from him while he captured the criminal. The cameras had been on Barnaby too, so no one really saw what was going on with Kotetsu as he dashed around. He was a little bitter about it, sure, but relieved.

As they left the lot, reporters shoved microphones in their faces, and a variety of small cameras turned on the both of them.

"I wish I'd had a power boost like the other day! Man I was so cool so amazing! Super jumps and everything," he told one newswoman. "But today it wasn't like that. So I sort of-"

"He kept the truck off of my butt, let me tell you," Barnaby said suddenly, an arm going around Kotetsu's shoulders. It was very clumsy and awkward with them in their suits, but Barnaby didn't care and he dragged Kotetsu closer to him. "Tiger is the best partner anyone could have. I wouldn't fight with anyone else by my side."

Kotetsu was glad he still had his helmet down because he was sure he was a shade of red that would make something think he needed a doctor. "Y-yea. Nah Bunny, you're the best partner!"

"No, you," Barnaby insisted and before Kotetsu could protest it, the newswoman was laughing and asking them about their points, since Barnaby was close to breaking Legend's record. Kotetsu fell silent, grateful for the change in subject.

He went home alone that night, exhausted. He'd wished Barnaby was with him but Barnaby went to have tea with Maverick to make up for missing it the night before. Kotetsu could get through a night himself, but given the events of the previous night he really wanted to see where their next night together would end up. Maybe nowhere, but it would have been nice to know.

As he sat in front of his television, his phone rang. Kotetsu lunged forward for the thing thinking it might be Barnaby. He opened the phone and saw it was Ben. Kotetsu hadn't heard from his old sponsor in a while and a grin appeared on his face as he answered. Well then, a conversation with his old friend, that sounded like a good evening after all.

'How could this happen to me?'

"Your powers might be declining. It happens for some NEXTs, and no one knows why. They experience a sudden burst of power and then it all starts to go."

Ben had seen him on the television, a clip on the news from when Kotetsu talked to the reporters outside of the parking lot. When he called that evening, all he had was bad news for Kotetsu.

"Your powers went earlier than usual today, didn't they? I saw dodging that truck. If Barnaby hadn't grabbed that guy in time…"

Kotetsu would have been roadkill.

He went to bed soon after the call even though he didn't really sleep. He stared at the ceiling for a while, then turned on his side. He felt miserable. Everything had been going so well and he…he was losing the one thing in the world that made anyone care that he existed at all, the only reason he even had friends. Worse, he couldn't tell anyone! It was embarrassing. Not only that, but he didn't want the others giving him special treatment at their own risks. No one wanted that kind of weight on their shoulders; a blundering fool who couldn't protect himself.

That's what he amounted to. Kotetsu curled into a ball and wished he could just disappear.

As luck had it he was able to fall asleep and a dreamless sleep at that. He was woken by his alarm the next morning and he'd already dragged himself out of bed before he remembered the conversation last night. If he'd remembered before he got up he would have just stayed in bed. What good was he anyway?

But instead he forced a banana down so he had some form of breakfast, and went out to buy coffee before he got to work.

The training center was normal. Everyone was normal. All that was different was the secret he kept. That could destroy everything, he told himself. He tried to get on a machine to lift weights, but ended up sitting there in his shorts, staring at his hand.

"Kotetsu."

He looked up to see Barnaby and a smiled a little. Even if he felt awful he might drag him down, seeing Barnaby made him so, so happy. Besides, he had to smile. If he didn't, he was unprepared for any questions that might be asked. "Hi, Bunny. How was your evening?"

"Fine, I guess. I got there and didn't end up having any tea. Maverick was mad at first, I think, because he made it special for me, but I'm so used to having it with you now. It seemed…wrong."

Kotetsu blinked. "Oh…Bunny he's your er…guardian? Or whatever. Nothing wrong with having tea with him."

"Yes, of course, I know."

"Good." Kotetsu started to attempt working out, since he had been distracted from zoning out at his hand.

"I really missed you."

Maybe he was just not destined to work out that morning. Kotetsu turned again to Barnaby. "Yea?"

"Of course!" Barnaby immediately looked miffed that Kotetsu would question it, even with one little word. "I wanted to go over but I didn't know if you'd be awake when I left Maverick's…"

"I should just give you my passcode and a key," Kotetsu chuckled. "Then you can come in anytime you please."

"You wouldn't mind?"

"Not at all."

"I…"

"Bunny?"

"That's…kind of a big…thank you," Barnaby settled on though he looked lost.

Kotetsu stood up with a laugh so he could give Barnaby a short hug. After all, they missed out on that the night before. Barnaby clung to him and for several moments Kotetsu wondered if he would let go. He did, though, and they looked at each other. Barnaby opened his mouth, but then his gaze traveled off to the side, and Kotetsu scratched the back of his head awkwardly.

Barnaby finally started to talk. "So Kotetsu, I know you'll agree…we should talk about what we-"

The obnoxious clanging ring of their call bracelets went off. Kotetsu heard them all across the gym which reminded him he was not alone with Barnaby.

"Bonjour, heroes!" Agnes's voice completely broke through the feelings clouding Kotetsu's mind, and he sighed, waiting for her to continue. "We've got some gang trouble! Lots of guns, lots of explosives, lots of people, lots of possibilities for ratings! I need you all to get ready. They are scattered between a few different buildings."

She began to give her orders on who was to go where, and Kotetsu's mind was back on his declining powers.

"BASTARD!" Kotetsu's wire attached to Lunatic and he pulled the creep towards him, almost getting knocked over when Lunatic nearly flew into him.

"So you're Wild Tiger," Lunatic said, and he sounded somewhat amused. "So hero, you're ready to save the lives of these rats?" he asked, indicating the gang members around them.

A couple had lived due to Barnaby and Pao-lin acting fast. Most had died, or were going to die. Antonio and Nathan tried their best but anyone Kotetsu saw them work on died anyway. Lunatic killed them. He just killed them.

Kotetsu had seen more horrible things, mass death that made him want to go home and drink himself into oblivion. But he had never become jaded to it, and he had tears down his cheeks as he thought about the men killed. "I would have saved them so that the court could decide their fates. You can't just take someone's life!"

"Why not? They took several lives. An eye for an eye, an arm for an arm," Lunatic responded, his voice strangely calm as he stayed held by the wire, not struggling.

"That's not how justice works!" Kotetsu roared at him, reaching out for his neck even if he intended to do nothing.

"Why not? Shouldn't it be that way? Why let these murderers stay alive and warm and fed in jail?"

"Jail is a horrible place!"

"Jail is a place to keep scum because you believe they can be saved."

"That's…no!" Kotetsu protested, his hand loosely on Lunatic's neck by then.

Lunatic shoved at him, hard, with his flames erupting from his hand at the same time. Kotetsu yelped and knew he had to back off. He could feel that heat. He doubted Lunatic had any desire to cook him, but he wasn't going to find out.

"You don't even have a good reason as to why they should live other than they shouldn't die for their crimes. That's not much of a reason." Lunatic turned and aimed his bow, and Kotetsu immediately saw the target – a wounded man with a gun, wearing the gang's bloody rose symbol. He was trying to get away.

Instead he'd be burnt alive or arrested. Kotetsu hoped for the latter and he took off, thinking he could likely outrun the flame and snatch the guy up.

Except that's not what happened. Again, his lights dulled, and he was moving slowly, clumsily. "Ack!" He nearly tripped. Then he heard a scream and looked to see the man on fire. "No! No no no!" Kotetsu got there as fast as his normal pace could carry him, but the man was already dying.

The flames went out and Kotetsu felt ill. The man looked like a man still, but his skin was burnt, the smell of burning flesh penetrated Kotetsu's nose and mouth even through the suit. The man screamed and screamed. He was in obvious agonizing pain. Kotetsu dropped down next to him. "It…it's okay. You…we can take you…hospital…" Even as he tried to utter the words he knew the man would be gone in seconds. All because of him. Because he was pathetic and losing his powers and the man's death was his fault.

Kotetsu shook inside his suit as he watched the man die. He was helpless, of no use as he collapsed with his last dying, horrible sounding breaths. His flesh was ruined, ugly, and Kotetsu had to look away. But he couldn't leave the body either. He slumped down, his mind blanking as he continued to shake.

He had no idea how long he was there. He'd completely shut down, again.

"There's nothing we can do here." Strong arms lifted him up as Barnaby's voice began to bring him back.

"Is he okay in there?" Nathan's voice.

"Kotetsu, open your helmet," Barnaby ordered as he continued to support Kotetsu.

"Oh…" Kotetsu opened his helmet, not quite ashamed enough to try and hid his sweaty, tear-streaked face. He felt dizzy and sick to his stomach. The last thing he wanted to do was throw up in front of anyone.

"Hell Kotetsu, you are pale! We need to get you back to the training center," Antonio said. The worry on his face was clear.

"Woah!" Nathan raised his hand to his mouth as he took a look at Kotetsu. "Darling, you look terrible." He reached for Kotetsu's face, pressing his palm to his cheek. "Your skin feels clammy. Maybe we should call an ambulance."

"No…" Kotetsu protested. He didn't want to be in a hospital. He wanted to be at home in his bed and unconscious to the world around him.

"Let's get him to the training center first and see how he is," Barnaby suggested. "Kotetsu, can you walk?"

No. He felt too dizzy. But Kotetsu nodded.

Somehow, he was able to walk as far as the Apollon transport and get in. Barnaby got out of his suit as Antonio and Nathan aided Kotetsu in taking off his own. Then they had him laid out on the couch in his undersuit by the time Barnaby came in.

"It wasn't your fault." Nathan's fingers weaved through Kotetsu's hair. "Your time ran out before you could get there. You tried, Kotetsu."

"Without you that guy wouldn't have had anyone looking out for him. You didn't make it, a lot of us didn't make it to those guys in time. This shit happens, Kotetsu." Antonio leaned against the wall across from them, his helmet off.

Nathan frowned and looked over his shoulder at Antonio. "A little tact, please?"

"What did I say wrong! Come on, I'd feel safe fighting by Kotetsu's side anytime. It's like I said, shit happens." Antonio snorted and crossed his arms.

Nathan looked like he wanted to argue, but he shrugged. "He's right, Kotetsu. I know it's not that simple, but he is right."

"Thanks," Kotetsu muttered. His eyes darted to Barnaby as soon as he came within viewing range.

Barnaby looked at Nathan, who met his gaze. The two men watched each other briefly, and then Nathan slowly stood up and backed up a few steps. Barnaby dropped down beside Kotetsu, stroking his hair gently. "Kotetsu…"

"Bunny I tried."

"After this long in the business, seeing someone die still makes you break down."

Kotetsu cringed. "I know it's pathetic."

"No." Barnaby's other arm went over Kotetsu's chest and he lowered his face closer to Kotetsu's. "It's admirable."

"Huh?"

"You haven't started to accept it as just something that can happen, something that happens on the job. Death is sad." Barnaby paused and Kotetsu had an idea he was struggling with his words because he thought of his parents. "To downplay it would be horrible."

"Handsome is right." Nathan sighed. "Not that I've become jaded to it, or Antonio-"

"Damn right," Antonio muttered.

"We're both sad about the men who died. We just handle it differently," Nathan said.

"Because life goes on." Antonio stood up, away from the wall. "Kotetsu, I'm not sure what else to say," he admitted.

"Antonio…" Kotetsu looked at his friend as Barnaby shifted slightly out of the way.

"What?" Antonio looked at him.

"Thanks," Kotetsu said. "Honestly, thanks."

Antonio nodded and then glared as Nathan pushed on his arm. "He's heard us. I think it's best we leave him with Handsome now," Nathan explained.

Barnaby slowly looked at Nathan again as Antonio made his way out of the van, which was still parked.

"He's in your hands now. Take good care of him," Nathan said, his tone serious. Kotetsu wondered if it was about more than their current topic. Barnaby just nodded and Nathan left as well.

As soon as they were both gone, Barnaby turned back and rested his head on Kotetsu's chest, his fingers rubbing gently against his scalp. He didn't say anything. Kotetsu managed to raise an arm and put it around Barnaby, but that was it. He felt worn out. Barnaby being there with him was the only reason he felt like staying awake at that moment. He barely noticed as the van's engine started and they actually moved.

He sort of wished Barnaby would say something, but he stayed there with his head on Kotetsu, fingers moving slowly. Maybe it was for his own good. Kotetsu didn't want to talk about it and Barnaby not forcing that calmed him down a little – which made him realize he hadn't completely shut down but his mind was certainly trying to escape.

Eventually Barnaby did get up, and at first he left without a word, going to find the driver it looked like. When he returned he coaxed Kotetsu to his feet. He handed him his clothes and helped him unzip the undersuit, then turned away to give Kotetsu some privacy as he dressed.

Kotetsu really wouldn't have cared if Barnaby watched. They'd seen each other in various states of undress plenty of times, especially when rushing for a call. But Kotetsu supposed it was a little different to see someone undressed when all you wanted to do was touch and kiss them. He wasn't even thinking of that in a sexual way, but it still brought on the embarrassment. He didn't merely 'suppose', even, he knew from being with Tomoe.

The transport stopped not far from his apartment. Kotetsu gave him a puzzled look to which Barnaby responded. "I didn't want to waste time going back to the center. But dropping us off right at your apartment wouldn't be a good idea so…can you walk a few blocks?"

Kotetsu nodded, and let Barnaby lead him out.

They walked in silence to his apartment, Kotetsu lagging every now and then. Each time Barnaby slowed and waited for him. They got to his apartment without incident and Barnaby made Kotetsu get changed for bed while he made him tea. Kotetsu was tired. The ridiculous thing about it all was that it wasn't even night time. They'd been out for hours dealing with the gang stuff, but it was still only close to evening. Kotetsu was exhausted mentally and physically though.

He made it to his bed and flopped down momentarily. Barnaby showed up before he could pass out and he handed him tea with a nice familiar taste that Kotetsu couldn't place. "It smells good," Kotetsu commented as Barnaby sat on the bed.

"Lavender. It's lavender. It should help."

"You're more familiar with tea than I could ever be…"

"It's not like tea is on your mind much."

"That's true." He sipped at the tea. It didn't taste as good as it smelled but he did feel himself relax as he got through the cup. He got halfway through before he realized he didn't want to finish. He set it on his nightstand. "Bunny I just want to sleep."

"Then lay down," Barnaby said softly.

Kotetsu nodded and slid back down so he was on his back. Barnaby was staring at him. "What…?"

"I…" Barnaby's face reddened. "Is it okay if I…do you mind…"

Kotetsu moved over. "Yea, you can join me."

Barnaby blinked, but moved quickly. He was still in his jeans and black shirt, not dressed to sleep like Kotetsu, but that didn't matter. He flopped down on the bed and rolled on his side to hug Kotetsu.

Kotetsu turned to face him. "We have to talk about this, don't we?"

"Probably."

He wondered if they did, though. What was there to even talk about? Barnaby appeared to feel the same as him, they were always together, they knew each other so well that normally they didn't always have to communicate…it was more complex than that though. Kotetsu wasn't stupid. He knew that.

He was losing his powers. He didn't deserve love from anyone, and yet there was Barnaby holding tightly to him and treating him like he mattered. And if he mattered to him and to Kaede, that should be enough. He self-sabotaged enough to know that again, it wasn't that easy. He couldn't tell Barnaby about his powers. Or maybe he could but…not then. Not for a while. He couldn't always hide it, but he could delay the knowledge from getting out.

"What are you thinking about?" Barnaby asked and Kotetsu realized he'd been staring.

"Oh uh, you…what happened today…you…" He was suddenly very aware of his words and not wanting to sound like his usual stupid self.

"Don't let today eat at you." Funny thing to hear from Barnaby, in a way. But Kotetsu let him continue. "I know you've been doing better. Don't let today destroy that. I don't like it when you hurt I…you don't deserve that."

"Bunny…" Kotetsu couldn't help himself. He leaned his head towards Barnaby's, nudging with his nose. Barnaby looked at him and angled his head, allowing Kotetsu to kiss his lips. It wasn't some deep passionate kiss, no prying Barnaby's mouth open with his tongue or anything like that. It was wonderful though, to feel Barnaby's soft lips against his own. That kiss became two, then three, four, and they both deemed it enough for the time being. Kotetsu's head felt clouded, in a good way. The bad feelings he felt moments before were dulled by the pure affection he felt for Barnaby.

Barnaby pressed closer still and rested his head against Kotetsu's shoulder. "If I could take away the sadness you feel, I would in an instant."

Kotetsu didn't know what to say to that. His heartbeat quickened and he tried to form a response. "I know," was all that came out.

He felt a light kiss pressed against his neck. "I'll do whatever I can, standing by your side."

Again, he didn't know what to say. It was hard to know how to react to such words, such affection from someone when it had been so long. "I'm lucky to have you." It just popped out, and Kotetsu wondered about that, since his luck had been going down the drain. But when it came to Bunny, that was true. He was extremely lucky and maybe if he could just keep that in mind he would be okay.


	6. Run away with my love

Anyone who ever said love fixes all was a liar.

Kotetsu wished like hell he was happier being with Barnaby. He wished it would just make his problems go away. Who could be sad while dating Barnaby? It was ridiculous.

The truth was that he did feel beter with Barnaby, but there was still a part of him that felt he didn't deserve him. His mood drifted that way quite often and if he was in bed with Barnaby he would wrap him tighter in his arms, mentally asking, begging even, that he would never find out how pathetic Kotetsu was and leave.

He hid his decline in powers well enough, and at the end of each day if he was alone, he'd write in a journal. His recent visits to Kim had not gone very well, and she asked him to keep that journal. He wasn't sure about it at first, because what if someone found it? Then again, the only one he ever had over was Barnaby and he didn't poke around in Kotetsu's stuff. If he wanted to see something, learn more about anything Kotetsu owned, he just asked.

He asked Kotetsu how he was doing. He scolded him as he had to throughout the day yet joined him nearly every night, always with a soft smile and gentle touches. They had never gotten to 'talking about it'. Every now and then Kotetsu mentioned it, they agreed they should, and the never did. Kotetsu decided to drop it. Weeks into a relationship was sort of beyond the accepted time limit of 'talking about it'.

"Hey, you have to get up."

Kotetsu tried to ignore him and buried his face in Barnaby's bare chest instead. The fans were right in their speculation – it was really a pretty nice place to be.

Barnaby sighed. "Kotetsu…"

"No." Barnaby couldn't talk anyway. He still had an arm around him and had made no move to pull away and actually get up.

"You need to. We have a lot of interviews today. And a swimsuit shoot."

"You mean you have a swimsuit shoot."

"I mean we. Did you even look at the schedule?" Barnaby asked, his hand lazily rubbing up and down Kotetsu's back.

"Me? In a swimsuit?" Kotetsu asked, intrigued and disturbed at the same time. Why? Barnaby was the eye candy. He was just some side muscle that usually broke things.

"Why not? You aren't bad to look at, you know."

Kotetsu's cheeks turned red and he wondered if Barnaby could feel the heat of his blush. It was strange, the way Barnaby would tell him that he was cute, tell him that he was good looking. He wondered just when he'd start calling him sexy, because that he was a little scared of.  
Relationships meant sex, physical attraction meant sex, and he'd never had sex with a man. Even if he did find Barnaby attractive, Kotetsu didn't really know where to go with that, and when. He just knew how he felt about Barnaby as a person.

"I guess," he finally replied, still not moving.

Unfortunately for him Barnaby did move and that warm chest with the comforting heartbeat was gone. Kotetsu groaned and rolled onto his back while Barnaby stood up, running a hand through his messy blonde hair. "Come on Kotetsu, up. We barely have time for coffee."

"You mean breakfast," Kotetsu corrected him. One thing he had noticed about Barnaby was that he didn't eat very well. He seemed to think he didn't have the time to do it, or maybe it was that he found it to be a waste of time.

And so, for the past couple of weeks, Kotetsu had forced him to eat eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes, a whole list of things. He wasn't good at cooking pancakes but still managed a few edible batches and Barnaby begrudgingly admitted that he liked them.

"We really don't have time, though." Barnaby pointed to the clock. Kotetsu turned his head and realized they were running a full twenty minutes later than their usual time.

"Damn!" He finally jumped out of the bed, pulling his shirt off in the process. That nearly sent him falling down face first with his hands stuck inside his sleeves, but Barnaby caught him around the middle.

"Careful! Here, I'll help." Barnaby took his shirt and tugged it over Kotetsu's head himself.

"Bunny I didn't need help with my shirt! I can, I can take off shirts."

"I know that. I like taking off your shirt though," Barnaby said before completely leaving the room.

Kotetsu stared after him.

They didn't have time for anything other than coffee. Barnaby had been right about that. Before long they were changed into their swimsuits and Kotetsu felt totally exposed. His swimsuit was silly, a full body thing that had blue and white stripes. It was insisted on that he wear scuba gear and carry an inflatable tube.

Barnaby got the tiniest speedo he'd ever seen in his life.

What amazed Kotetsu was that he was comfortable in it. Barnaby was on display. Kotetsu's suit clung tightly enough that he felt like he was too. Every line on his body could be seen and the shape of his muscles enhanced. He didn't mind that. What he did mind was the tightness by his crotch. He held the tube in front of himself uncomfortably, very much not needing anyone to know the size of his cash and prizes. Even more awkward was Barnaby in all his practically-naked-glory. If there was one thing Kotetsu wasn't going to risk for the both of them was himself getting noticeably turned on.

Luckily he avoided that, likely due to the distraction of the woman interviewing them. Apparently they were just late enough on such a tightly packed schedule that the interview for later had to happen while Kotetsu avoided putting on goggles and Barnaby struck suggestive poses – his gaze often settling on Kotetsu. He wondered if the cameraman noticed, or the interviewer.

She asked them the typical questions, though her distraction was obvious when he eyes roamed Barnaby's body. That miniscule action bothered Kotetsu and made him feel pretty possessive. He couldn't say anything about it which was somewhat frustrating.

He could not even begin to describe the relief he felt when they got to change out. It was relief that quickly turned into anxiety when they ended up in the dressing room and Barnaby peeled off his speedo like it was nothing (and really, it was). Kotetsu's suit clung so much he was having trouble getting out of it and Barnaby came right over to help without even bothering to get dressed.

It wasn't an issue. Barnaby was quiet and careful, never making a lewd comment or letting his hands wander. Kotetsu wasn't sure what he'd been afraid of, as Barnaby stepped away and he stripped himself of the thing completely. He was – oh yea. He was kind of completely exposed too. They hadn't even showered together yet. Even if they had changed in the same room before, it was different when things were romantic.

Barnaby must have been thinking similar. They just stared at each other, taking in every detail for a good minute. It was surprisingly comfortable. It would be dumb to make an issue out of it. Just because they were naked didn't mean something had to happen right that second. It killed a lot of Kotetsu's anxiety – Barnaby really was beautiful, and he had every right to look – to eventually touch. Kotetsu closed the distance between himself and Barnaby, settled his hands on his shoulders, and gave him a nice long kiss. And that was as far as it went.

"I just don't see why they had to put so much stuff together like that," Kotetsu grumbled on their drive home that night. That shoot was followed by another interview and then they had to do guest voices for a holiday special – it was so much, too much, in one day. Barnaby seemed to handle it just fine, but Kotetsu didn't and didn't want to.

He was grouchy, and that's all there was to it.

Barnaby sighed. "It wasn't that bad. We don't have as full a schedule for tomorrow. We still have some stuff to do, but…"

"More! Bunny we have to keep training, and to have our call bracelets off – it's not right! Heroing isn't about answering stupid questions like 'what shampoo do you use?'. It's about helping people, about saving their lives!"

"This stuff is important!" Barnaby snapped as he stopped for a light.

"It's petty and a waste of time!"

Barnaby fell silent, angry, and Kotetsu didn't dare break the quiet. He hated arguing with Barnaby. It felt like he was just hurting himself. But he was right, he knew he had to be right.

When Barnaby did break the silence Kotetsu startled. "You liked watching Legend, right?"

"Of course I did." Legend was his hero.

"Did you like it when he talked about how it felt to fight crime? Didn't you enjoy learning about him as a person, as much as you could with his secret identity?"

"Sure…"

"Somewhere there's some kid watching you, Kotetsu. And before you even try to shut me up I know this kid, where ever he or she is, I know it brightens their day when you talk about yourself or they get to see a special on you even if it's some stupid picture of you in a swimsuit." He stopped for another light. "You can't tell me that's hard to understand."

"And you can't even try to convince me that you do this stupid shit for that reason." Kotetsu regretted the words right away. He understood very well what Barnaby was saying, after all.

The response he got was not what he expected, even if Barnaby's words were short, crisp, cold. "Then I won't. Because that's not the reason."

"Then what is it?" Kotetsu's tone was annoyed but he was genuinely curious about how on earth his mean little statement could be true.

"I…for you."

"What?" Ridiculous. But Barnaby wasn't a liar. "How on earth is something that annoys me supposed to be…for me?"

Barnaby's shoulders sagged. "I just hoped you would see it differently."

Kotetsu blinked as Barnaby's anger turned into disappointment. That made him feel pretty awful. Angry Barnaby he would deal with, but letting him down? Not so much.

Kotetsu found words about five minutes later, and tried to speak them two minutes after that. He needed to help Barnaby feel better. "Hey, Bunny, I-"

Then something crashed down in front of the car and Barnaby turned the wheel quickly, sending them into a spin.

Fire. There was a lot of fire.

The sign that had hit them was only the first hazard in a line of destruction. A strange NEXT, a power-type had gone crazy. She'd destroyed cars and anything else she could get her hands on. Kotetsu and Barnaby had rushed to calm her down as a man with white hair watched them from his place on the ground. He must have fallen out of the blue van that was burning behind him.

"Shit Bunny, this girl is tough!" Kotetsu yelled as he held onto her arm and tried to force it to her side. That didn't work at all. Barnaby was attempting the exact same and getting nowhere. They'd activated their own powers just moments before to stop her from hurting the man on the ground. But their combined powers even…how could they be no match for her?

"I know! Just try to hold her down. Help will be on the way!"

Kotetsu nodded and tried. Explosions and a rampage like that in the city would not go unnoticed and surely more heroes would be deployed. That was a relief. Kotetsu also thought he was getting somewhere as her arm started to give.

Then both her arms flew straight out even as they both clung to them and she started spinning at a superhuman speed.

Kotetsu flew off first, and crashed backwards into a building. That hurt, and the chunk of debris that hit his head after felt even worse. Looked up he saw that Barnaby had landed on his feet against the building, as if he were going to just climb back down. Kotetsu smiled.

Then he pulled himself up and ran at the NEXT.

He nearly stopped dead in his tracks. Her neck was snapped, head lolling about uselessly at her side. Yet she was still moving. He'd reached her before realizing she had sparks jumping from her neck. "She's a damn robot!" he yelled as Barnaby landed.

Barnaby spun around to the man they'd saved, who had just stood up. He started talking but Kotetsu couldn't hear. The girl's…robot's…face started to burn off. It was disturbing to say the least even if seeing metal under that skin should have been a relief. He didn't want to see someone burning again.

He shuddered at the memory and the thing took its chance. Its fist hit him in the stomach and he flew back again, into another part of the wall. Damn, he was not going to be feeling good after the fight. He dreaded that.

Even though he knew he couldn't waste time he looked for Barnaby. He had a gut feeling something was not right. When he did see him, behind a partially destroyed car and a knocked down lamppost, he was yelling at the white haired man. The man looked relaxed, too relaxed. He had to have something to do with the thing…

The thing that grabbed him by his shirt and started pulling him up. "Hey, hey hey!" Kotetsu struggled and grabbed the hand. He managed to free himself, though in an instant he was back on the robot, trying to knock it down. More of its fake flesh burned off. Kotetsu got on top of it. He was on the shoulders and trying to hold it down.

That was when it showed it had rockets in its feet.

It tried to fly up and get rid of him but luckily he still managed to hold it down. But Kotetsu also felt incredibly dizzy. It was likely from taking two bad hits. He gritted his teeth and hung on. He managed to do so for a few seconds before his power simply shut off and the thing tossed him off effortlessly.

Kotetsu landed nearly in some of the fire. He jumped up and went at it regardless of his powers being inactive for the moment. He was slow and it hit hard. Kotetsu yelled as he fell down backwards and looked again for Barnaby. His Bunny looked in his direction, alarmed, but something the man said distracted him again.

He felt himself hauled up by the back of his shirt that time. Kotetsu barely had time to register an embarrassing hope that Lunatic would show up and stop it all before he was smashed head first into that building he kept hitting.

That hurt, It hurt so much the pain was difficult to comprehend – the thing was stronger than both of them combined. How had he even survived his head being bashed in so hard? He struggled and tried to get away before his face smacked concrete again. He heard a crunch; his nose had to have been broken by that one. It picked him up and mercifully didn't slam him into the wall – instead it slammed him directly onto the ground. Kotetsu's head hit with a heavy thud and he was sure something cracked.

With him down and not moving, it started to walk away. At least, that's what he thought. It was hard to see. His vision swam and it soon vanished. Things went dark and he heard the sound of Barnaby's voice. Everything ran into one dull buzzing sound in his head, he felt pain and heat from the fire.

He wanted to go home. He wanted to see Kaede.

The last thing he felt was a strong gust of wind on his face.

"You're pretty useless aren't you?"

"No…"

"You don't believe that. Let me repeat the question, you're pretty useless aren't you?"

"Yes."

Tomoe's face. The words coming from her mouth didn't match the voice. Her face became Barnaby's and finally Kaede's. The voice never fit.

"Dad you never call me. Do you hate me?"

"No, sweetie, I've just been busy, it's hard to find time."

"But you find time to be with Barnaby? Dad why don't you call me?"

"It hasn't been that long since…how did you know I'm with Barnaby?"

"Because you can't hide shit, including your latest disappointment." Kaede's face twisted and distorted and was replaced by Night Terror's. He was smirking.

"You're dead!" Kotetsu shouted, clawing at the air in an effort to get his hands on Night Terror. His hands went uselessly right through the smiling face and Kotetsu screamed in anger as it faded and he saw nothing but black.

Suddenly he was aware of sitting straight up, his arms crossed over his chest. First everything spun and he thought he'd vomit. He didn't. When the spinning stopped he noticed he was in a hotel room. He recognized the horrible white blandness of the room, lacking even an array of weird beeping machines hooked up to him. He had windows but no light poured through them. It was still night. There were flowers on a table next to his bed, and more at the foot of it. They were pretty much the only color of the room.

Was he Tomoe?

"Oh, you're awake." The voice broke him from that bizarre worry.

"I am…" He looked up to see a nurse, a pretty woman with her blonde hair tied back in a ponytail. How had he not noticed her seconds ago? Maybe she had just entered the room.

"You've been out for a few hours."

"Oh…" More feeling came back. He had a dull ache in his nose, and his head hurt like hell. "…Am I okay?"

"Yes. Your nose was broken so we did what we could to set it…" She made a face. "But you accelerated your own healing."

"Huh?"

"We had a scary moment a couple of hours ago where you began to glow blue – using your powers. You were still asleep, we thought…guess we were right."

"I used my Hundred Power in my sleep…?" That had to be a new one. He really had no way of knowing if it worked in his sleep because he was, well, asleep. People reacted to dreams in their sleep, talking and twitching. Perhaps it was like that.

The nurse studied him. "It could have been a dream, yes."

"Huh? Oh…crap, I said that all out loud huh?" He thought it'd just been in his head. He wondered how bad he was.

"Yes, yes you did," she answered, a small smile forming on her lips. "It's alright though. You've had some head trauma, and just woken up. Those two combined…"

"Make me a little loopy," Kotetsu finished and laughed. He quickly stopped. "So how bad am I? Do I still need to be here?"

"Probably not, but we still had to admit you when your partner brought you in – he passed out right after in the waiting room, I think he's still there – and we wanted to observe you before okaying you for release. My apologies but we don't really have a way to guess about NEXT powers and healing…"

"That's okay…Bunny brought me?"

"Threw you right on that motorcycle thing of his it looks like. He was pretty scared when he came in with you."

Kotetsu smiled to himself and stared at his lap, suddenly not minding the bland hospital bedding that covered him. Of course Barnaby would be worried about him. He knew that and was still touched. "So anyway…can I go?"

She shook her head. "No, we need to have you the full night. We can go through the paperwork in the morning. And how well do you feel, anyway?"

"Dizzy and…if I'm accidentally talking my thoughts I guess that's not good." His head hurt, and he did feel sort of like he was still dreaming, even if he knew he wasn't. "I guess I'm not ready to go walking out of here."

"Nope." She paused to pick up the clipboard attached to the front of his bed. She studied it only seconds before putting it down. "You likely have a concussion…I'm not sure if Hundred Power can heal that," she said and Kotetsu just shrugged. "Regardless we'll probably send you home with some medicine."

"For the headaches and stuff?" Kotetsu asked. He hoped it all wouldn't hurt much.

"No, although we will if the pain is a problem. Concussions go away on their own, in their own time and we can only treat the symptoms…pain might be an issue, but that's not what I'm worried about."

"What, then?"

"I took a look at your file earlier and looked at it again just now. You are seeing a therapist, correct? For issues related to depression?"

"Um, yea." Suddenly everything felt uncomfortable, and he wanted Barnaby.

"Patients with depression can recover slower from a concussion, can have more of a struggle. Putting you on some drugs to treat that can help, and I'm wondering if you should be on them long term. I'll consult with your therapist…"

Kotetsu's shoulders sagged. He'd been trying to avoid getting on medication. He didn't want to. He wanted to beat it with sheer willpower. Besides, his unhappiness wasn't due to his own brain, was it? It was more of the things that happened to and around him. "Oh…"

"If not, we might still have you on them a while to be safe."

Kotetsu nodded. The room spun and he stopped, slowly lying back down. His previous good mood, even if it was barely there, has gone.

"I'm sorry, I know that wasn't news you wanted to hear."

"Uh-huh." Kotetsu couldn't muster up much more of a reply than that, and he felt tired anyway. The nurse bid him good night eventually and left the room.

Kotetsu woke up to a room full of people. Actually there were only three people, but in such a small room it felt like a lot. He felt disoriented.

He could see Antonio, Nathan, and Ivan. They looked way too serious, all of them.

"Hey," he said, his voice coming out in a croak. "Oh God, do I sound that bad?"

"Yup. You don't look as bad as you sound, though," Nathan said with a wink and Kotetsu immediately felt more comfortable.

"Why are all of you here?"

"Just in the case you need us," Antonio said while the other two nodded.

"Thanks, guys," Kotetsu said as a smile slowly spread over his face. He did feel better than he had in the middle of the night. He wasn't so dizzy though his head did feel heavy. And he wasn't sure how he felt as far as mood. He just wasn't awake or very aware yet, he supposed.

"No problem," Antonio responded, and smirked. "Now that we're here, you owe us. You need to come out with us and hang out for once."

"Aw…but I don't think I should drink."

"Who said anything about drinking? We can shoot some pool, or go somewhere and eat a huge manly steak…" Antonio looked pretty happy about that idea.

Nathan rolled his eyes. "I was thinking a classy dinner and a show, maybe with some shrimp cocktails."

"I don't have any ideas," Ivan said rather forlornly, and then smiled as they all kind of chuckled at that.

"Okay, okay I'll hang with you guys when I'm up to it. I have a feeling they're going to tell me to rest even if I heal super fast or whatever." Kotetsu meant it, too. He was so happy they were there to see him. It meant a lot when he had been a pretty bad friend to all of them. "I don't deserve you guys, you know."

"What!" Nathan exclaimed and brought his hand to his chest.

"Hey, none of that." Antonio waved his finger. "We would be horrible friends if we sat around and got pissed at you for spending time with your new boyfriend while trying to juggle your own issues and the job."

"Yea, but, I mean I have had time to – wait what? Boy-boy…" They hadn't told anyone they were a couple.

"Oh please. You insult me, Kotetsu." Nathan pretended to look sad. "Anyone with eyes and ears and any sort of common sense could tell. None of us stand around hugging in the gym. Even if we want to," Nathan said and gave Antonio a pouty look.

"Yea, and you-HEY!" Antiono jumped as Nathan grabbed his ass pretty forcefully. "The hospital is not the place for this!"

"Oh, honey no you have it all wrong, this is where they have the nurse outfits…"

"STOP TOUCHING ME!"

Kotetsu just laughed, feeling good and entertained. "Fine, fine, it's obvious…where is Bunny, anyway?"

"The waiting room," Ivan supplied quietly.

"Still? I thought he'd be in here first."

"Um that's our fault," Antonio said as Nathan dropped his hand. "We gave him a lot of shit for what happened to you."

"You what?" Kotetsu stared.

"He was standing around talking about his past while you got beat up. Keith was the one who had to save the day," Antonio continued. "He wanted to be here but he ended up at an interview…"

"I told him you were in his hands, and he messed up." Nathan said coldly, and then sighed. "Though I suppose, he probably though he had time with you both using your power. And he looked shaken up about everything, he was so pale when we came in…"

"Bunny…" Kotetsu said, more to himself than anyone. He wasn't mad at him even if he should have been.

"He has been taking good care of you, I suppose," Nathan added.

"You make it sound like I need a babysitter."

"No," Nathan said, shaking his head. "You just should be with someone who can also help you, Kotetsu. And I guess he has been."

Kotetsu just nodded. Then he spoke. "I'm glad to see you guys, but I do want to see him too. Can someone go get him?"

Antonio nodded. "Yea. This room is creeping me out anyway. We'll head out and go get him."

"Okay." Kotetsu finally sat up and leaned against the back of the bed. "Thanks again…guess I need to make up for Keith not being here," he said with a laugh.

The others laughed and said goodbye – that is, Antonio and Nathan did and Ivan said he'd catch up. He remained quiet as they left.

"Ivan?" Kotetsu had to prompt after a few minutes of awkward silence.

Ivan looked at him and then down to the side of the bed. "Are you really dating Mr. Barnaby?"

"Heh. I am." Acknowledging it again out loud made him feel a little giddy.

"How do you know?"

"Um, huh?"

"How do you know you want to be with someone?" Ivan asked.

"…Oh." Love advice…greeeat. "It's…hard to say Ivan, everyone notices it a different way."

"How did you, then?' Ivan said, finally meeting his eyes.

"Well I found myself always wanting to be around him and talking to him and thinking about him…that sounds obsessive but it wasn't, exactly. It's a different kind of fuzzy happy feeling," he said, struggling to describe it. "When I started to feel like maybe I couldn't live without him I guess that told me. Hell, when I was at home and he wasn't there for the night even before we were dating, it felt empty. It didn't feel right."

Ivan nodded slowly. "So what if….what if you think about them and all that, all the time, and…if you feel all that…" He trailed off, his words a little muddled.

"Yes?"

"What if he's not good for you?"

"Barnaby is very-"

"No, I mean, what if I like someone and he's not good for me and I still feel all those things?"

"…Uh…" That he couldn't help with. "I don't know. Who are we talking about?"

"You'll get mad," Ivan practically whispered.

"Will I?"

"Yes." Ivan nodded. "But I can't help it. He calls me when he can and even if we almost always argue, I never want him to stop calling me and I want to hear everything and a lot of the time I wish he was with me at home."

He, he, he… "I'm gonna ask again, who?"

Ivan looked away. He didn't answer, and before Kotetsu could prod further, the door opened again and in came Barnaby.

"Thank you, Mr. Tiger," Ivan said suddenly, and he rushed out of the room without another word. Barnaby watched him go and raised an eyebrow, but didn't ask.

Instead he returned his gaze to Kotetsu. The others had been right – he was pale. And he looked uncomfortable, standing there.

"Bunny, come here."

"Should I? This is my fault," Barnaby said miserably.

"No, no it's not. Unless I'm really messed up, I don't think you put my head through that wall." He held out his hand.

"No, but I was talking to Rotwang and-"

"Who?" Kotetsu asked.

"Rotwang. Used to work for my parents. He created that android to replace NEXTs, using my parent's research."

Kotetsu was shocked. That had to be absolutely terrible for Barnaby to hear. Of course he'd been distracted! "Come here," he said again, motioning with his outstretched hand.

Barnaby hesitated but walked over, and placed his hand in Kotetsu's. "I'm so sorry. I…I'm so, so sorry."

"Don't apologize. This isn't your fault. I can't imagine what that was like for you. I may have frozen up too."

"No. You would never have frozen up and you know that. Don't say such silly things to make me feel better."

Kotetsu frowned. "Fair enough. But still, I understand. And I'm not mad. I'm just happy you're here."

Barnaby nodded, but he didn't kneel down to kiss or hug Kotetsu. That in itself made Kotetsu feel that ache in his stomach, the one he got when he convinced himself he was worthless.

"I'm going to be okay you know. I healed the hell out of myself apparently, and I have a concussion but it's nothing that some time and medicine won't fix."

"I know you're okay. But what if you weren't?" Barnaby asked.

"I…come on, let's not dwell on that. I'm here."

"Yea, until I fuck up next time."

"I'm supposed to be the one with those thoughts," Kotetsu mumbled, his mood dropping down more.

It was good timing that the nurse came in when she did, the same from the middle of the night. She looked tired and Kotetsu guessed she was near the end of a long shift. She had some in to sign him out, basically, and send him with a prescription. Barnaby's eyes widened but he didn't ask. Kotetsu didn't even want the medicine, but she was insistent.

In the end he stopped at the hospital pharmacy, and Barnaby drove them to his apartment.

Barnaby didn't perk up at all even when they were home. He just looked sad as Kotetsu changed his clothes, happy to be in his own bedroom with his own bed that smelled like him and Barnaby and not like gross hospital air. He wasn't tired and wasn't sure what to do. He couldn't go back to work and he had to rest and at some point he had to start on that small bottle of pills he was sent home with.

He ended up in front of his television, falling asleep on and off even sitting up. He was told he might be exhausted, and he sort of was. It was hard to keep his eyes open sometimes, and then for an hour he'd be wide awake.

It was early evening when he was woken up by a strange sound. It sounded like whimpering and crying. And it wasn't coming from him, which he made sure to check, somehow. He was so confused for a few moments he didn't even remember he was home.

When his surroundings registered, he noted Barnaby was on the couch with him, his head nearly in Kotetsu's lap and glasses nowhere on his face. He had been awake the whole day but he was clearly asleep at that moment. But he wasn't sleeping peacefully.

His whole body trembled and his hands twitched where they stuck out under the thin tan blanket covering him. Kotetsu could see tears on his cheeks. It was another nightmare.

"Bunny," he said, shaking his shoulder carefully. "Bunny wake up."

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Barnaby screeched back in response, lifting his head up and scaring the shit out of Kotetsu.

Kotetsu took his hand away and leaned back, but he didn't get up. He saw Barnaby's eyes slowly opening after his outburst. "Bunny?" he asked cautiously.

Barnaby looked up at him. "Huh…wha?"

"You had a nightmare."

"But you're okay?" Barnaby sounded wide awake, even though he hadn't been seconds ago.

"Of course." Kotetsu smiled down at him. He still hadn't gotten to kiss him since they got back. He hadn't even gotten to hold him.

"Oh." Barnaby sighed and hauled himself up into a sitting position. "I had a dream they shot you too."

"Who?"

Barnaby shrugged. "Another man made of fire, like in the nightmares I used to have. That…that Rotwang guy."

"I see. I'm okay Bunny."

'But last night, because of me…"

"Not that again! You…shut up and kiss me", he said, leaning toward Barnaby.

"But…"

Kotetsu growled as Barnaby protested and tugged on his arm, drawing him closer so their lips were firmly pressed together. Barnaby hesitated, but relaxed and parted his lips for Kotetsu. He reached for Kotetsu's sleeve and grasped it tightly as their kiss deepened.

If there was one thing Kotetsu was intent on doing, it was showing Barnaby that despite whatever shit went down the night before, he still wanted him and needed him and loved him.

He supposed the first two went without saying, but as Kotetsu's hand rested on the back of Barnaby's head, he realized what he'd never said. Maybe that was because it hadn't hit him completely until that moment, even though it was always there.

Their lips parted, but Kotetsu didn't draw back. He gently scratched Barnaby's head, and touched their foreheads together. "Hey, Barnaby, I have something to say to you."

"What? …Why did you use my name?" He almost sounded sad.

Kotetsu made a mental note (that he hoped would stick around) to tease Barnaby for that later. However, then was not the time. Kotetsu smiled. "Barnaby I love you," he said, his smile growing after he said it.

Barnaby stared. And then he stared some more. He stared even longer after that and Kotetsu couldn't help but think 'I broke him!'. Before Kotetsu could go into a genuine panic, Barnaby responded. "You…mean that?"

"Why wouldn't I? I love you," he repeated. It didn't matter that they hadn't even known each other a year. Kotetsu knew how he felt, and it wasn't some strange emotion that the concussion had painted into his brain. Love was a feeling he knew. "If you don't feel the same, it's okay. I just wanted to tell you."

"How the hell could I not feel the same!" Barnaby said, surprised and he leaned back.

Kotetsu blinked. "Well there is a difference between liking someone a lot, you know, romantically, and actually being in love with them…"

"I wouldn't become so involved with someone unless what I felt for them…what I feel for you is very strong…" Barnaby swallowed and moved closer to Kotetsu. He looked around as if someone would hear him and pulled Kotetsu closer with a hand on his shoulder. Just as Kotetsu thought they were going to kiss again, Barnaby placed his head next to Kotetsu's instead, his lips next to his ear as he whispered.

"I love you too."


	7. My life and love might still go on

It seemed very strange to be starting on antidepressants the day that Barnaby said he loved him.

And yet, Kotetsu stood in the kitchen with the little orange pill resting in his hand, making faces at it and trying his best to avoid actually taking it. He didn't have a chance. Barnaby stood across from him, arms crossed and his look stern. He'd pushed a glass of milk into Kotetsu's other hand and then just waited.

Kotetsu summoned all his willpower and slammed the little pill back, quickly chugging his milk with it. He continued until the glass was empty and then set it on the counter. He stared at Barnaby, who stared back. It wasn't like the pill was going to work that instant. In fact, it may take weeks, the pharmacist said, which clued Kotetsu in that it was going to be more long term, and not to aid in any effects from his concussion. That was frustrating but he couldn't resist either, not with Barnaby watching him carefully.

After a couple of minutes, Kotetsu just shrugged at Barnaby. He didn't know what the hell they were standing around waiting for. Barnaby sighed and dropped his arms before taking Kotetsu's hand and leading him to the bedroom. Kotetsu had been sleeping a lot of the day but he felt exhausted anyway. He asked Barnaby if he was even tired as they undressed and dropped onto the bed. Barnaby just rolled over and kissed him and really that was the best response he could have given.

It should have been more than enough just to fall asleep in Barnaby's arms, Kotetsu thought. Why did he need to take medication to feel better? Why couldn't love fix all? Kotetsu just wanted to feel like someone needed and wanted him. Barnaby wanted and needed him and yet Kotetsu had such a hard time feeling any better.

He snuggled into Barnaby more and let himself drift off.

Waking up was a little freaky. Kotetsu actually woke up a few different times that morning, his head feeling strange. It felt heavy; that wasn't unusual. It was the 'twitch' feeling he felt, like a gear was struggling to turn in his mind. Something had changed and his head was attempting to understand it. He couldn't find any difference in his usual emotions, but then again Kotetsu was only half awake for most of it.

When he woke up for the last time he noticed his head still felt strange, and it hurt. His stomach hurt too. He felt a little numb and something was...off. He had no idea what. It was just off. The room looked normal, his bed felt normal, the regular breathing of Barnaby next to him felt normal, but none of it seemed to make sense like it should.

"Bunny. Bunny please wake up," he said, rolling on his side and shaking Barnaby's shoulder.

"Hmmm?" Barnaby blinked his eyes open. "Time to get up already..."

Funny to hear that from him...Barnaby was always the one who got up first. That was sad, because he was adorable when he was asleep. "I don't know...I haven't looked."

"Oh..." His eyes started to shut again.

"Bunny I feel weird."

His eyes shot right back open and Barnaby quickly sat up, looking down at him. "What kind of weird? Remember we talked about how if they make you feel even worse, we-"

"We deal with it, because it might get worse before it gets better." Kotetsu watched Barnaby as he opened his mouth to respond. He didn't do it quickly enough and Kotetsu kept going. "My head hurts, my stomach hurts, and everything seems weird."

"...I just asked you what kind of weird."

"I don't know! Everything is just off. This room makes sense but it doesn't, and there's this feeling in my head like something is changing."

Barnaby rubbed his own forehead, squeezing his eyes shut for a few seconds. "This is probably normal."

"I guess. I don't know. Does the room feel okay to you?"

Barnaby opened his eyes and gave him a perfect 'wow did you really just ask me that' look.

Kotetsu sighed. "Fine, fine, okay. This is just new!"

"I know." Barnaby's look gave way to one of concern, and he reached for Kotetsu's face to stroke his cheek. "It's going to take a while. Sorry, I'll try to be more patient."

"It's not your problem. Go ahead and be annoyed."

"Not my problem? Please, you're my biggest problem."

"Hey!" Kotetsu glared at him.

Barnaby just smiled.

The first week was pretty rough. Kotetsu had a lot of ups and downs and the whole time he was embarrassed. He was a burden and annoying and just a huge sad sack which meant he was everything he didn't want to be. When his mood went down, it took a fucking nosedive into the floor and had him snapping at everyone or more often, completely retreating into himself. Barnaby always tried to tempt him back out. Most of the time he succeeded but sometimes Kotetsu just couldn't do it and Barnaby stomped off pissed off only to come back hours later to try again.

Kaede called one night. Kotetsu was surprised, but happily so as he answered the phone. His head was in Barnaby's lap on the couch so he kept it to voice only. "Hi honey!"

"Dad! Why the hell don't you call anymore!" was the greeting from the other end and Kotetsu winced.

"Daddy's been busy at work! A lot going on, you know." Actually he didn't get to do shit at work. If anything he had picked up everyone else's paperwork because Lloyds was too nervous to let him out to go Hero-ing. Frustrating was putting it mildly, because even with his failing powers Kotetsu knew getting out and just doing something would take his mind off it. "How's my little girl?"

"I'm not little!"

"Okay, well, how's my girl?"

"To be yours you'd have to call more than once a month and...and you haven't even visited since you went back."

"I know...I'm sorry."

"Unless sorry puts you on the next train it's not worth anything!"

Kotetsu closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths, letting Barnaby's fingers wander over his forehead. They'd just been watching a movie when Kaede called, but it was going to be comfort hour instead, it appeared. Kotetsu had a good day but he was aware that the call could change that, and fast. "I...know. I know an apology means I'm not there," he finally answered.

"Can't you come home?" Kaede's voice turned to pleading.

"I can ask..."

"Dad that's not good enough! There was a father-daughter dance the other day and- and I'm too old to go to one of those, they're for the tiny kids, but what if I had wanted to!" The fact that she even brought it up suggested to Kotetsu that she had wanted to go and missed out. "And all the other kids ask me where my dad is and some think you just left me!"

"That is not true!" Kotetsu said, his voice rising as he replied. "Kaede I suck at calling, but I haven't just up and left you!"

"Yea right!" Kaede's voice had an edge to it, as if she was going to cry, and then there was an awkward sort of quiet. She hadn't hung up, but she certainly wasn't at the phone anymore.

Kotetsu waited though, and said nothing despite Barnaby asking what was going on. Eventually his mom picked up the abandoned phone with a sigh. "She's in bed. She had a bad day at school after getting a bad grade on an assignment."

"Oh..."

"But that doesn't mean she doesn't have a point. You really need to come home and see her!"

"You know it's difficult, with my job..."

"Interesting, because I haven't seen you on the television lately."

It was like a knife to his heart. He hadn't even thought about that. How many other people had noticed that there was no Wild Tiger at the side of Barnaby Brooks Jr.? Kotetsu already felt bad that his partner had to take care of things alone. He wondered if his disappearance from the show caused him to get mocked. "Ah, oh, I..."

"More importantly...is everything okay?" His mother's voice grew strangely soft.

"Yes, Mom."

"You're lying."

"Then no, Mom! Everything has not been okay! But I'm trying to make things better!" He really was. Barnaby gave him a worried look. "It's just been a struggle, okay?"

"What's been happening?"

"It's just...stuff, okay?"

"No one can help you if you don't say anything!" his mom scolded him, with words that he had heard multiple times over the years.

"Bu...Barnaby's helping me! He's been helping me! He does...he does everything he can," Kotetsu said as his gaze fixed on Barnaby's worried face.

"I...see. Since you're just going to clam up, I'll say I'm glad someone's there with you, Kotetsu. But Kaede needs you, probably as much as you need your Barnaby," she said very slowly.

His mom could see right through him. Just those few lines probably was enough for her to get that he and Barnaby were more than friends. She's always been fast like that. "Um, you're probably right."

"You know I am. If you haven't been on the television I doubt whatever you're doing for now is so vital that you can't come home for a few days, am I right?"

"I guess..."

"If you need to bring Barnaby to come here, I don't mind, I guess. Kaede would actually love that..."

"He's busy, though, he really is..."

"When will you be here?"

"Day after tomorrow...hey!" She was a sly one! Just going on and slipping in that question. "Yea, fine." He gave up, defeated. "I'll come home for a few days," he said.

"Good. Now I need to go wash the dishes. We'll be waiting for you." There was a click as she hung up the phone, not giving him the option to come up with anymore excuses.

Kotetsu found himself on the train two days later. He didn't feel very good, mostly stressed. Bringing up his home visit to Barnaby had been a difficult thing. Barnaby really wanted him to go and spend time with his daughter, but Kotetsu could tell he was holding something back. So, he proceeded to be his dumb self and start poking about it, eventually getting it out of Barnaby that he was worried about Kotetsu going home. What if it made him worse? Or what if it made him better and he didn't want to come back? Kotetsu was stunned. He loved Barnaby. He'd always want to come back to him, it was just a visit. Barnaby apologized.

Still, during their temporary goodbyes it turned into an argument when Kotetsu made a comment about not using his pills and just drinking St. John's Wort so that he wouldn't have to risk his mother or daughter catching him. Barnaby's call bracelet went off right as he was telling Kotetsu to knock that shit off and talk to his family. Barnaby left in a hurry, Kotetsu's train arrived, and they didn't even get to hug goodbye.

As a result Kotetsu felt pretty miserable even as the station pulled into his hometown where a light rain was falling. The sky was a little dark. It made Kotetsu's mood drop momentarily until he found his brother waiting in his clunker of a delivery van. It was running and the inside was nice and warm and dry so Kotetsu didn't complain. He did however try to make conversation, but his brother didn't seem pleased to see him.

Neither did his mom or Kaede, for that matter.

Everyone seemed a little mad at him upon arriving. His mom wasn't very warm with him, and so he made the mistake of going into Kaede's room, boredly pulling open the drawer in her desk to see pictures of Barnaby, and worst of all, he got caught.

No one was happy with him. Why did he go back? It was the same old place as usual, cute little house, his family, reminders of the life he used to have all around him...

"Mom, Kaede won't talk to me," he said that night after dinner, after his daughter had slammed the door to her room and refused to answer him even as he apologized for going through her stuff.

"I noticed. And you apologized?" she asked.

At the end of the day, sitting at the table and relaxing, his mother was more outspoken and even gentle than she had been when he found her watering her garden earlier in the day. It was likely because they were both tired. "I did. Mom, she wanted me to come home but doesn't want me to talk to her. I don't get it."

"Put yourself in her shoes," she said. "Imagine your father came home for the first time in years, would you immediately warm up to him?"

"That's different. I call Kaede and send her stuff even if it's not every week. Dad left when I was little," he grumbled. He wished he'd gotten to know him. If he came back right at that second...well, Kotetsu probably would want to slap him for leaving him alone. Maybe he understood Kaede a little...

"Regardless, you need to give her time and a reason to warm up to you. Got it?"

"Sure, but..."

"And don't tell me you have to rush back to Stern Bild. I can tell that isn't true," she said. "I'll give you time to explain yourself. But I know you still aren't at work."

"Mom..."

"Go see your brother at the liquor store."

"Huh!" Muramasa had been so cold to him earlier...

"Just do it."

And so, Kotetsu did. He walked to the store which was not far, his hands shoved in the pockets of the blue shirt he had changed into after arriving home. The rain had stayed light, but it was pretty cold. He wrestled with what to tell Muramasa when he rejected the whiskey he would likely be poured. The warning on his medication said not to use with alcohol. It was time to take it soon. Barnaby hadn't let him have a beer since he started on it even though Kotetsu doubted a single beer would do a thing. His brother would let him, no, encourage him to have way more than a beer even if he remained serious and dull throughout it while Kotetsu got stupid.

Kotetsu entered the dim store and sat at the freshly cleaned bar while his brother stood behind it, drying glasses. "So, you came," he said without turning.

"I did. But tell me right now if you need me to go," Kotetsu said sullenly.

"No, Kotetsu, you're fine. I'm busy, but I have time for my little brother," he replied with a sigh.

That made Kotetsu smile though, and he leaned forward in his seat. "How have you been?"

"Just fine."

"So you still spend a lot of time with Mom and Kaede?"

"Of course. I help out around the house a lot, and sometimes Kaede helps me here."

"...Here? This is a liquor store."

"Sure. It's not like she drinks it, just helps me count the drawer sometimes or cleans, or decorates..." He stood aside and revealed a crayon picture of their house that hung on the wall, one of a few drawings actually that hung above a shelf of different bottles. Kotetsu didn't have to ask to know they were all from Kaede. Muramasa had so much of her art, and he himself had none.

He didn't dwell on that, spending his time instead asking about things that had occurred in his absence. Life was uneventful in Oriental Town it seemed, though not in a bad way. Kaede was doing well overall in school despite the bad grade she'd gotten recently, and she had friends even if she didn't play with them as often as anyone would like. She would often keep to herself and Anju had to pry things out of her, but she did end up admitting when she was sad, much unlike her father.

On that subject, Muramasa had nodded toward the glass of – of course, whiskey – that he had poured for his brother. "Come on Kotetsu, it's the good stuff."

"Ah, I'm sure, I'm just not sure I feel up to drinking..."

"Odd. Why?" Muramasa studied him. "Do you want to do a toast first?"

"No. I'm not drinking anymore."

"That's a lie."

Kotetsu looked at his brother, hurt. "No, it's true!"

"You've always drank. Varying quantities...but I've never seen you turn down a glass of whiskey poured by your brother."

"I decided to change that..."

"I see."

"A man of my age, you see..." Kotetsu caught himself and paused, realizing quickly where he'd just fucked up.

"Your age? I'm older than you," Muramasa said with a frown. "Cut the bullshit and tell me what's really going on."

"Nothing! It's nothing at all, okay? I can't expl-"

"Bullshit!" Muramasa exclaimed again, slamming his glass on the counter. "For fuck's sake Kotetsu! I'm your brother, you need to learn you can talk to me! Stop trying to handle everything alone and then going on to act all sad about it!"

"It's not an act!"

Muramasa raised an eyebrow.

Kotetsu knew he had to come clean to him, at least. "I...have a therapist..." He hesitated. It was hard to talk about. "And now I take medicine..." Oh, he was so skilled at explaining things. He just stared at his brother, silently begging that he wouldn't have to go explaining all his feelings. Muramasa had to know where it all stemmed from – Wild Tiger's decline in popularity had been evident for years, before he wound up with Barnaby. Tomoe's death had destroyed a part of him and that he'd not been able to hide from anyone to begin with.

He hoped, and hoped and hoped he didn't have to bring up his power loss. If Muramasa could just understand that he felt depressed and was trying to deal with it...

"Antidepressants?"

"Um, yea," Kotetsu nodded miserably. "I tried to avoid them, but I hit my head and even if it feels better now, I..."

"That's when it came down to getting you on them."

Kotetsu nodded and looked at the bar surface.

"Well, I'm glad."

Kotetsu blinked and looked up. "What?"

"If this is what it takes to bring you back to yourself, the you that didn't hide stuff as much and the you that was ridiculous in how enthusiastic and 'wild' you were...good."

"Oh..."

"I miss my little brother," Muramasa said with a sigh.

Kotetsu stared.

"Before you met Tomoe, hell. After you met her...before she died...Kotetsu we would talk. You would see your daughter. You would see me. You understood the importance of your family and kept your head level. I know out there in Stern Bild you have some friends, but no one close to you on that level."

"Well..."

"I think it would be best for you to leave that job and live here."

"I tried that."

"Try again. We'll work harder to figure something out for you."

"But I can't leave Stern Bild."

"What will you leave behind? Being a hero? Why does that matter when it doesn't make you happy?"

"But there's...Stern Bild is where I'm working on getting better."

Muramasa shook his head, then froze. "...You have someone there, don't you? That's the reason you didn't flush those pills or whatever that you were prescribed."

"Um..." Well he was on the right track. Kotetsu doubted he'd have tried if Barnaby hadn't been there. Kotetsu wondered how bad off he would be.

"I don't know if a relationship is...good for you, right now, but if she's helping you get back on track...I can get behind that."

Kotetsu breathed a sigh of relief. He wasn't totally at ease though. His brother had said 'she'. "Yes...yes I am getting help there. There is someone I miss very much who has made me see that getting better would be a beautiful thing." He smiled, thinking about Barnaby and how once the clouds lifted in his mind maybe he could appreciate him even more if that was possible; he would take that precious man into his arms and thank him for absolutely everything.

"I wish your family alone could make you see that."

"Romance is a little different, bro," Kotetsu chuckled. It was true, though. He loved his daughter. He loved his mother. He loved his brother. But family one was sort of required to love due to the nature of the bonds. And it was a different love. He wanted to get better for them, but...their lives would keep going and would be complete without him at the point they'd all reached and his constant distance.

Barnaby was someone who didn't have to love him, who didn't have to care and show any effort, and he did. That made Kotetsu feel good. It lifted his spirits even if it wasn't enough on its own to keep them up there. He missed Bunny...

"I can see that," Muramasa said, breaking his train of thought. "Well, Kotetsu, you can't just come to town telling me about your hot romance and not sharing any details. What's her name? How'd you meet? All that..." he said with a small smile.

"Oh...oh I'm not sure. It's so private."

"A name at least!"

"You won't judge me?"

"Um, not on a name..."

"Promise?" Kotetsu asked, nervous.

"Hell – yes, I promise," Muramasa grumbled. "The name, please?"

"Barnaby," Kotetsu said, making sure he answered quickly and firmly before he clammed up and made up a truly terrible girl's name like Bertha-Gertrudess and was caught for one hell of an embarrassing lie.

Muramasa stared. "Barna...Barnaby Brooks Jr.? Your partner?"

Kotetsu nodded, his cheeks red. "Barnaby. My Bunny. Yes."

"Uh, he knows this too, right?"

"Hey!" Kotetsu snapped. "Of course! We've been together for a while, he's been worried about me and always been there for me, I mean, always since that whole thing with Jake..."

"So you decided to turn around and date your partner?"

"It's not like that," Kotetsu said softly. "I liked him okay I guess when I met him. But he always seemed closed off, like there was something he was trying to deal with – like me. I tried to learn about that and I grew closer to him and now..."

"And now you're in love with a man." Muramasa's voice had a bit of an edge to it.

"Yes..."

"So my little brother is depressed and gay."

"Um, yes. And I really love him, he's such a sweet person, he was so consumed by revenge when we met I don't think he knew how to show it. But he and I-"

"It's your life."

Kotetsu blinked. "Um...?"

"It's your life," Muramasa repeated. "If you've decided to swing the other way in a desperate way to fix yourself, hey, do it. We'll be here when you get through this phase and realize you're no happier."

Their discussion had taken a sudden, very unhappy turn. Kotetsu asked himself why and an answer wasn't hard to find. To him, Barnaby was someone he loved and wanted to spend his life with and he didn't really give a lot of thought to what was between his legs even if he learned later he liked the sight and feel of another man.

To Muramasa, he was a guy who kissed and touched his little brother and crossed into an area that only soft pretty girls should. Another man, unrelated, in their family.

Being gay still had stigma attached to it. People held prejudices against anyone different, be they a NEXT or homosexual. Kotetsu could tell that while Muramasa knew being a NEXT was not a choice, maybe his being with a man in a last ditch effort to be someone else was. Kotetsu knew it wasn't, but that was hard to convey.

"Hey..." Kotetsu said softly. "I know what I'm doing."

"I doubt you do."

"Are you that pissed off I'm dating another man?" Kotetsu said, upset.

Muramasa didn't answer, and Kotetsu waited. He waited one uncomfortable minute, then three, then up to ten, staring at his hands, the clock, his hands, his brother who had turned around...

Finally he stood up. Maybe his brother just needed time. Well, he could take his time, but Kotetsu wasn't going to be approaching him. The ball was in Muramasa's court and when he got over Kotetsu's romantic life he was free to talk to him.

Kotetsu walked back in the rain, which came down more steadily as a cold wind blew. He was glad it was a short walk. Regardless, he wished he had Barnaby at his side, longing for the companionship, warmth, and comfort only he could provide.

His visit didn't really help anything. Kotetsu had been there two days and hadn't heard from his brother since that first night. Kaede didn't want to talk to him either, but she would still reply sometimes, and she didn't always sound angry. She didn't sound particularly interested either, but she wasn't always ignoring him.

The only one he communicated with regularly was his mother, so Kotetsu stayed at home to do that instead of exploring his own town or even going to the cemetery. He knew he needed to visit Tomoe, and would before he left but he wanted to feel a little happier before he went there. If he went in his then current state of frustration and sadness, he knew he'd just collapse on the grave and cry like a child.

It took a lot of courage before he admitted to his mother what was going on with him and Barnaby. She replied with a disinterested "I know." Of course she did. Kotetsu had figured as much. He braced himself to be rejected, but she didn't mind. She asked if they went on any dates, and if Kotetsu at least picked up the check most of the time.

By the end of their conversation, Kotetsu was smiling. His mom treated his relationship with Barnaby similar to the way she did when he was with Tomoe. She invaded way too much of his privacy, picked on him, and told him he'd better take good care of his new love.

At least she understood. Kotetsu tried not to dwell on issues with Muramasa too much. He was concerned about Kaede anyway. He worried about Barnaby too, and made a couple of phone calls. Barnaby was doing well, and he asked Kotetsu just as many questions about his visit as his mother asked about their relationship. That meant a lot of questions and by the end of that second night Kotetsu was exhausted.

He had trouble sleeping on his futon and woke up in the middle of the night for water. As he poured a cup in the kitchen the light came on, temporarily blinding him since he had gotten used to the dark. "Hey hey turn that out Bunny!" he said without thinking.

"...Bunny?"

Last Kotetsu knew, Barnaby didn't sound like a little girl. He turned to see Kaede, his vision slightly blurry as it tried to adjust. "Oh. Sorry Kaede, I'm half asleep...thought you were someone else."

"Who's Bunny?" she asked, getting a cup herself.

"Friend of mine in Stern Bild." She didn't really need to know the truth right there and then. "Must have been thinking about him before I woke up. Are you okay?"

"I just wanted water," she huffed and went to the sink where Kotetsu moved aside slowly.

"Hey, I was just wondering! I got up for some too. Don't you have school tomorrow?"

"Yes. Why?" she asked, glaring as she sipped her water.

"Just curious, because it's so late." And because it was awkward to stand there in silence, but it looked like that's what they were going to do. He hated that. He wanted to connect with Kaede so badly. But he didn't even know her interests aside from ice skating, and he didn't know shit about ice skating. Well, he knew there was something called a triple axel. That had to be better than nothing...

"Dad are you sick?" Kaede asked suddenly, causing Kotetsu to jump a little and slosh some water over the side of his glass.

"What? No honey, I'm fine!" he answered, genuinely surprised by the question. "Why, are you feeling okay?"

"I've seen you take a pill when you were here. And don't even say it was for a headache, because I saw the bottle. It was from a doctor, I could tell with the labeling."

"How could you tell from the labeling?"

"Remember when I got sick and needed those..antibiotics, Grandma called them? They came in a bottle like that. The orange bottle with the white labels." She glared.

Kotetsu made a face. He could get out of it, maybe. After all there were other things that came in orange bottles, right? But he wanted to bond with his daughter, not lie to her. Even if a little girl shouldn't really know about her father's emotional issues, he didn't want to lie. "Yea well...Daddy's not exactly sick..."

Kaede's expression changed to worry, amazingly. "What do you mean?"

"Daddy's just...having trouble feeling happy." That was the easiest way he could think of to put it.

"You're still unhappy?" she asked, surprised.

"A little bit. ...Okay, a lot. But I'm getting better, now."

"You're unhappy like when you came back from work to live here months ago."

"Yes, but it got a little worse. I'm so sorry Kaede! I know you wanted me to feel better when I went back to Stern Bild. It didn't work that way, I wish it had." He felt a little guilty thinking about that, realizing she wanted him to feel happier and he left and it wouldn't have changed at all if not for Barnaby.

"I didn't know..."

"Well, I tried to hide it. Not well enough, but I tried."

"Why!" she demanded. "Why are you such a liar; why do you hide things?"

Kotetsu sighed and put a hand gently on her shoulder. "Kaede, I didn't lie about that to hurt you. This is something you should never have to deal with...not your job to take care of me."

Silence fell again, though not as awkward as it had been before. Kaede gently grabbed his hand and moved it from her shoulder, though she didn't let go. "Dad I want you to be okay...I don't care what's my job."

"Ah, Kaede, you have your own life." His eyes felt wet. "I've been far away for so long now...you have your friends, and Grandma and my brother, your life is already busy and full. I'm not going to walk into it after leaving you alone for so long and tell you to take care of me."

"But I want you to come back. If I have to help you smile it's not...it's not so bad."

"You're so calm," he said, squeezing her small hand. "I thought you were so angry at me."

"I am!" she declared, nearly tugging her hand back, the action half-hearted. "But I get mad because you lie. You're not lying now."

"No...I suppose I'm not."

"This doesn't mean I forgive you!" she said, looking off to the side.

Tears actually did well up in Kotetsu's eyes and he smiled. "Of course not. I need to earn your trust back, I know."

"Yes...so the pills help you?"

"I don't know yet. I have to give them a while."

"Oh...I um, hope you feel better soon, okay? And I- HEY!" Kaede protested as Kotetsu laughed and dragged her into a big hug.

He held her tight, and then he really did cry. It'd been such a long time since he hugged his daughter. She was a piece of his very soul and he felt it more than ever right at that moment, the tears running down his face. "I love you so much Kaede. I'm sorry, so sorry for being so distant."

"Daaaad this is embarrassing!" she said, struggling a little.

"No one can see! And I wouldn't care if they could. I want everyone to know I love you, my beautiful, perfect little girl."

"Daaaad come on quit it quit it quit it!" she protested more and more and he let her go finally.

Kotetsu gave her an affectionate pat on the head, amused at how red she'd turned. "Now that you're good and embarrassed, go back to bed."

"Hmph! Don't even do that again!"

"I can't promise that," he said, smirking even with tears still on his cheeks.

She muttered some more about it being embarrassing, but turned to return to her room. Kotetsu couldn't help but notice she looked happier than she had when she flipped on the light minutes earlier.


	8. In your heart

Everything was calm and good until the fourth day. Kaede had been more open toward him even if she still snapped when he tried to bond too much and was overbearing. But Kotetsu felt happier and he even made it out to see Tomoe's grave, to talk to her, to tell her how happy he was to see Kaede and, the hardest part, to tell her about Barnaby. He felt odd telling her how, in a sense, he had moved on. But somehow he was sure Tomoe would have wanted him to. If he had died and left her a widow, he would have wanted her to find love again. He never wanted her to be alone and be devoid of another warm embrace or urgent kiss. She deserved to be loved forever, and she would be.

He felt good about the visit and came home for dinner with his family. Muramasa didn't show up. Kotetsu didn't care. No one asked about him and Kotetsu didn't volunteer a thing. He loved his brother, but he wasn't going to let any of his intolerance and weird anger affect a good thing.

The fourth day, he woke to a phone call from Barnaby. His Bunny was excited. He was going to go talk to Kriem. Neither of them had been completely sure what happened to her after everything happened months ago. Barnaby had figured she was just arrested and Kotetsu was inclined to agree, and they actually didn't even worry about it. The two biggest threats were dead, Edward ran away, and Kriem was taken care of, likely no longer a threat. She had barely been one to begin with.

Turned out she'd been hurt pretty bad during Lunatic's appearance though none of his fire ever actually hit her. She'd been in a coma for a while, and then recovering. After a time Barnaby was finally told he could go question her if he wanted to. It didn't really matter since he'd accomplished exactly what he wanted. But he and Kotetsu discussed it. Barnaby wanted reasons why his parents had to die, and he deserved to know. Kotetsu told him he loved him and said goodbye, and proceeded to spend the day with Kaede.

They did various things, from watching TV to having lunch together to her telling him all about school and about a sleepover she'd attended not long ago. Everything was going great and Kotetsu smiled all day.

He wasn't really expecting a knock at the door, and when he answered it so the other two could keep relaxing, he was surprised as hell to see a frazzled Barnaby standing in the doorway, his eyes red rimmed and skin pale. He stared at Kotetsu, looking tired and sad and a whole lot of bad emotions rolled into one.

"Bunny!"

"Kotetsu..." Barnaby took two steps forward and collapsed against Kotetsu, who barely managed to stand as he caught him. He stepped back as he held Barnaby's weight and cringed as he heard approaching footsteps.

"Dad who wa- Is that BARNABY! From HeroTV!"

"Um..."

"Why's he here? Is he okay!" she ran over and raised a hand to touch him, though she didn't go through with it as Kotetsu shifted him more so he could carry him slowly further into the house.

"Yes, it's Barnaby, we're friends, okay? I'll explain later. Get Grandma, I have to get him to my futon."

Kaede stared.

Kotetsu growled. "Go, Kaede!"

And then she was off while he continued to manuever Barnaby.

It took a while, but eventually Barnaby was laid out on the futon and Kotetsu was pressing a cool damp cloth to his head. He sat next to Barnaby, yearning to touch and kiss him and try to wake him up in the most loving way possible, but he wasn't going to act like that in front of his mom and daughter. His mom might not care, but it seemed sort of rude.

"Dad why is Barnaby here?" Kaede asked quietly.

"Because...I don't know, actually. We're...good friends, but I have no idea why he came here tonight. It doesn't make any sense. He isn't the type who would take a vacation from HeroTV, ever."

"He looks sick...:"

Kotetsu nodded, worry growing in his chest as he forgot about the cloth and brushed his fingers against Barnaby's forehead. "I hope he's okay..."

"You really have no idea what he came here for?" Anju asked, looking at him.

"No Mom, I honestly don't. I know today he was going to talk to Jake's accomplice, Kriem. I thought that's what he went to do. There's no reason he should be here."

"I see," she said with a nod, accepting the answer without giving any indication that she thought he was hiding something. That was good, because he wasn't.

Barnaby finally stirred about twenty minutes later, opening his eyes and looking confused. Kotetsu immediately held up his hand to keep the other two from starting in immediately on questions. "Bunny?" he said, not caring that they heard him using the nickname.

"Kotetsu...ah, yes, I came to your home didn't, I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."

"Shhh. Don't you worry about that. What happened?" Kotetsu asked, carefully combing his fingers through the blonde hair.

"Kriem told me, told me bad news. I think...I mean, I don't think...Jake may not have been the murderer."

Kotetsu froze, his mother and Kaede gasped and Barnaby's head quickly turned toward them. "Oh...oh sh...crap, Kotetsu, your family!" He sat up quickly. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry to come to your home like this, I just really needed to see Kotetsu, I'll leave as-"

"You aren't going anywhere, young man," Anju said very firmly. "You came all the way here and then fainted into my son's arms. You will stay here until you're better."

"But-"

"Absolutely NO buts," she said firmly and Barnaby's jaw dropped. Kotetsu didn't know if normally he might argue with someone who had the nerve to tell him what to do, but he was glad he didn't even try then.

"Fine."

"Mr. Barnaby are you okay? Why did you come to see my dad? He said you're friends but why did you come all the way here?" Kaede asked her questions rapidly, voice moving so fast that Kotetsu was amazed he could even tell what she said.

"I'm...okay." Barnaby stared at Kaede, studying her. He knew she was Kotetsu's daughter, he had to from the photos in his apartment, but he still was being asked questions by a complete stranger. And then, oddly enough, he smiled a little. "Oh, he says we're friends?"

"Yes...Dad did you lie! I guess not, otherwise you wouldn't have come..."

"No, he didn't lie. He just left out details, for a good reason. But I don't mind..." he looked at Kotetsu, eyes searching his.

Kotetsu wondered if normally, Barnaby would have been willing to admit what was going on. Maybe he would. Kotetsu needed to have faith that he had no desire to hide him like a shameful secret. Regardless, Barnaby needed him in that moment, and he needed him as more than a comforting shoulder.

"I don't either," Kotetsu said as he inched up more so he sat alongside Barnaby.

"I came here, because I love your dad very much," Barnaby admitted, his voice soft. "He's the only one who can help me right now..."

"You..." Kaede stared.

"Sorry for not telling you, Kaede. Barnaby is uh...Daddy's boyfriend..." Kotetsu fidgeted.

"..." Kaede just stared more.

Barnaby took Kotetsu's hand. "I hope you don't mind...he was your dad before he was my boyfriend, after all-"

"DAD'S DATING A FAMOUS PERSON! Wait til everyone at school hears! And BARNABY? King of Heroes!"

"Kaede..." Anju sighed while Kaede hopped up, all smiles.

"And I got to meet you, Barnaby! Please make Dad happy, okay? Please?"

"I uh, I will," Barnaby said, his eyes wider than Kotetsu had ever seen in his life.

"Kaede, it's bedtime," Anju said, and she was right. It had gotten late fast.

"Oh...um..."

"We can talk tomorrow," Barnaby told her, flashing his pretty smile and making Kaede turn red all over.

"Okay! This is so cool, Barnaby's in my house!" she squealed, and Anju stood up with her.

"Yes, he's here, your father will see to him and you can talk tomorrow. Let's leave them alone and get you to bed, okay?"

"Yea...good night Barnaby!" she yelped and waved furiously at him before being escorted off by Anju. Kotetsu heard her giggling as she left and he grinned. He hadn't known what reaction to expect from her but was pleased with the one they got.

"So that's your daughter," Barnaby said, unzipping his jacket then since they hadn't taken it off him. "She's a pretty little girl, Kotetsu."

"She is!" Kotetsu said brightly, standing and taking the jacket. "I'm so proud of her."

"You should be."

"She's so excited to see you. She deserves this, something fun and interesting."

"Yes..."

"But I know that's not why you came...how did you find the house?"

"You gave me the address." Barnaby took off his shirt as well and handed it to Kotetsu. "May I have some water?"

"Oh yea..." Kotetsu remembered giving him the address in case of an emergency. He hadn't dreamed Barnaby would need to use it after all. He set the clothing aside and told Barnaby he'd be right back. He quickly fetched him his water, his head spinning. He was so happy to see him, and he couldn't wait to hold him, but the circumstances that brought Barnaby there genuinely scared him. It had to be something bad. He returned with a glass of water and handed it to Barnaby before sitting down.

Barnaby took his time drinking it, downing the whole glass. He set it on the floor near the futon when finished and laid back, beckoning for Kotetsu to join him. "Everything's gone wrong." He spoke quietly as Kotetsu finally wrapped his arms around him, stretched alongside his body.

"Tell me about it."

"Kriem was kidnapped by Jake years ago, that's how they met."

"Oh ah...weird relationship..." Kotetsu held Barnaby closer, against his chest.

"Yes...but anyway, the day he kidnapped her...was the day my parents were killed. He was with her. He couldn't have been there."

Kotetsu felt like he'd been hit by a train. Only...in the head. "Huh!" How could that be?

"I...I looked into it, and sure enough, she was kidnapped on that day. I thought about it for a while. She's a criminal, making it up to protect him, his dignity, to make me upset – she even said she wants my past to torture...tor..." he choked up and big sobs began to shake Barnaby's body. Kotetsu wished he knew what to for him, finding himself only able to wait and listen and kiss the tears from his cheeks. "Why!" he said, suddenly and loudly. Kotetsu jumped, but kept his hold. "Why Kotetsu? I'm sure...I was sure it was him! I looked at her files and told myself that she had to have been kidnapped by someone else, but my head, my head hurt all of the sudden and where I saw Jake's face it became that blank, smiling demon face again and then turned into the faces of many people I know...why! What's wrong with me!" He sobbed louder and Kotetsu worried someone would hear.

"Bunny..."

"The faces won't stop changing no matter what! I got on the train because I didn't know what to do! Maverick was a few buildings away, but Kotetsu I needed to tell you. I don't understand why this is happening, I don't...have I gone crazy? I waited for that day my whole li...life..." His crying devoured his words and he shook almost violently against Kotetsu.

Kotetsu wished he knew what to say. It wasn't exactly a situation he was familiar with. And he couldn't tell Barnaby it would be all right, under the circumstances. He could say it but Barnaby was too smart for that. He knew they would be words to calm him for the moment, not an effective action and Barnaby was driven to complete his goals, a bit extremely so. "Bunny, you're absolutely sure?" he asked, hands on his face as he brushed the tears away with his fingers then, voice low in Barnaby's ear.

"I'm s-sure, I checked records, and Kriem wouldn't lie to defend Jake, if he did it she'd want to drill the reason, the visual, and guilt for his death into my skull until I wanted to die, although she did the same this way I-"

"No," Kotetsu said, firmly. He kissed Barnaby's long eyelashes. "You don't want to die, no matter how painful your thoughts are."

Barnaby looked at him falling silent. Kotetsu merely looked back, shifting his position more on top of Barnaby. Then Barnaby closed his eyes. "You're right...I don't..."

Kotetsu kissed his lips gently and briefly.

"I have you. Kotetsu I don't know what would happen to me without you. I don't have anyone else."

"You have Maverick."

"He's like my adoptive father...I know...but at the same time he's a reminder that I don't have my real dad. And I'm more comfortable with you."

"I see."

"I mean it, I don't know what I would do if you weren't here."

"I thought...you're King of Heroes, Bunny you're smart, strong, talented, you have so much opportunity. You're...what...twenty-four?"

Barnaby's lips twitched. "Twenty-five, Kotetsu."

"When-"

"Halloween. My birthday is on Halloween."

"Why-"

"Because it's just another day, and I don't want to celebrate it and...you haven't been okay."

That just added to what Kotetsu wanted to say and he felt his stomach drop. "Bunny...you need to do things for yourself – or tell me so I can do them! You're a young guy, you shouldn't hitch yourself so tightly to some old fool like me, so much so that you miss your birthday because I can't handle everyday things."

"Nothing about our job is 'everyday'."

"It is when you've been in it a while...but whatever! There's so much you can do. Please don't drag yourself down, with your own problems or with mine."

"You don't drag me down."

"We never really thought this through...Bunny if I'm just making things worse, I-"

"You're not, okay!" Barnaby yelled suddenly, pushing Kotetsu off him.

Kotetsu rolled to the side, off the futon, sprawled in an undiginified manner and shocked. He sat up, looking at Barnaby.

Barnaby folded his arms over his chest, shaking yet again as his sobs picked back up. "Please don't leave me. I don't have anyone left. Please don't," he said, voice barely audible by then.

"I'm not going to! I was just saying that..."

"Don't, don't even finish that! I love you Kotetsu. You don't hold me back. I didn't celebrate my birthday much before we met. You didn't keep me from anything."

An image flashed across Kotetsu's mind, Night Terror grinning and saying Barnaby was faking, he was upset and didn't know what he was saying. Kotetsu had to think hard to dismiss the grinning face but he did with deep breaths. They were kind of a sad pair, him trying to focus through breathing to stop thinking about a dead guy, and Barnaby crying over his inability to remember. Their sounds were the only sounds Kotetsu could hear. He wondered if the same rang true for his mother and Kaede.

He stood up and Barnaby made a choked sound, watching him. "I'm only turning out the light," Kotetsu assured him. "It doesn't do to have it burning away all night." He wanted to change into some sleeping clothes too, but Barnaby shouldn't be alone. Kotetsu didn't mind. Keeping on his current lounging clothes was not a big deal.

Once the light was out he made his way back easily, used to the room. "Do you want me to come back down there?"

"Yes. Please. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to push you."

"It's okay." Kotetsu dropped down and onto the bed again and Barnaby was immediately in his arms. His stupid problems, his powers, all of that was moot when Barnaby was so upset. He whispered into Barnaby's ear, telling him he loved him and would never leave him, among other words and promises. All things that he meant.

Barnaby tried to return some of his words, but for the most part he cried himself to sleep.

The next morning was better. Barnaby woke Kotetsu up, still in his arms. As they untangled from each other, Kotetsu looked at Barnaby nervously and was relieved to see a smile on his face. "I'm sorry." Barnaby stroked Kotetsu's face. "I acted like a child last night."

"Bunny, don't worry about it. Seriously, don't. I said some stupid stuff too." Kotetsu caught his hand and kissed his fingers.

"You sure did," Barnaby replied and Kotetsu laughed.

"Really, though, I do worry about you. Barnaby? Next year let me celebrate your birthday. Hell, that's far away, let me do something for your Christmas, your New Years...never keep the focus on me."

"Christmas...but...I..."

Kotetsu kissed him. He kissed him slowly, his tongue running over Barnaby's lips before slipping between them. Barnaby's arms wrapped back around him despite the fact they had stopped hugging in an effort to get up. But a good deep kiss...it was exactly what Kotetsu needed. And he was sure Barnaby needed it even more.

The broke apart and Kotetsu leaned his forehead against Barnaby's briefly. "You let me give you a good Christmas again. It's been too long. Your parents wouldn't want you to feel so sad each year."

Barnaby sighed, but relented. "I can't promise I'll love it."

"Just don't fight it."

"...Fine." Barnaby paused. "You're irritating."

"It's one of my best qualities," Kotetsu joked before kissing Barnaby's head. He stood up then so they could get ready for the day – and to avoid Kaede catching them in the middle of any smooching.

With Barnaby in the house, Kotetsu never dreamed of there being any way, any chance in hell that Kaede could be pissed off. But boy was she mad.

Kotetsu had no one to blame but himself. Getting along better with her, having Barnaby be accepted by her and his mother as his lover, things generally going right...he got a swelled head. He tried to parent without thinking maybe it was too much, too soon.

Anju collapsed in the middle of the day. Kotetsu learned that she had many times before and while that was the complete opposite of comforting, at the same time he knew it wasn't the end of the world, that his mother often did push herself too much without clearly thinking it through. He had certainly inherited that flawed willpower.

She hurt her back, and Kaede was worried. It was a weekend and so she was at home. She cried and wanted an ambulance and Kotetsu said no, because he and Barnaby could treat her. Barnaby was far more useful at it. He had learned a lot of rescue and first aid techniques, and while none had been for 'lady hurting her back while watering flowers', his knowledge and focus helped.

"Grandma is fine, okay?" He'd told Kaede, trying to comfort her as Barnaby brought his mother some water.

"But...she fell down...she falls down sometimes."

"It's just her back." He didn't feel like it was that simple, but, he had to water it down for Kaede's sake, he was sure. "She's fine."

"Dad should we call a doctor to make sure?"

"No. You have chores to do, right?"

"Yes but-"

"Well, go do them." At the time, he thought 'wow, I sound like a parent finally!'

"But...but Grandma!"

"Kaede she's fine! Just go sort the clothes, okay? You really need to learn that-"

"Shut up!"

Kotetsu blinked. "Huh?"

"You don't know how much this happens! You just came here!" she shouted, eyes narrowed and wet.

"Grandma told me. She's okay. Now come on, calm down and cut it with this attitude." He folded his arms, acting calm, stern, while he absolutely panicked in his head.

"Attitude?" Kaede's jaw dropped. "I'm worried about her!"

"I know. But why can't you get that she's fine?"

"Go back to Stern Bild!" she snapped.

"...What?"

"You heard me! Just go back! You don't get it!" she shouted more, her voice cracking.

"I do to get it, I...I..."

"You don't even know what to say."

"Well of course I don't!" He didn't. He had no idea. Spending a few days with his girl out of years and years...he really had no idea how to talk to her, still.

It was then that Barnaby walked in. "She said she's going to sleep. And I...um..." He paused and looked between the both of them. "I...Kotetsu, what'd you do?"

"I...hey!" He didn't like that the first instinct Barnaby had was to blame him.

"He..." Kaede fell quiet, cheeks red, clearly embarrassed.

Barnaby looked at her but stayed quiet. Unlike Kotetsu, he seemed to understand he didn't have room to be all parental and superior. "She won't go do her chores," Kotetsu said finally.

"He doesn't get it! Dad doesn't...I'm leaving!"

"Uh, and going where?" Kotetsu asked, frustrated.

"For a walk! By myself! I'm old enough to walk!" she declared, and turned around to leave. Kotetsu started to stop her but his hands hung limply at his sides as he gave up almost immediately, letting her go out the door. Oh well, maybe a walk would help.

Then he looked at Barnaby who was giving him a very dissatisfied look. "What?"

"Kotetsu...couldn't you have gone easier on her?"

"She needs to learn!"

"Learn what? Not to worry? That's stupid."

"No, she needs to learn not to...panic..."

"That was hardly panic," Barnaby snorted. "Your mom collapses a lot. That's scary. I used to worry when Aunt Samantha got sick even if it was just a cold. Same with Maverick."

"Why?" Kotetsu asked, knowing he sounded dumb. He knew why. And yet, he still asked.

"Because it's scary Kotetsu! When you're a kid and something happens to an adult or caretaker when you've already lost a parent or...or both of them."

"Bunny..." Kotetsu started toward him.

"No. No you wait til she gets back and then you apologize to her," Barnaby said.

"But-"

"NO. Just...don't talk to me." His eyes were dark, a frown on his face, and it made Kotetsu's stomach ache. That wasn't a good look, and wasn't quite like any he had seen before on Barnaby's face.

"Um...seriously?"

"Yes seriously! You have to learn to think about this stuff."

"Learn? Gee, thanks Bunny, I forgot that I'm a five year old."

"I never said you were."

"Sure comes off that way," Kotetsu growled, looking away.

"If you're not, then stop acting like one," Barnaby said shortly and stormed out of the room.

Kotetsu was left standing there wondering what he did wrong and drowning himself in self pity, all the while completely aware that he effortlessly fucked up again.

Barnaby got Anju to her bed where she could take a nap. And then he was on the couch, staring at their television and looking bored. He only came there for Kotetsu, who he wasn't talking to. Kaede wasn't around...the whole mood in the house was terrible. Kotetsu sat on the couch too though he left space between him and Barnaby. He looked at him several times, studying him, hoping he would meet his eyes. Barnaby either didn't notice him or ignored him. Kotetsu was willing to bet it was the latter.

An hour into sitting there he wondered how long Kaede's walk would be. She was a kid, and probably played outside for long periods. He used to do that. He would often stay outside until he needed to come in for dinner. His current concern was Barnaby.

"Bunny?" he finally asked, voice small. Barnaby twitched but didn't answer. "Bunny please, I'm sorry. You were right, I...don't really know what I'm doing."

Barnaby proceeded to ignore him some more.

"I thought I was telling her the right thing. I guess I don't know why..."

Barnaby sighed. "If you don't know why, I have no idea how to help you. You can't just say 'sorry' and think it's all okay. You have to know why you're sorry."

"I think I know that."

"You just said-"

"I said I didn't know why I told her it was okay. But what am I supposed to say? I can't tell her the world sucks and Mom's back will always hurt."

"No, but you need to develop a better tactic."

"How would you want to hear it?"

"...I'm your boyfriend, not your son!" Barnaby said, once again aggravated. He stood up. "Dammit Kotetsu! She had the right idea. I need to go on a walk too, I need to get away from you for a little while."

"Bunny I wasn't implying anything!" No, he definitely did not see himself as a parental figure to Barnaby. Hell, out of the two of them, if they needed to label it then Kotetsu was definitely the child. Barnaby understood things a bit more realistically.

That didn't stop Barnaby, who still left, and Kotetsu remained alone on the couch. Even he thought about leaving, but what if his mom needed help? And going on a walk would do nothing. He'd be alone outside or alone inside and he didn't feel good.

The worst part was, as depressed as he felt, he also felt guilty. He'd messed up. But he couldn't stop sitting around and hating on himself with a good dose of self-pity. When he did something bad, he should fix it. He shouldn't cry and whine about it and feel unloved.

But it was a viscous cycle. In the end he didn't even move from the couch, only sinking to lay down on it. He couldn't actually do anything without Kaede or Barnaby there. He had to talk to them. That was all that could be done. Crushing realization settled on him as he started to think about his powers as well. He'd lose them, and fail as a hero. He failed as a father. How long until he failed as a lover and lost Barnaby?

He lost track of time. The door opened after what he thought was maybe an hour, and Barnaby walked in looking a little better. He stopped when he saw Kotetsu lying on the couch. Kotetsu looked back at him and said nothing.

"Kaede home yet?" Barnaby asked, sounding too casual for Kotetsu's liking.

"No."

Barnaby frowned. "It's sort of late."

"What time is it?"

"A little after four..."

Kotetsu tried to remember what time Kaede had actually left. He couldn't remember, but if Barnaby thought it had been too long, it probably was. He sat up. "I better go find her."

"I'll go with you."

Kotetsu nodded, but then he remembered he needed to make sure his mother was okay. "Be right back..."

He hurried to her bedroom, where she was awake and reading a book. "Mom?" he asked, surprised to see her so calm, happy, even.

"Yes?" she asked, not looking away from her book.

"Mom Kaede has been gone a while."

She looked at her book some more, and then finally to him. "Sometimes she stays out for a while. But it is strange for her to go so long without checking in, especially on days where I've scared her..."

"Mom..."

"Better go find her, then. Call your brother. He knows some of her favorite haunts."

"Erm...can't you tell me?"

"I'm around the house most of the time. Your brother takes her places and is active with her, on hikes especially. You ask him. You two haven't talked for a few days now."

"Yea well..."

"Whatever happened, you need to stop being children and figure it out as men."

That was sort of the problem, though Kotetsu didn't say it. "Fine," was all he said instead.

Ten minutes later he was walking with Barnaby, asking various residents on the street if they'd seen his daughter. It was a small town, so when he said the name 'Kaede' he instantly got reactions. Most good, none bad, some just neutral. Well, he supposed, she was his perfect daughter, not everyone else was required to light up at her name.

It was getting cold and he wrapped his brown coat tighter around himself. For a minute he actually thought he was so cold he was seeing spots, before he realized it was spitting snow. That made him finally do what he was supposed to do all along, and pull out his cell phone.

"Calling my brother," he informed Barnaby. His partner had barely spoken the whole time they were out walking. As worried as he was for his daughter, Barnaby's silence and the forced communication with Muramasa made him so worried he was a little numb.

Muramasa picked up on the fourth ring. "Hello?" He didn't sound annoyed, angry, sleepy...anything. He just sounded blank.

"Hey, it's...your...brother." The words sounded awkward. "Um..." He looked at Barnaby who gave him a surprised, worried look. "Look, is Kaede with you?"

"No. Why?"

He had hoped it would be just that easy. "I sort of pissed her off today-"

"So surprising," Muramasa interupted.

"...Anyway, she went for a walk, it's getting late, cold, snowy, she's been gone way too long...we thought you'd have an idea of where she went."

"I have several."

"Yes?"

"Meet me at the store, and I'll search with you."

"But...!" Kotetsu started to protest, but his brother hung up quickly and suddenly. "Muramasa..." he said with a sigh, staring at the phone. He folded it and then to his surprise, Barnaby's hand closed over his.

"Kotetsu?"

"We're going to go meet my brother at the family store."

Barnaby stared at him. "Something's going on...what is it?" Barnaby asked calmly. He didn't sound pissed that Kotetsu had held something back. He sounded genuinely concerned.

"Look, my brother knows about you and I. I had to tell him. He was...not pleased when I told him."

"Oh..."

"I only called him to help us tonight. I don't give a shit whether or not he approves. I love you Barnaby, I love you far too much for judgements from my family. There's a lot about me they can't accept, and that's fine, except for when it comes you."

"I...see..."

Kotetsu wasn't sure where that second wind came from, but telling Barnaby about what happened in the store that first night, telling him he loved him as they made their way to meet Muramasa – he felt something slip back into place even if it would only stick around temporarily. The good thing was that Barnaby listened to him, he squeezed his hand and while silent, it was clear he was no longer in the mood to lecture Kotetsu.

When they saw Muramasa outside the store, Barnaby did tense up, and Kotetsu frowned. But he kept on holding Barnaby's hand, almost making a point of it as they got closed. It was kind of approaching on aggressive hand holding by that point, and he let go. "Muramasa, this is Barnaby. Barnaby...Muramasa," he said, giving quick introductions.

"It's good to me-"

And then Barnaby had to show his pissed off side. "So, I hear you aren't a fan of me being with your brother."

"Uh..." Muramasa's jaw dropped.

"I don't know what the hell that's all about, but I'm not going anywhere. I don't know you. Your opinion wouldn't matter if you weren't related to him."

"Bunny.." Kotetsu cringed.

"Unfortunately, it has to matter a little, and so this sort of sucks. But I'm not going. If you want me out of your brother's life, I don't know what to tell you. What we do together doesn't mean shit for whatever you do every day, so why get upset about it?"

"That's not-" Muramasa tried but Barnaby still kept on, glaring.

"I love your dork of a brother. I don't care if he's turning several shades of red right now." And he was. Kotetsu was crimson and pink. "I love him too much to let someone else's opinion of orientation get in the way. Kotetsu and I being together has nothing to do with him being depressed. He didn't go gay when Tomoe died, we really have something. Maybe someday you'll understand," he downright snarled. "I know I do. I've never felt this way about anyone. I can't tell you your brother's exact thoughts, I don't think anyone really knows what the hell is going on in there half the time, but I can tell you I know he's being honest, he's being true when he's with me. He didn't cling to me as some floating device to save him. We found something...and we're not giving it up." Then he closed his mouth, clearly done.

Kotetsu decided it wasn't the best time to mention that he thought Barnaby really did save him.

Muramasa stared back at Barnaby, both men refusing to break the angry gaze. Then he sighed and dropped is eyes. "I was never mad at him for being gay. Or for being with you, take your pick.."

Barnaby continued to look angry, but Kotetsu perked up a little. "Huh?"

"Kotetsu, you can go be the gayest man you want to be. I'm not really that worried about it. It was a surprise. I don't even know you anymore. I had a brother who laughed and spent time with his pretty wife. This is a lot different than things used to be."

Kotetsu searched for words. He didn't know what to say, and felt like an asshole for the thoughts he'd had about his brother. Not finding a suitable response, he instead said, "Well, it's not hard to imagine Barnaby as a pretty wife." It was accidental, but he didn't really feel bad.

"Hey! After all I...after defending..." Barnaby glared at him, indignant.

Muramasa however, remained blank-faced for a few seconds. Then a smile tugged at his lips. "No, he's a bit too mannish for me to do that."

"Thank...wait..." Barnaby paused, his turn to blush as if he wasn't sure if he should be offended or thanking Muramasa.

Kotetsu giggled, he honest to God giggled and Muramasa rolled his eyes. "Kotetsu, go be gay or go be a girl or go...have a hat fetish. I really won't judge you for it. I just wonder about the type of person you are, okay?"

"Hat fetish," was the only reply Kotetsu got out before Barnaby suddenly pointed between them, toward the hills that lay behind the store.

"What's that?" he asked, too calmly, because Kotetsu could tell his temper was spiked and he was unsure of how to react to the way Muramasa responded to his lecture.

Kotetsu turned to see smoke coming from the trees, where he knew a popular shrine was. He frowned. "Must be a fire." It felt odd to see a fire when the snowflakes were becoming larger, but he knew that the cold weather was when they were more common. Still...something about it wasn't right.

"A fire..." Muramasa repeated, staring. His stare lingered a bit too long. Kotetsu knew they should make a call of some sort, since the fire looked to have gotten big.

"Where's your phone, Muramasa?" Kotetsu asked. "We need to-"

"Kaede likes that shrine an awful lot. She goes there often, especially when she's upset.

Kotetsu froze. "Um...you mean uh..."

"I mean, I'll get to the phone. You and Barnaby-"

He didn't need to finish. Barnaby activated his powers and was off in a blue streak. Kotetsu activated his too, but lingered. He was scared, very scared at the realization his daughter could be by that fire. But Barnaby was off. And he had time, just to say, "Sorry. I'm sorry I thought you-"

"I don't see how you could have thought anything else, given my beahvior."

"Yea..."

Muramasa hurried inside. "Go, Kotetsu, just go. Barnaby's good. He's cleared just in how worried he seems to be about Kaede – I'm making the call, so go!"

Kotetsu felt like a gunshot had gone off. He nodded and then rushed off himself.

He arrived at a mess. Trees on fire, fallen down. The smoke and ashes mixed with the snow and visibility was poor. Kotetsu wasn't near the fire but he could feel the heat, ridiculously strong and almost enchanting, beckoning him to come near. That he didn't understand, but he didn't fall for it.

Barnaby stood frozen. He didn't like fire. Kotetsu knew that. But more than that, even with their powers they couldn't just pick up burning trees. They needed protection. What to do...

Suddenly, Barnaby sprang into action again and took off to the right, circling around the burning trees. Kotetsu registered the sharp crack of a branch and then a loud scream – he immediately followed Barnaby. They got around some of the burning trees and found an area where there were still fallen trees and obstacles, but the fire had not fully attacked that particular area. It would anytime.

In front of them Kotetsu could see a small building, the honden, and he could see a figure crouched just in front of it. The figure was glowing blue, and Kotetsu wondered if they'd found the right person. They got closer, Barnaby shoving some branches aside and making a path and then Kotetsu could see that yes – indeed that was his Kaede. She was a NEXT!

He didn't have time to dwell on it. A loud crack resounded overhead and he and Barnaby froze as a large tree came toward them, flames streaming behind it. Kotetsu swore and rushed to catch it, stop it, even if the burn would hurt. Barnaby could get Kaede and they could get away from that horrible place.

Except that, the tree crushed Kotetsu down. He sank under its weight, his back bending painfully as he shouted in surprise. He took a few seconds to note that his glow had vanished, his strengh began to quickly go back to not only that of a normal human but less, as he began to tire. Then the tree fell faster and he was sure he would be crushed.

Barnaby caught it. Barnaby caught the tree, picked it up, and threw the thing. Throwing a burning tree in the forest was nowhere near the best idea but Kotetsu didn't care. He lurched forward, his vision swimming. He was inahling smoke, too much smoke, and as Kaede seemed to wilt before him he could tell she had too.

The only one doing well was Barnaby. He had Kotetsu in one arm, Kaede in the other. Before Kotetsu knew it they were flying out of there as a firetruck raced their way, the sirens blaring and the cold stinging his eyes.

"I was so mad. So mad and I couldn't stop glaring. I opened my hand swat at a snowflake because I kept thinking the flakes were little bugs, and a small fire came out! So I wondered if I could do it again, tried really hard, and kind of...let out a fireball..."

"I...see."

Kotetsu, Kaede, and Barnaby rested in the living room. Father and daughter had been treated for smoke inhalation, briefly, but they were okay. Barnaby sat on the couch while Kotetsu on the floor, between his partner's legs with his back against the couch. Kaede sat in front of him in her pajamas. She looked exhausted. Kotetsu felt exhausted.

"So that's what happened...I didn't mean to..."

"You're not in trouble," Kotetsu assured her. No one had really questioned her. No matches, no fire starting material had been found at the site or even on Kaede, so no one had real reason to claim she'd set the fire. He glow had faded before they had gotten to where the truck and the policemen following could see them. "So you're a NEXT...Daddy's little firestarter!" he said fondly.

"I guess so...I don't really know what to do..."

Luckily for them, they had a resource in town. "You know Mr. Easterbrooks, who lives a few houses from the school?"

"Of course, I saw him today!"

"He can make fire as well." Not as powerful as Nathan, but he left that out. "He'll have advice for us, for you!"

Kaede brightened. "Yea...yea I bet he will! He's always so nice to me, I know he won't mind me ask...asking..." she yawned loudly.

"Young lady, you need sleep," Kotetsu said.

"But..." she tried to protest.

"Kaede, get some sleep. You must be exhausted. When I first found my powers, I went so haywire I was exhausted for days," Barnaby said softly. He spoke for the first time in an hour.

"Okay...and you want to talk to Dad, don't you?" she said, smiling. "I mean...you two want to sit around and kiss, don't you!"

"Um, no, no it's not like that," Kotetsu said nervously.

Barnaby pet his head. "I do feel like kissing him, quite a bit. But I can see that you're tired. And I want to talk to him in private before he passes out. You're both exhausted."

"I'm not...not..." Kaede yawned again.

Kotetsu laughed. "Go see your grandma. She was worried all day but she's still in there reading...she missed you, I'm sure."

"Fine." Kaede stood, said good night, and walked out of the room.

Kotetsu laughed a little more and leaned his head back, looking up at Barnaby. "She's a NEXT! My girl is a NEXT..." He was so proud!

"Yes." Barnaby's leaned forward and over him, cradling his face. "That's wonderful, Kotetsu," he said with a smile.

"Amazing..."

"Kotetsu? I need to know what happened today."

"We talked about all of it pretty well, I thought," Kotetsu said coldly as his mood threatened to go back down. They had talked several times, before Barnaby walked out, then on their way to the store, a little when the paramedics checked them...

"That tree, why did it fall on you?"

"Sometimes, gravity-"

"Cut the crap Kotetsu! You should have been able to hold that tree! But you went down. Your powers went...went out, didn't they? But you activated after me. You should have lasted a few seconds longer, not..."

"Ah, they just sort of weakened and I-"

"Tell me the truth!" Barnaby snapped, and leaned back. "Please Kotetsu, trust me to...tell me. You know you can tell me anything, anything at all."

"I can't tell you this."

"Kotetsu!"

"My powers are declining, okay!"

"...What?"

"They've been declining. The time goes down, more and more. I can't do five minutes anymore. Barely even four minutes."

"...Why?"

Kotetsu leaned forward and turned, sitting back on his knees. "How the fuck should I know? They just started doing this, because apparently I don't feel miserable enough!"

"When?"

"Not long ago. Shortly before the incident with Rotwang and that android..."

"The android...the one that beat you so badly."

"Don't remind me." Kotetsu stared down at the floor. "I feel fucked up enough with them going. So lecture me later on not telling you."

"How come you didn't tell me? Kotetsu..." The disappointment in Barnaby's voice was painful.

"I'm already a burden. I don't need to be one when we're trying to help people. I don't need to throw out yet another way you need to deal with me, something else to bug you."

"Hey, come on." Barnaby patted the couch beside him. He couldn't hide the shock and pity that was in his eyes, and that made Kotetsu feel worse.

"Bunny someday I'm going to fail you. We've worked on the five minute limit. You can't depend on me now, I...I'm nothing."

"Kotetsu, you get up here right now." It was an order. A demand, not something that Kotetsu wanted to disobey. He crawled onto the couch much like a guilty animal.

He nearly yelped like one as he was dragged into a fierce hug. "Hey!"

"I don't know what I can do."

"Huh?"

"Kotetsu, you're not a burden. You'll never be a burden. We adjusted to not working well together to begin with. We'll adjust again. We'll do our best, and you'll never hold me down. You bug me all the time Kotetsu, but shit, this isn't the kind of thing...your power loss makes me sad, for you, but it doesn't bug me. This attitude..."

"I know." Kotetsu sighed and sunk into Barnaby's arms. It was hard to say how he felt. Relief, that Barnaby didn't freak out and hate him. Love, fear, they were both there.

"You need to stop thinking so low of yourself. Stop hating yourself. Kotetsu you've done so much for me." Barnaby kissed him on the lips. "So much." Another kiss. "Stop thinking about how bad you are. That's what hurts for me. I don't like it when you beat yourself up. I don't want to be with someone who does that." He kissed him again quickly. "But I want to be with you, always."

"Bunny...I know. I'm sorry."

"I know you're trying." Barnaby laid back on the couch, bringing Kotetsu with him. Kotetsu adjusted and laid stretched out on top of Barnaby.

"I am."

"I wish I could help with your powers..." The kissing moved to his neck.

"I wish you could too. But what do we..."

"We can plan, go over that later." Barnaby's hands pulled at Kotetsu's shirt.

Kotetsu was surprised, but not opposed, and he raised himself up so that Barnaby could pull the shirt over his head. Then Barnaby proceeded to strip off his own shirt. He reached for Kotetsu and pulled him firmly down against him. Their chests pressed together and Kotetsu's breath came a little faster, or at least it did until Barnaby's mouth found his again, armed with his tongue that time.

Barnaby kissed him deeply, for a long time, his hands roaming Kotetsu's back. His fingertips dipped slightly under the waistband of Kotetsu's pants which elicited a small moan from Kotetsu.

The kiss ended and Barnaby grabbed the back of his head with one hand, his fingers working through his hair. "Your powers...they're...important but..."

Kotetsu's lips found Barnaby's neck which made it hard for him to talk. But he tried to be gentle, let Barnaby finish what he wanted to say.

"They're..how we met...not why I love you. They're...I love you, powers or not."

Kotetsu kissed him fiercely, tears stinging his eyes at Barnaby's words. He forgot how good he had it sometimes. Even if everything else went wrong, Barnaby was there, he was right. He was sweet and soft and warm and squirming beneath Kotetsu. A treasure. Kotetsu found his neck again and his hands freely explored Barnaby, for once not worried about the future.

Kotetsu woke up feeling great the next day. He and Barnaby had made it back to the futon before any heavier petting and fooling around started, though they still didn't exactly have a private space. They were naked under the covers which wasn't a great idea. It didn't matter. Kotetsu didn't care. That's why they had a few big blankets. He stared at his partner's sleeping form and touched his shoulder.

The previous night, Kaede had been talkative, nice. Kotetsu had a feeling that while he may not be exactly forgiven, she wasn't mad at him either. The issue with Muramasa was cleared up, for the time being. Kotetsu knew he needed to sit and talk with his brother again. Not about anything in particular. He just needed to spend time with him.

Those things combined, and of course Barnaby...

He smiled like a dufus and gently shook him. Barnaby groaned. "Wake up, come on Bunny, wake up." Kotetsu urged.

"Cold," Barnaby replied and tried to pull the blankets closer around himself.

Kotetsu reached for his pants. Luckily they were easy to reach. It was cold, when he had to reach outside the blankets. It was December after all. He hauled his pants under the blankets and pulled them on there. Once half kind of dressed he rolled out.

"Noooo," Barnaby moaned with his arm out, reaching.

"I'm getting your pants," Kotetsu told him. "Then you can get out of bed and take a nice hot shower,: he assured him.

"Why can't I get out...ooh." Barnaby looked under the covers as if just noticing he was naked. He smiled sheepishly up at Kotetsu who just laughed and went to the living room. He was relieved to see no one in there. He didn't want his mom asking why Barnaby's pants and shirt were on the floor leaving something that resembled a trail.

He snatched up his pants and brought them back to Barnaby, throwing them on the bed and watching tiredly as Barnaby's cell phone bounced out of the pocket. "Oops."

"You could have broken that!" Barnaby complained, and reached for it. He checked his phone with both eyes half open, still trying to wake up. "I missed a call."

"How could I have broken it? Futons aren't hard. Otherwise you wouldn't have slept like a sexy naked baby."

"Oh, ew, Kotetsu that doesn't sound right."

"Yea...anyway who called? Maverick?"

"He was one of the callers. Aunt Samantha called too...they must be worried. I left a message for Maverick before I left...I haven't checked my phone in a while..." Barnaby frowned. "That was dumb. I need to check it often."

"Maverick will understand," Kotetsu assured him. He wasn't really sure of it, though. Barnaby was a big star, top hero...and he just took off. Maverick might be pissed. He just hoped the other heroes has done well in his absense and that nothing big came up and Maverick covered for Barnaby's lack of appearance – after all, there had to have been interviews he was scheduled for. "Anyway, I think we should go get in a nice warm shower...use a lot of soap to...hey, who are you calling?"

Barnaby had his phone to his ear. "Not calling anyone this early. Samantha left me a voicemail."

"Oh." Kotetsu sat down on the futon to wait.

Barnaby was listening to his phone for a little under a minute, then he hung up with a frown. "I'll need to charge the battery while we shower, and call her back a little later in the morning."

"Is everything okay?"

Barnaby changed into his pants under the blanket as Kotetsu had before. "I'm not sure. She sounded alarmed and said she wanted to show me a picture next time we talked. She said it was very important. She called yesterday afternoon...she must be so worried."

Kotetsu rubbed his back lazily with one hand. "Once she hears you're okay she'll understand."

"I don't know if I'm okay..."

"What do you mean?" Kotetsu asked.

"I know I'm acting okay. But I've been distracted here, with you, and especially with what happened yesterday. I feel like if I stayed here I could escape reality...but I don't want to, even though I know going back to Stern Bild means facing everything that's gone wrong..."

"I see..."

"I need to go back today, Kotetsu. I'm sorry I can't stay longer."

Kotetsu smiled. "I understand. I'll be back soon too. I have my work to return to, and...you. Staying home, retiring is tempting, but I couldn't be without you."

"Kotetsu..."

"We'll talk more in the shower, what do you say?"

Barnaby sighed, though he looked happy. "I'm not going to be able to think in there."

Kotetsu shrugged and stood up. "That's kind of the idea, my little Bunny."

"You shouldn't use 'little' you-"

"Fine, well-hung Bunny."

Barnaby blushed and stood up to follow him into the shower.

"This doesn't make any fucking sense!"

"Bunny!" Kotetsu shot a worried glance toward Kaede, who had a shocked look on her face. "Watch your language!"

"Watch my language! How the hell do I do that, huh? You think I can calm down enough to do that? This makes no sense!" he repeated, though he seemed to have done what Kotetsu asked. "I clearly remembered..." He trailed off, his eyes still wide and almost crazy looking, hands shaking as he held his phone.

Samantha had sent him a picture. Barnaby paused when he got it, but when he hung up the phone, he exploded. Kotetsu had been at his side immediately to see a picture of a very young Barnaby standing with a younger Samantha in front of a Christmas tree.

Barnaby had claimed he spent that entire day with Maverick, not Samantha. That was the day his parents were killed.

"Is it possible that-"

"That I'm not remembering correctly? No, Kotetsu, it's not," Barnaby hissed. "Maverick has always backed me up. So something is fucked up!"

"Bu-"

"It's okay Dad, I've heard bad language before." Kaede blinked. She looked troubled, though. "Um, I'm going to be outside," she told them and walked off. Kotetsu understood. It wasn't something she wanted to be there for, whatever was going on with Barnaby.

It worried him too. "Call Maverick."

Barnaby was already dialing. And then he yelled, "MAVERICK!"

Kotetsu cringed, staying near Barnaby as he proceeded to yell into the phone. It was surprising, even in anger Barnaby had shown he could stay calm. But he was freaking out, his hand shaking so much by then that Kotetsu wondered how he successfully held the phone to his ear.

"It's Aunt Samantha! Why would you ever say...IT WAS SAMANTHA!" he was yelling, tears going down his cheeks by then.

"Come on..Bunny, yelling into the phone-"

"SHUT UP!" Barnaby said, jerking his head away from the phone and toward Kotetsu. As soon as he did that, he fell silent, his mouth still open and eyes still wide, more confused looking.

Kotetsu tried not to be bothered by the snap, Barnaby was upset, but it did sting. "Fine."

Barnaby slowly brought the phone back to his ear, speaking calmly. "Yes. No. No! Alright. I'll be back this evening, then I want you to tell me the truth. All of it. NO. Tonight. I can't get there faster. Yes, I'll come directly to your place." He slammed the phone shut then.

Heavy silence descended over them, Barnaby shaking and crying without a sound as Kotetsu stared, unsure of what to even do for him. He didn't want to get snapped at again and he didn't want to make it worse. He just stood there.

He didn't have to stand around for long. Barnaby put a hand to his face to wipe away his tears. He sniffed and then turned himself into Kotetsu's chest. Kotetsu hesitantly embraced him, and when Barnaby began loudly sobbing he tightened his arms. "Shh, Bunny, I'm here."

"I remember...I remember...now I see Samantha in my memory...I come home with Samantha and my parents are dead and fire..." He clung tightly to Kotetsu as he cried.

"We'll get this figured out," Kotetsu said quietly. "If you're memory has been changing, maybe it means you're finally remembering."

"Why would Maverick...?"

"Maybe he thought it was better to go along with your memory."

Barnaby sniffed loudly and grossly. Kotetsu worried for his shirt. "Maybe he did...Kotetsu I don't know where I grew up."

"Huh?"

"I don't...I thought Maverick raised me...now I don't think so...I see..uh..."

Kotetsu waited for him to finish. But he didn't, so he prompted him. "You see...?"

"A bedroom, other kids..."

"Ah..."

Barnaby took deep breaths as he tried to collect himself, but he kept crying. He tried to form some more words but it just didn't work. He gave up and stayed attached to Kotetsu. There was nothing either of them could do at the moment, Kotetsu was sure. He thought about taking Barnaby out to retrace his memories, but he couldn't just leave Kaede. He had to go back soon, but he couldn't just leave her that day.

It had to be a good thirty minutes before Barnaby stepped away. "Kotetsu...I have to go..."

Kotetsu nodded. "I understand."

"And you...?"

"I can't leave right away, Bunny, but I can leave tomorrow morning. ...Will you..."

"I'll be okay. Please stay another night with your daughter...she is a precious fan of mine, after all."

That made Kotetsu smile a little. "Yes, she is."

"I will go back, go see Maverick, and call you."

"Sounds like a plan." He still wondered if Barnaby would be fine.

"Don't worry too much about me."

"Bunny..." How could he keep from doing that?

"No, really, you have enough to deal with."

"..." Kotetsu didn't really reply to that. His issues didn't make Barnaby's smaller, not by a long shot. But at the same time, he couldn't tell Bunny what he'd just told him. 'don't worry too much about me'. There was nothing to say.

And he still didn't have much to say a couple of hours later as he and Kaede saw Barnaby off from the train station. Muramasa gave them a ride, but stayed in the van.

"Mr. Barnaby I hope you'll be okay!" Kaede was saying, shuffling. "I'm really happy you visited and that you're dating my dad."

"I enjoyed my visit, with the exception of yesterday," Barnaby replied.

"Sorry..." Kaede mumbled and looked down.

"Not your fault," Barnaby told her, placing a hand on her shoulder. Kaede blushed. "You were upset and...it doesn't matter, you're fine now."

"Yea..."

"I will come back. Next time I will come with Kotetsu to begin with," he said, redirecting his gaze to his partner.

"Oh, hell yes you will! After all this is straightened out I want to plan something..." Kotetsu smiled.

Barnaby smiled back, a bit sadly. "Yes..."

Kotetsu felt his stomach drop. Barnaby's response...combined with the sound of the arriving train...it wasn't right. He couldn't find any other words as the train pulled up. A big part of him doubted that Barnaby would be okay.

When the train stopped Kaede said goodbye, looked at her father, and went back to the van. Kotetsu got it. It was time for his goodbye and she didn't want to watch them kissing. He reached for Barnaby. Everything felt wrong as he drew him close and kissed him gently. It was as if he would never see him again, even though it would only be about a day.

Kotetsu closed his eyes after the kiss, their faces just an inch apart."Bunny, I have this weird feeling...look, be careful when you get to Stern Bild, okay?"

"I will...why?" Barnabu asked him.

"Just...I don't know, actually. Just please be careful."

"I will." Barnaby fidgeted with Kotetsu's collar as the train car opened its doors. "I'll call you.

"Okay..."

"Kotetsu I have to get on."

"I know."

Bunny was free to go but he paused anyway, looking at Kotetsu. Eventually he gave him a second, quicker kiss and turned away to get on the train. They watched each other until the doors closed. Barnaby showed up in a window then hanging out and waving. Kotetsu waved back, his stomach unsettled as Barnaby grew smaller and smaller. When he was out of sight Kotetsu just felt empty. Having no further business on the platform, he went back to the van.

He fell asleep pretty early that night, dozing on the couch with his phone nearby. It was not a good sleep.

Sparkles poured from Night Terror's hands as he told Edward that Kotetsu was an easy toy, very little self worth and all. Someone who knew he didn't deserve much of anything. Night Terror turned to Kotetsu's prone form and smiled.

Barnaby appeared briefly, leaving again. He was on the train and going farther and farther away. When he was gone a voice repeated over and over that Kotetsu would never see him again. He was gone. And in his nightmare Kotetsu believed it. He could feel the strangeness from earlier in the day when he said goodbye. He shouldn't have Barnaby go.

His dreams were broken suddenly by the loud ring of his phone. Kotetsu snapped awake, his body cold and a feeling of doom all over him as he tried to adjust to the real world. He answered the phone after a few seconds. "Ehhhh 'lo?" he managed, his tongue heavy and tired.

"Kotetsu." Barnaby's voice.

Kotetsu woke up a little more. "Bunny! How are you doing?"

"Don't come to Stern Bild." It was then Kotetsu noticed how quietly Barnaby spoke, barely above a whisper.

"I..huh?"

"It's not safe. Stay home."

"I don't understand. Are you okay?"

"Kotetsu he'll hurt you. I'm going to try to find you. Not at your home. But I promise I'll find you."

"He?"

"Maverick, he..." Barnaby's voice dropped to a whisper. "They're coming back."

"They?"

Barnaby's voice was thick. "Kotetsu, don't come back to Stern Bild. I love y-"

The sounds of a scuffle and then silence. Kotetu held the phone, stunned. He didn't know what just happened...was he still in a nightmare? No, he knew he wasn't. Extreme worry gnawed at him, and then absolutely flooded him.

Kotetsu got no sleep that night. He paced, he tried to call Barnaby back, with no results. He paced more. He drank a beer. He felt too sick for another. He paced more.

That morning he said a hasty goodbye to Kaede and Anju. He boarded the train back to the city, completely ignoring Barnaby's wish for him not to return.


	9. In your mind

Stern Bild seemed normal. Kotetsu wasn't sure what to expect when he got off the train. The city was there, loud as ever in the afternoon. People moved about, rushing as if each and every one of them had somewhere to be. Kotetsu made himself one of them, bee-lining it to Barnaby's apartment. Realistically it was probably the least safe place to go if Barnaby had warned him not to go back. Regardless, he couldn't help himself.

People looked at him strangely as he hurried. Did he really look that much different than the others rushing about? Kotetsu wondered if he had something on his face. He made a mental note to check the first mirror he came across, though he didn't care about that. He needed to get to Barnaby's.

He got there quickly enough and entered the passcode to get in. He took a deep breath, and walked in and-

Nothing. It was normal. It was empty as usual, with his lone chair and the big television screen. Kotetsu made his way in slowly. There could be an ambush. He searched every corner, every inch, and found nothing. There was no evidence of Barnaby even making it home and he supposed that made sense. Barnaby had likely gone straight to Maverick's.

Kotetsu checked the mirror and saw nothing on his face. He frowned and left. Why was he getting all the odd looks?

He found his answer soon enough as he walked back to the street. One of the giant television screens mounted on a city building blasted the 'special report' music and mentioned a murderous NEXT.

Kotetsu stared with everyone else. He didn't expect Samantha's face to show up there, as murder victim number one. He was reeling from that when Barnaby's face showed up as the second victim of a 'gruesome attack'."

Kotetsu's mind was too busy going directly into panic mode for him to listen. Bunny, his Bunny, he was...he couldn't move his mouth to scream, to yell a name, to do anything. Everything hurt, his mind raced as he saw Barnaby's face. How could that be? He shut out the noise from the city around him, focusing on Barnaby completely.

He was surprised that he had enough attention left to catch the name and picture of the accused murderer: Kotetsu T. Kaburagi.

"That's not...!" His eyes were so wide it almost hurt. What! He didn't do anything! He'd just gotten there...and he would never kill someone anyway! Something was wrong...He slowly started to calm as he realized that news had him wrong, and maybe Barnaby...

Fear came back again. He was going to throw up. He was going to throw up in front of all the people who were watching him, all staring at him because...because that was his face up there.

Somehow he gathered himself together enough to activate his powers and get the hell out of there. He ran and ran until his powers were out. No one could see who he was at that speed. When he stopped he was under a bridge. It was a small bridge and the dark area under it was filthy and littered with trash. It was leading to the outskirts of town. He had run quite far, even in his less-than-five-minutes. He guessed he was safe enough for the time being.

It didn't matter, because all Kotetsu needed was a place to have a complete breakdown. He punched an empty box, kicked what he could, tore up what he could, as tears poured down his face and he tried not to scream. He couldn't stay completely silent, his crying louder than he felt comfortable with. It didn't help that he made noise throwing and breaking things. 'Bunny's gone he's gone he's gone...maybe he's not gone...but what if he is, Bunny Bunny!' The panic in his head was too much to bear.

He eventually collapsed into a pile, his face buried in his arms as he kept crying. He had no idea how long he'd been there, and it didn't matter. Kotetsu knew he had to find the truth, but he couldn't function. It was impossible.

"Bunny...please be okay," he sobbed over and over. He kept crying even as his throat and eyes hurt. He passed out like that as the stress and fear finally sapped him of the last of his energy.

He couldn't be sure what time he woke up. It was nighttime, that was easily established. He was alone, and extremely cold even through his brown coat. He wished he had a blanket or his other clothes...it was then he realized he'd left his bags at Barnaby's apartment, out of habit more than anything.

A violent shiver ran through him...Bunny. Kotetsu slowly climbed to his feet. He felt numb, but he wouldn't get anything done by staying under a bridge and losing his head. If he did that, he wouldn't find out the truth at all, at least likely not in time to keep things from getting worse.

That is, if they could get worse. If Kotetsu did figure out why he was on the news, and learned Barnaby was in fact gone...

His first thought was to go join him.

Kotetsu nearly punched himself, Barnaby would never want that, never approve of it. He couldn't leave Kaede either. Such dumb thinking! But he wouldn't know how to go on...

He tried to distract himself, looking at his hands and jacket...he was filthy. He imagined he looked pretty bad too due to all the crying. Well, he'd go clean up, maybe, and then figure out what to do. Truth be told he had no idea how to start on getting to the bottom of the news story, and he wasn't sure he would be able to in his mental state.

There was a good chance his apartment was not safe. So Kotetsu made the choice to go back to Barnaby's. He was well aware that might make him even worse, but he needed some hope to cling to and being in Barnaby's apartment would make it harder to accept he was gone. Plus, he had to wash his face.

Taking a deep breath he started on his way back. And he had to move carefully. He hadn't gotten far before realizing there were wanted posters plastered up with his photo. "Why?" was all he could ask when he saw the first one. He'd never kill anyone. Everyone knew that. Didn't the other heroes try to help him? He knew they'd stand up for him for sure...

He had to hide behind anything he could fine whenever people showed up. Kotetsu even started walking with a newspaper he found open and in his face so it would look like he was reading. It worked for a little while, until he actually did start reading instead of looking where he was going. He nearly fell on his face.

The trip back to the apartment was uneventful, but nervewracking. Once he was inside he could breathe. He again poked around and found no one there watching him. He stared at Barnaby's chair, felt his chest tighten, and forced himself to go take a shower. Even that felt wrong, but what else could he do?

He very nearly lost his head again in the shower, remembering the day before with Barnaby. But even though he cried, he didn't completely lose his shit, because what the hell was that going to do? He stepped out of the shower slowly, energy dying away again. His accidental nap earlier had not been restful.

Once he dried off and changed his clothes he went to Barnaby's chair and sank into it. He turned on the television just to get bombarded by the gigantic image of his face, again. He nearly turned off the screen but he needed to calm down, watch the news story, and see what he could get from it.

According to the reporter on screen, apparently Kotetsu had beaten and killed Wild Tiger's partner and his aunt with his own hands. It was awfully convenient to hear that they couldn't find a motive. Kotetsu fled the scene and was moving on foot but was seen in the city by multiple witnesses, and was likely after Wild Tiger.

Funeral services would be held in a couple of days and citizens were already leaving flowers and stuffed animals in a 'shrine' in front of the Apollon building. Kids were crying, people were crying, and it was just too much. Kotetsu hung in there, watching the broadcast as it talked about Barnaby's life. Thankfully it didn't dwell too much and eventually the news moved onto a bank robbery. The place was on fire. Kotetsu smiled a little as Blue Rose showed up for the rescue, and then he turned off the TV. He curled into a ball as he tried to figure out his next move.

Wild Tiger was him. The higher ups knew that. Lloyds knew that. They knew Kotetsu wouldn't hurt Barnaby. He didn't see any way that anyone in that entire freaking building could see Kotetsu as anything other than head over heels for his partner. No one had called him..

Kotetsu sat up straight, and then made a dash across the room for his call bracelet. He hadn't thought of it before! "This has to give me some answers," he muttered as he tried to call Lloyds, or anyone really. He didn't get far. He was disconnected, and couldn't call anyone.

He sat back on his knees, eyes wide. Disconnected? What the hell did that even mean? He tried again, and had no luck. His phone? He dug that out. He had gotten an updated one through the company, and he had an idea...

And he was right. He tried to use it and couldn't call out. None of the heroes had tried to reach him, and he imagined Nathan would have several things to say upon seeing the news. Well, it seemed he was on his own, isolated. Lonely again. He sighed. "Must it always be like this?"

"Like what?"

Kotetsu jumped to his feet upon hearing a familiar voice, and struck a ridiculous karate-type pose. He was ready to deck just about anyone who wasn't Barnaby, in hopes that it would make them produce his Bunny.

But he wasn't ready to deck Ivan, who cowered in front of him. "What the..Ivan what the hell?"

"I kind of followed you."

Kotetsu blinked. "Uh..."

"Hey, Ivan, do you think anyone will care if I finish off this cereal or...shit!" A box of some dull looking wheat cereal hit the floor and spilled as Edward of all people stared at Kotetsu.

And Kotetsu stared right on back, having no idea why the hell he was seeing Edward. "The hell? You...you're a damned criminal, why are you in Barnaby's apartment!"

"Don't hit him Kotetsu!" Ivan immediately inserted himself between Kotetsu and Edward. "He's with me. He's not bad anymore he's...he's with me."

"Yea, okay, not bad anymore? I totally believe that, sure," Kotetsu growled, not in the mood for criminals to be hanging out in his boyfriend's apartment. Though technically, he was one. That thought dulled the anger about seeing Edward.

"After my brother died I..."

"Don't bring that creepy fucker up," Kotetsu snapped and was surprised at the words that left his mouth.

Edward glared at first, the man had been his own blood after all. Ivan moved closer to him and put a hand on Edward's arm. Edward visibly relaxed, looking troubled even as Ivan whispered something to him. Kotetsu couldn't hear it.

Then Ivan turned to him. "It's true, Mr. Tiger...he took a wrong direction and wound up with Jake and all, but...he wants to help."

"Correction, I want to help out Ivan. I could really give less of a shit about you," Edward added in.

"Edward..." Ivan sighed.

Confusing, but Kotetsu could go with it. He didn't like or trust Edward, but the same didn't go for Ivan. "Whatever. So...you guys want to help me?"

"Yes," Ivan replied.

"The other heroes?" Kotetsu asked.

"Well..." Ivan exchanged glances with Edward. "Something is wrong with them. The other night we all got invited to an event hosted by Maverick. I didn't go because I was with Edward. The next day everyone was acting strange."

It didn't take a genius to know something happened at that event. The questions were what, how and most importantly, why. "How were they acting?"

"I used your real name and no one knew it, when I asked if you had come back yet. They all seemed kind of angry. And they-"

"Was Barnaby there?" Kotetsu asked, trying to keep calm.

"No." Ivan shook his head. "No one's heard from Barnaby, last we heard, well..."

"He's apparently dead. We don't know any more than you do." Edward folded his arms.

"So no one has seen him..." Kotetsu's gaze found the floor.

"Doesn't mean he's actually dead."

Kotetsu looked up sharply at Edward. "What good would it do for someone to pretend he is?" he asked, voice thick. "How would they explain it when he isn't?"

"Maybe they tried and only think they succeeded," was Edward's answer.

It wasn't an answer Kotetsu liked much, thinking about Barnaby being hurt and needing to endure it. He just nodded.

"Everyone was acting so strangely that I had a feeling I should get out of there. I found Edward and we kind of...started looking for you. This was before the broadcast."

"Me?" Kotetsu asked, and Ivan didn't reply. What was so special about him that Ivan had purposely left the others to find him? He was flattered, sort of, but didn't get it.

There was no answer as they all stared at each other. If there were two people Kotetsu never thought he'd be working with...well damn, there they were.

"Maybe we should actually do something," Edward suggested dryly.

"Well..what should we do? Look for Barnaby?" Kotetsu asked.

"Idiot. We can't wander this city searching, you and I are both wanted," Edward pointed out. "We need to go directly to Maverick, we'll still be out there where others might see us, but it gives a direction for us to go in."

"You're right," Kotetsu agreed, though in his head it was because starting at Maverick's was the best place to begin finding the truth about Barnaby. "...Can we go now?"

"Um..." Ivan scratched his head.

Edward walked up to Ivan and laid his hand on his back, and Kotetsu swore he shot him a look that said 'MINE'. "Let's go. We'll have to be careful."

Ivan agreed. Kotetsu hurried to change into clothes he could go out in, using as much as he could to disguise himself and even Edward, and then they were off.

Unfortunately, the trio didn't get far.

They'd gotten down a few streets, and were actually pretty close to their target location when a jet of ice shot out at them in an alley. Kotetsu barely managed to dodge, jumping one way as the other two went the opposite. He landed on his side and pulled himself up to see Blue Rose pointing one of her guns at him. "I got you, murderer."

All Kotetsu was able to spit out was "That's not your catchphrase!" before more ice came his way.

He had no choice but to activate so that he could get out of the path. The other two didn't have any sort of super speed, he knew, and he worried – but she wasn't interested in them. Blue Rose didn't even seem to have an interest in Edward. She was coming after Kotetsu.

Kotetsu didn't want to fight her. He really, really did not want to hurt her. He didn't feel like being frozen anyway. "Hey, Blue Rose, you know me!"

"I know your face from the wanted posters, yes," she said, again pointing and shooting her gun. Kotetsu jumped to the top of a dumpster and perched there. He could outrun her, but...he would learn nothing.

He was contemplating what to do next, surprised that she gave him a moment to do so.

Then he felt an impending sense of doom and heard a familiar yell. Kotetsu rolled out of the way, landing hard on the ground since he rolled right off the dumpster. It was a good decision as the dumpster was suddenly smashed and Rock Bison growled at him, something about being a lowlife.

"Antonio!" Kotetsu said in surprise, and was charged at.

"How do you know my name, scum?" Antonio had Kotetsu slammed against the wall, crushing him.

Good thing he had those powers. Kotetsu shoved him off. "Hey stop it! It's me! What's going on?"

Antonio took a swing at him, and then another and another. Blue Rose came in on the fight again too launching sharp daggers of ice at him. It was too much! Kotetsu tried to focus as things came at him rapidly, what was he going to do? He barely noticed as a pool of sand appeared by Blue Rose and Edward launched out, taking her down in a hard tackle.

Kotetsu shoved Antonio off one more time before both of them just stopped what they were doing and watched Blue Rose. She certainly wasn't badly hurt, but there was the lingering feeling that simply knocking her over was a bad, bad idea.

So Kotetsu darted around Antonio, trying a rather pathetic tactic. He stopped in front of Blue Rose and held out his hand. "Hey, come on, I'll help you up."

Edward looked at him like he was crazy, while something flickered across Blue Rose's face...

And the wall to their right exploded. Kotetsu fell back himself while Edward hurried returned to his strange little quicksand-teleportation thing. Clouds of dust and debris rolled out from where the wall had exploded out and a bright pink could be seen stepping through.

"Bunny?" Kotetsu asked hopefully.

Nope, it was...well it was him. It was his suit, though in a pink and red color that didn't work at all, but Kotetsu had more to worry about than just the image. He scrambled backwards as the fake Tiger shot at him with a bright pink wire. It wrapped around his leg and started to drag him back.

"Shit shit!" Kotetsu clawed the ground which only hurt his fingers. It was then that he noticed his power had yet again just left him. He had barely noticed. He gave up clawing since it only made him leave blood, his mind panicking as he tried to figure out what to do. Antonio was approaching. Blue Rose was getting up.

Edward came up again near her but she turned almost immediately to catch him and he jumped away. Ivan...Kotetsu had no clue where Ivan even was. Why didn't he turn into someone who had some sort of say? Couldn't he assume some fake authority and stop the others?

Two things happened at once.

A blue and green fireball hit and snapped the wire, and a blur swooped in quickly. Kotetsu felt himself getting scooped up in someone's arms. He was being carried away, to where he didn't know but he was too surprised to ask or do anything.

He was dumped unceremoniously inside a dumpster that time, laying on a pile of smelly but bizarrely comfortable trash bags. He didn't see his rescuer, who bounded off immediately. He had an idea...but why would he leave? He stared into the sky, searching for stars despite the city lights, and realized that it was about dawn. The darkness cleared just barely, or were his eyes just messed up?

He would have liked to give it more thought, but Kotetsu was unable to keep from passing out right then and there.

"What is your problem? We're on the same side."

"He is a murderer."

"It was an accident! He didn't mean to do it. He was trying to help."

"Someone was still killed. My code of justice doesn't allow that."

"ACCIDENT! What's wrong with you? He didn't choose to kill someone."

"That doesn't matter."

The voices all sounded the same to Kotetsu and he wondered momentarily if they were in his head. He shuddered, slight panic in his mind that somehow he was back with Night Terror. He didn't want to be back there and he tried and tried to wake up…only to realize he was awake.

"Mr. Tiger?" Ivan questioned, looking at him.

Kotetsu realized that he'd sat up at some point after waking up. He slowly fixed his eyes on the scene in front of him – Ivan, Edward and.. "Lunatic!" he blurted before he could stop himself, and then he shivered. It was daytime, but still cold so late in the year. He remembered in the back of his mind that Christmas was coming, and he needed to plan it for Barnaby.

Barnaby…

"He's awake. I no longer need to be out here." Lunatic watched him. It was unnerving.

"But…what if that…that strange Tiger shows up again?" Ivan asked.

Lunatic didn't answer for a moment. Kotetsu got the sense he was conflicted, though he couldn't understand why. All he knew about Lunatic was that he was kind of insane with his whole justice thing. Kotetsu was supposedly a killer and- "Why aren't you after me?" he asked. "You have this whole thing about killing murderers don't you?"

"You killed no one," Lunatic remarked.

"How do you know? I mean, I didn't, but how do you know?" Kotetsu started to stand up out of the garbage. He couldn't imagine how bad he probably smelled.

"You do not kill. Watching you, you are a person who does not kill. Even when they deserve it."

"No one deserves it," Kotetsu mumbled.

"You have your ways. I simply correct them once in a while."

"Hey!"

"I have lingered too long," Lunatic decided finally. It occurred to Kotetsu that he had only ever seen him at night anyway, barring the fight with Jake. That had been special circumstances. "He will be back soon anyway."

"He?" Kotetsu asked, confused, but Lunatic took off. He watched him go and rubbed his forehead, shifting his focus to Ivan and Edward. "You two didn't tell me you were cooperating with that creep."

"We weren't," Edward supplied.

Ivan nodded. "He came to us. I guess we're wanted now for 'helping the fugitive'."

"Huh." Kotetsu frowned. Whoever had set up the situation they were in…he suspected Ivan had avoided it unintentionally, so the criminal used what he could. And it was pretty handy that Ivan was with Edward since he was still wanted. They looked like some twisted little gang, he was sure. He didn't know what to do about it.

"We need to move," Edward spoke up. "The police will get here eventually."

"Where do we go?" Kotetsu asked.

Ivan and Edward looked at each other before Edward spoke up again. "I have a place I've been hiding. But…only Ivan is allowed in…" He slowed down, as if unsure of what he was about to say and that was a first to Kotetsu. Edward seemed pretty sure of what he was up to and how he felt about Kotetsu, even if Kotetsu himself didn't understand anything that was going on.

"I just need somewhere to hide. When I know my next move, I'll leave," Kotetsu promised him. He didn't know his next move though. He felt like a total dumbass, not knowing what to do. Why would they bother to protect him? If anything he should protect them. He felt himself slipping back into his own mind at an alarming rate and at a completely inappropriate time to boot. "Uh…"

"We'll go." Edward still looked unsure. "I don't know what else to do. Let's go."

"Okay…wait." Kotetsu remembered Lunatic's words. "Is there another person with you?"

Both men shook their heads.

"Then who was Lunatic talking about?" he asked, even though he doubted they knew.

"We don't know. Although someone did help us back there, with the fake Tiger." Ivan shrugged.

"Fake Tiger…" Who had replaced him? Again, his brain asked why over and over. He wanted to find Maverick or Lloyds, someone in charge. But if Maverick though he killed Barnaby, he would not be his friend. "Ivan, you never saw-"

He was cut short as something crashed into him, knocking him over painfully and onto the cold concrete ground. He preferred the garbage, and he growled as he tried to pick himself up. Someone held him down though, and all he could do was struggle. "Hey! Hey!"

He heard cries of surprise from Edward and Ivan, and waited for them to rush to help him. They didn't. Kotetsu yelled in confusion and tried to rise up to push whatever it was off his back. He tried and tried before realizing he could use his powers. He didn't want to. He stopped moving and focused, about to activate them.

Then he was free. Kotetsu immediately got to his knees, and slowly to his feet. His opponent wasn't in front of him, and he whirled around to see…

To see Barnaby.

At least he thought it was Barnaby. The blonde man in front of him looked like he'd been to hell and back. His hair was messed up, face bruised, his hands shook, his shirt was off and his torso was covered with dirt and blood. Kotetsu's eyes went wide at the blood and he noted an ugly, deep gash that stretched diagonally across his chest. Barnaby still had on his jeans, which was the only normalcy Kotetsu could find.

Almost scarier than the gash were Barnaby's eyes. They were wide, panicked looking, red rimmed and irritated looking. Barnaby himself looked like a combination between scared and afraid.

Kotetsu would have liked to run right at him and hug him. Something told him that would be a very, very bad idea and he held himself back, letting one word slip through his lips. "Bunny?"

Barnaby blinked a couple of times. He remained looking like a frightened animal, though he spoke. "Kotet-Kotetsu?"

"Yes!"

'…Murderer."

"What…no!"

"Yes you are," Barnaby said, glaring.

"I…okay. Then explain how you're standing here if I murdered you."

The glare turned to confusion. Barnaby kept watching him. "I don't know."

In addition to Kotetsu being wanted, apparently Barnaby had lost his mind. Okay. Kotetsu could deal with that. He could. There had to be a way to deal with it. "Bunny…"

The name, he noticed, had gotten attention the first time. And he was rewarded yet again with a response, though Barnaby studied him first. "Kotetsu!" He moved toward Kotetsu finally, quickly.

Any urge Kotetsu had to defend himself against Barnaby melted away. Barnaby wasn't about to attack him. Kotetsu sighed in relief when Barnaby wrapped his arms around him and buried his face in his shoulder. Kotetsu smiled.

And then he cried. Kotetsu clung tightly to Barnaby as tears ran down his face. It was a happy cry since Barnaby was alive. He cried when he thought he was dead, and cried when he wasn't. Kotetsu wondered when he became a crybaby, but it didn't matter as he and Barnaby lowered themselves to the ground in their embrace. Both sat on their knees since it offered far more balance for them than standing. Kotetsu's hand roamed Barnaby's back, his neck, his hair; he touched everything he could to establish Barnaby was real.

When that wasn't enough he drew back to looked at him, one hand cupping his face where there were no bruises. Barnaby's eyes still looked strange. Kotetsu pressed their foreheads together.

"What happened to you?" Kotetsu managed to ask.

"Maverick," Barnaby replied and closed his eyes for a fraction of a second. He opened them and looked at Kotetsu in surprise again. "You killed Samantha." His eyes softened. "No, you didn't…why did I think you did?" He appeared to be asking himself and not Kotetsu.

"What happened to your face? And…shit, Bunny!" Kotetsu pushed him away a little more, harder than he meant to. He looked at the injury across Barnaby's chest, and the blood that had gotten on his own clothing. "You need a hospital!"

"Oh, that." Barnaby looked down, his hands on Kotetsu's waist. "It won't heal."

"…Hospital!" Kotetsu repeated.

"No. Can't. Everyone thinks I'm dead."

"So, we'll prove them wrong and I'll be innocent!" Kotetsu didn't see the problem. Was it so complicated?

"Maverick will hurt someone else," Barnaby said. He leaned forward to hide against Kotetsu's neck once more.

Kotetsu was still digesting the idea of Maverick doing something to Barnaby, since it wasn't hard to guess he had hurt him. "Maverick hurt you?"

"He killed my parents."

"What!" Kotetsu yelled, and winced as it echoed off of the buildings around them. He wished he could see Barnaby's face.

"He can plant and modify memories. So I never knew."

That was terrifying, to put it lightly. "Why?"

"For the show, he said for the show, Mom and Dad didn't agree when he set up crimes, he's a member of Ouroboros, he raised me…no he didn't raise me, he just told me he did…" Barnaby babbled, trying to sort out his thoughts. And while normally Kotetsu would have allowed him the time to do it, he was more concerned about that wound.

"Barnaby, seriously, your chest…"

"It went numb hours ago."

"It..Bunny that's not a good sign!"

"It's fine." Barnaby finally picked his head up and looked at Kotetsu. "She used venom."

"Eh?"

Barnaby sighed. "The NEXT who did this, she poisoned it not to heal. But it's also not getting worse."

A torture wound, Kotetsu figured. It was likely for short term torture, since the pain seemed to have worn off. While he couldn't be sure what Barnaby meant about it 'not getting worse', he was still panicked at the idea of infection. "I…"

"Please kiss me."

Kotetsu wondered if he should have kept on about the injury, but he didn't think about it really. He was eager to kiss Barnaby and when their lips met he pressed deeper. Maybe if he kissed him deeply enough Barnaby would always be safe. Kotetsu didn't want to stop. He wanted his bed and Barnaby beside him, under him, any position just to be together.

He only stopped kissing when he heard someone clear their throat. He looked up sheepishly at Edward. "You two can do that when we're out of here. We still need to hide or have you forgotten that?" He seemed irritated. Ivan stood behind him, cheeks beet red.

Barnaby shivered. Kotetsu felt the cold seeping back; he had sort of forgotten about it. Barnaby was shirtless and injured. They had to get him somewhere. "Bunny? We're going to a safe place."

"Okay…"

"Are you okay to travel?" He could guess Barnaby had been out and about for a while at that point, but the question was still valid.

"Yes, as long as you stay with me."

"Always, Bunny." Kotetsu stood and lowered a hand to help Barnaby. He took it and pulled himself up, hands clinging to Kotetsu's arm immediately.

"I love you. Maverick tried to make me forget that. He tried to take you away." Barnaby whispered.

That was scary. Kotetsu swallowed. He depended on Barnaby, likely more than he should, but he couldn't help it. "I love you too. Fuck him for trying to take that away from us." He meant that, and the sentence came out with such hatred that he surprised himself. His head supplied that Barnaby was his. Maverick couldn't take him away. He nearly voiced that.

Edward spoke before he could. "Okay. Let's get moving."

Barnaby shivered again and Kotetsu knew it was best to get moving.

As much as Kotetsu hated to admit it, there were some pros to Edward having teamed up with Kriem, Eric and Jake so long ago. They had resources, even from jail. Jake had not been jailed a poor man, even if his money was not acquired legally. Kriem had been on the outside with plenty of advantages, and well, she needed somewhere to live.

And that's how they wound up in a small house in one of the less populated areas of Stern Bild. That didn't mean there weren't many people. They still had to be very careful and time themselves right to get into the place. They were nearly caught a couple of times, though Kotetsu couldn't mark exactly when and how. He just had that feeling.

Relief washed over him when they were in the house, door closed, windows covered by blinds, hidden away. It was a two bedroom house, managing to be two stories with one bedroom and bathroom on the second floor and living room, kitchen, second bathroom and second bedroom on the first. It was also crammed with a bunch of creepy teddy bears, and Kotetsu sort of remembered the one holding the camera when he was in the stadium. The image flashed to his mind and he felt his spine tingle, crawl.

He really hated that memory, even if good came from it all in the end.

He couldn't think about that as he forced Barnaby to drink some water and led him to the downstairs bathroom. They all had to discuss what to do next, but as quickly as they had gotten there, Edward had practically stormed upstairs and Ivan fell asleep snoring on a black and red extra-gothy looking couch. He got it. It was time to rest, get back their energy, and lick some wounds.

Or at least, treat Barnaby's. The blonde hissed in pain when Kotetsu tried to treat his chest. "Stop it!" he whined. "There's no use! Unless you know what poison she used and how to treat that, there's no point!" He sat on the edge of the bathtub, which was, of course, black.

"We still need to keep it clean and covered! What's your problem? You're smarter than this!" Kotetsu growled back.

"It won't do any good!" he protested again, though not as strongly. Barnaby sighed and fixed his eyes on Kotetsu. "Are you going to clean it?"

"Uh-huh. And your face, and your hair, I don't suppose I can get you into a shallow bath?"

Barnaby looked offended. "Ugh, around you!"

Kotetsu stared.

Barnaby shook his head. "Shit…dunno what that was. I forgot we were together for a second."

"Oh." Kotetsu tried not to be hurt by it. He reached for one of the zillion red washcloths and dampened it with warm soapy water. He held Barnaby's face in one hand, avoiding the injured area like before. He gently brought the washcloth against the bruises and Barnaby flinched, but nothing more. He actually began to relax as Kotetsu carefully cleaned his face, removing dirt, sweat, bits of blood he hadn't noticed before, and probably the salt of tears. He washed behind his ears briefly before tossing the washcloth into the sink. "There," he said, smiling at Barnaby's pretty face.

"That feels better…thank you."

"Of course…but your hair is still gross. About the bathtub…it would help me wash your hair," he told him. If it weren't for the wound he'd have suggested a shower.

Barnaby nodded, no signs of the earlier brief protest. Kotetsu wondered how fucked his memory was.

After a few minutes they were both settled in the tub, Barnaby sitting with his chest to Kotetsu's back, or he would be if Kotetsu hadn't left a small space to allow him to wash his Bunny easier. "How bad is it?" Kotetsu finally asked as he carefully worked shampoo into Barnaby's hair.

There was no need for Barnaby to ask what he meant. "I can't remember a lot. I remember a lot about you and I, though sometimes my mind seems to hit a blank spot. I can't remember our first kiss, though I know we had one, but I can remember the first time you said you loved me."

His stomach clenched at the thought of Barnaby losing such important memories. "Well…that's okay, I guess," he managed to say. It wasn't. He wanted Barnaby to remember everything, from the first time they argued to when they first had sex.

"He tried to pull everything away." Barnaby moved his fingers under the water. "After he told me the truth about the day my parents died…I know I must have found out before. Several times. And each time he took it away while calling it a 'gift'."

"And…he's a NEXT with memory powers…" Kotetsu murmured. "How come he could make you forget who killed your parents, but not me? I'm not complaining, though."

Barnaby shrugged. "My guess is that you're presence in my life is too strong to eradicate. I don't know how deep his powers go, not the technicalities. All I know is that it hurt so badly as he tried to pull you away. I screamed a lot and made him angrier."

Kotetsu kissed the back of Barnaby's neck, hating the thought of Barnaby screaming in pain. "I see…"

"I still don't know what he wanted to do once he took away those memories. Because even if he took them away, you would still exist in the real world, as do the other Heroes and people who know us."

"Well, right now he's got me up there as a murderer who killed you and Samantha. And even with everyone who knows us, he's getting away with it. He messed with them." It was as simple as that. But how?

Barnaby fell silent for a little while, before piping up with "He drugged me."

Kotetsu froze. He had been rinsing Barnaby's hair. "Dr-dru…"

"I couldn't use my powers that way. I could barely function. The only reason I stayed awake was because of the pain." He trembled and Kotetsu hugged him to his chest. "When he gave up and I blacked out…I woke up with a gun to my head."

Kotetsu swallowed and buried his face in Barnaby's still wet hair. He had a lot of thoughts going in his head, including the conclusion that Maverick had likely drugged and brainwashed anyone that could help them. How he managed to do that…Kotetsu actually didn't care.

He was far more concerned about what happened to Barnaby. "And then?" he asked, his voice thick.

"As I was no longer of use to Maverick, he wanted to get rid of me for good. He wasn't there when I woke up in a dark room..garage maybe… but his Ouroboros goons were. That's when I got hurt…" The gash, Kotetsu knew. "I had trouble using my powers. They kind of beat me up…" He trailed off. He sounded embarrassed.

"And?" Kotetsu prompted anyway, not about to let Barnaby shut down on him. He kept his arms around him, bodies pressed close together.

"After they'd had their fun one was left to kill me. And…he talked to me instead. He said a couple of months ago I saved his little boy during a hostage situation, something unrelated to Ouroboros. And for that, he didn't want to kill me, at least right there. So he shot the ceiling twice for appearances, and when he left I heard him telling someone he'd finished up, but not to go in until Maverick was back. I don't remember how long I was lying on that floor. As soon as I felt my powers return, I was outta there. I don't know if anyone there saw me…seemed empty."

Kotetsu didn't know what to say. He said a silent prayer in his head, thanking that man for having enough humanity to let Barnaby live.

"And…now I'm here. And I know as little about what's happening now as you do. But we have to go after Maverick…we have to." His voice came out a desperate plea.

"Not right now," Kotetsu whispered in his ear and leaned forward more to kiss his cheek. "I wonder…what he was planning that he decided you were useless because he couldn't make you forget me?" Seemed to him that with a power like that, Maverick could do plenty of other nasty things

"I don't know. I think he decided that his efforts were best used just to get rid of me…" Barnaby sniffed and Kotetsu was surprised to see tears roll down his cheek. "That's all I ever was, Kotetsu."

"Eh?"

"I've been this thing he steered into being a hero for his own uses. Maverick never loved me. I meant nothing to him, and he made sure I didn't mean anything to anyone else. I can't remember having any friends for very long." He put his face in his hands.

"Bunny…" Kotetsu didn't know what to say. He had no idea what memories were real for Barnaby, or what had been taken away.

"I don't know who I am, what I used to like, who I used to like…I don't even know why I stay away from others. I was so lonely before we met," he said softly, still crying without outright sobbing. "What do I do?"

For once, Kotetsu had an idea. He took Barnaby's hands, drawing them away from his face and squeezing them. "We'll find your old memories…and in the meantime, make new ones."

"But it's not that simple…"

"Why? Why does it have to be complicated?"

"What if we find out I was someone else? Not someone you'd like? What if I did something horrible?"

"We'll get through it." Kotetsu truly believed that. He couldn't see anything Barnaby would have done or said in his past to make Kotetsu stop loving him then. Barnaby didn't strike him as the kind of person who would do any such things, even under Maverick's 'control'. He conditioned him to be a hero from the sounds of it, and at worst had probably isolated Barnaby in a dull life.

Not that such a thing wasn't horrible. Barnaby had year upon years stolen from him because of someone he trusted. The only person he trusted, in fact, aside from Kotetsu. Barnaby continued to cry and Kotetsu held him, kissing him and trying to provide what physical comfort he could.

He didn't know what he could do mentally. Barnaby needed more than he could give since it had to be something that needed approach on proffessional level. He'd probably get his own therapist.

"Bunny, we are both so messed up."

"A-are we?" Barnaby stuttered, and took a deep breath.

"You don't know who you are, and I hate the me I know."

Barnaby turned to look at him, eyes puzzled. "No, Kotetsu, don't…."

"Maybe hate was too strong a word. Point is, we both need help. But we can't let that keep us from being happy, or trying to."

"Easy for you to say," Barnaby snorted.

Kotetsu kissed his nose. "Harder than you think, actually." Being happy was still a struggle. Barnaby's problems were far worse in comparison but…that didn't make it any easier.

After the bath Kotetsu was able to apply some ointment to Barnaby's injury. He bandaged it overly securely with the bandage fabric circling around his back twice before Kotetsu decided it was snug and safe. Only then did he let Barnaby get dressed again.

He also noticed Barnaby having trouble staying awake the whole time he took care of him, so off to the bed they went. Kotetsu didn't feel tired. He had to rest his body, but he didn't feel it. He was too worried to be tired.

They sank into the purple…and black…bed in the downstairs bedroom. It looked like it'd never been used which was good. Otherwise it would have given Kotetsu the creeps. The room was windowless and dark. It was perfect for their needs.

Barnaby had snuggled right up to Kotetsu with a happy sigh, his eyes flickering to his face. "Kotetsu, you should sleep."

"You're one to talk."

"I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open to look at you. I want to look at you…but I can tell you're not even going to try closing yours." Barnaby wrapped an arm around Kotetsu's chest and kissed along his collarbone.

"Bunny, what are you doing?" If there was ever a time not to fool around with each other…well that was it. And when Barnaby started kissing and nibbling his collarbone like that, he knew damn well where it was headed.

"Relaxing you." Barnaby kissed his chest, and moved his arm even though he'd just put it around Kotetsu. His hand lowered under the blankets, under the waistband of the ugly pants Kotetsu found to wear.

Kotetsu's breath hitched and he found himself unable to tell Barnaby to stop. Even after such a short period of time his body still craved his lover's touch, his talented hands. "Bunny…" he had intended a last bit of protest but it came out more like a moan.

Barnaby kissed him, soft but needy against his lips and in his mouth. The last traces of Kotetsu's thoughts about not fooling around in the bed slipped away. There were worse ways to fall asleep -not that a handjob was bad to begin with.


	10. I'll stay with you for all of time

Kotetsu was woken up by a yell. It was coming from beside him.

He opened his eyes to see a truly freaked out Barnaby looking back at him. "Get the hell out of my bed!" he said, sounding scared.

It took a moment for Kotetsu to register that Barnaby was having trouble remembering them again. He sighed. "Hey-"

"I mean it, get away from me!" He shoved Kotetsu hard and it was a miracle Kotetsu didn't fall out of the bed.

"BUNNY!" The magic word. Kotetsu was aggravated though, even if he shouldn't be. It wasn't Barnaby's fault, after all. Still, he couldn't deny that his heart hurt each time Barnaby didn't recognize him.

Barnaby stared at him before his eyes fixated on Kotetsu's and he visibly relaxed. "Oh…I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Kotetsu told him tiredly. It wasn't really, but what could he say? He followed that with a yawn. Waking up so abruptly hadn't kept him alert for very long. He was still sleepy.

"…Sorry."

"I said-"

"I know what you said." Barnaby sat up fully, letting out a light groan as he stretched his arms out. "If I had calmed down and waited for you to come with me, Maverick wouldn't have been able to do this to me."

"I wouldn't say that, Bunny. We didn't expect this. There's no guarantee we would have been okay," he said softly. "Nothing about this is your fault." Kotetsu sat up beside him and rubbed his back with one hand. He would not be going back to bed. Barnaby was more important.

"You're too good to me, Kotetsu."

"I think it's the other way around, really," Kotetsu insisted and brought Barnaby closer to lean his head on his shoulder. He wondered if either of them were really prepared to go out looking for Maverick after their rest. He did feel refreshed, but Barnaby was in a delicate place. He rested his head against Barnaby's. He still had no idea what to do.

He said as much when they all managed to gather in the kitchen, all four of them standing quietly and watching each other. Kotetsu had no suggestions. Ivan said he didn't either, Edward just shook his head.

Then he looked at Barnaby. "You should know the best way to get to him," Edward said.

"Me? Ah…" Barnaby nodded faintly and squeezed Kotetsu's hand for support. Kotetsu squeezed back. "I barely remember getting away…when I escaped Lunatic followed me and he…helped me."

That explained why Lunatic had mentioned that 'he'. He'd been on Barnaby's tail, watching and likely protecting him. From what Kotetsu gathered, Lunatic and Barnaby sort of loathed each other. Why would Lunatic help him? Then again, Lunatic really only went after criminals.

"We can't exactly call Lunatic," Kotetsu mumbled. "He might show up, but don't make any plans for him." The others nodded.

"Again, I say that Barnaby must know," Edward pressed. "You've known Maverick for years haven't you? Were you raised by him or not? Regardless you know more about him than any of us."

"But do I? I can't be sure of anything I remember, except Kotetsu." Barnaby looked like he was in pain as he tried to think. "It's no use."

"Maybe we should just barge in there." Kotetsu saw that as the most direct way.

"Kotetsu, no," Barnaby said softly.

Edward narrowed his eyes. "Idiot! We can't do that!"

"Why?" Kotetsu asked.

"Don't you think he'll be prepared for an attack? From you, and Barnaby-"

"He doesn't know I'm alive," Barnaby informed Edward rather miserably.

"…Okay. Well he'll expect Tiger. And he might call the other heroes." Edward leaned against the kitchen counter.

"We need to get to them first."

All eyes turned on Ivan as he spoke quietly. "It'll draw attention because it will be impossible to be sneaky. But we need them on our side," Ivan explained.

Kotetsu couldn't find it in him to disagree. "Okay…but how?" he asked. "They won't listen to me, we know that, not Edward and likely not you…"

"I know." Ivan pointed at Barnaby. "But they don't know about him."

"Oh yea…" Kotetsu looked at Barnaby who seemed extremely nervous.

"I don't know, I mean, what if they don't believe it's me, and just some look alike…Ivan can shift forms can't he? They might just think I'm him." Barnaby let go of Kotetsu's hand but stayed where he was.

"Idiot." Edward pointed at Ivan. "They can't think he's you if he's standing there with you. By the way, I'm not going. I can't risk being in front of the heroes since I really am wanted."

Kotetsu nodded while Ivan looked at Edward as if he'd just slapped him. "You're not coming?" he asked.

"No." Edward's tone was gentler with Ivan. "I'm sorry…I can't. But I'll do what I can on the outside and come back here to wait for you."

Ivan nodded. "Okay.."

"So we just need to get…somewhere to attract the heroes," Kotetsu remarked, trying to speed up the process.

"Yes." Barnaby abruptly pushed away from the counter to walk to the bedroom. "If you'll excuse me, I need to go get dressed so I can be used for bait."

"Bunny…" Kotetsu watched him sadly.

"Why not? I've been bait, I've been a pawn, it's all my life has meant," he grumbled. "Leave me alone," he snapped before Kotetsu could tell him anything else.

A second later, the bedroom door slammed and Kotetsu winced.

Kotetsu was not a fan of their disguises.

He was tucked into a hoodie that depicted a skull and some ace of spades cards on the front. It fit him well, and he wondered why Kriem had something in her closet that would be so big for her. Perhaps she was saving it for Jake. It didn't really matter, he'd found it, was tucked in with his mask, and unfortunately, his beards had grown out of shape due to not being able to shave for a couple of days. It helped him in that he couldn't be identified, at least. He just kept his head down.

Barnaby nearly got the worst of it by far. Ideas were tossed around but once Ivan produced the lipstick and a skirt, Barnaby dove behind Kotetsu and stayed there with his face hidden in his back. Any questions Kotetsu might have had in regards to Barnaby wanting to crossdress were quickly gone.

In the end Barnaby let them straighten his hair and pull it back in a ponytail. They dressed him in the gothiest crap they could find. Since he didn't have his glasses, that helped disguise him a lot. Barnaby was troubled about walking without them. When he escaped before he had his powers. They helped his vision a lot. And then he was joined at the hip to Kotetsu.

At the same time, he rejected walking down the street holding Kotetsu's hand because it made him feel like a little kid. Kotetsu could understand that. He wasn't sure how else to help Barnaby except to keep close. Barnaby did have some vision, limited as it was.

The other two dressed similarly, although Kotetsu found himself wondering why the hell Ivan did. He ended up turning into some tall, ungodly hot blonde woman anyway. He wore a blue tank top that pushed the boobs up and tight jeans that had a rip on the inner though. How he remained warm in a tank top in December was a good question. Ivan did have on long sleeves before he changed. Kotetsu wasn't entirely sure what happened with the clothes Ivan already wore, but how else could that kid be warm?

Kotetsu noticed he had lipstick on too and decided maybe Ivan had meant the skirt for himself but he sure as hell wasn't going to ask.

They had to look dumb going down the street. They just had to. Kotetsu saw goth and 'emo' kids all the time, so it wasn't that they were unusual. They just didn't really know shit about dressing that way. Kotetsu attracted a few raised eyebrows from some teens, but luckily that was the most he got. Ivan attracted a lot more looks, and whistles.

As for where they were headed?

They were going for the training center. At one time or another, all the heroes would be gathered there doing their workouts and chatting. It was the perfect time to get to the bottom of things.

Kotetsu looked at the wanted posters with a pain growing in his chest. His mind had certainly been elsewhere since he reached the city, but he was afraid of what Kaede was seeing. The news of the murder would be everywhere; Oriental Town was no exception. Kaede had to know he wasn't a murderer. She didn't even know he was a hero. All she knew was her dad was a normal guy with no extraordinary powers and no evil in him.

His mother and brother had to know he was innocent. Kotetsu knew they wouldn't buy it. But Kaede...he'd lied to her often enough, pissed her off enough that maybe, just maybe she might think the worst of her dad.

Not far into their journey Edward split off. He had come farther than he had originally agreed to, having intended on staying at the house. But he still was unwilling to go farther. He promised he'd be more help on the outside.

The closer they got to the training center, the more worried Kotetsu got. "If Maverick messed with their heads…will showing them Bunny really help?"

"The fake memory he gave me was quickly broken with the help of the photo Samantha sent, where I stood next to her that Christmas Eve instead of Maverick." Barnaby fell silent, no doubt having a hard time mentioning Samantha's name. "…This should do the damage we need."

"I sure hope you're right." It gave him some hope. Kotetsu clung to that. He needed some hope to keep going forward.

They arrived outside the training center without incident. Getting in? That would be a whole other story. Kotetsu hadn't forgotten about the security guards inside, but he had pushed them to the back of his mind in an effort to ignore the problem.

Ivan, luckily, had not ignored it. And even though he did not seem happy about what he needed to do…he was going to do it.

"Are you sure about this?" Kotetsu was asking as they approached the doors. They were unguarded on the outside, but inside he knew there would likely even be extra security.

"No. But I need to help you two. Just keep your heads down," he told them.

Kotetsu highly doubted they could keep from looking suspicious in their current ridiculous clothing, but he had to trust Ivan.

They entered the doors, and the familiar fluorescent lighting had both a comforting and nerve-wracking effect on Kotetsu. There was extra security too, and the screens near the ceiling showed nothing but his face featured in the creepiest picture he'd ever seen of himself. 'Do I really look that way?' he silently asked himself before his attention was diverted to a guard approaching them.

"Excuse me! Only staff and heroes are allowed past this point. May I ask what you're doing here?" The guard was a pretty short guy, thin, with no facial hair at all, freakishly smooth Even Barnaby had the tiniest of hairs. His nametag read'Mickey'.

"Oh, I'm here to see Rock Bison," Ivan-the-woman said in a low, really sexy voice.

"And what makes you think you can just come in here?" Mickey asked, staring at Ivan's chest. "And what about your two friends?"

"Ant…Rock Bison is my boyfriend, and I've come to give my gorgeous hunk a few kisses before he goes out risking his life. These two are my…cousins. They're too dumb to leave at home but Bison will get a kick out of them," Ivan said, resting a hand on his chest.

The guard laughed and Kotetsu made a mental note to get Ivan back later, even if it was just an act. "Rock Bison has a girl…Still ma'am, I can't just let you in here. You understand, right?"

"Oh darling, I don't think you understand!" The hand on his…boob…traced slowly, delicately down the chest, stomach, stopping once it was near the ripped part of the jeans.

The guard and Kotetsu both looked down. The guard swallowed while Kotetsu tried very hard to think of things like gross food and mysterious bathroom puddles, anything that could keep him from getting the slightest bit turned on by Ivan.

Ivan continued on. "My dear Bison could die anytime! He's out there and oh..oh!" And then the biggest show of crocodile tears Kotetsu had ever seen. Ivan even found a way to lean forward and get his cleavage out there.

Kotetsu stared until his foot was stepped on hard. He managed not to yelp and glared to his side at Barnaby, who was glaring right back. Kotetsu sighed and mouthed 'sorry', while Ivan brushed some mystery lint off of Mickey's shoulder, still crying.

"Lady, I might be able to justify you going in, but these two…" Mickey gestured to Kotetsu and Barnaby.

"I can't leave them on their own! They need to be with me! If they try to get anywhere on their own…" Ivan sobbed some more.

Kotetsu looked for the nearest breakable thing he could find and spotted a vase with some green foliage plant in it. He took two steps, forced himself to trip like a dumbass and fell an obscenely long distance to crash into and break the vase. His hood nearly came off in the process but he yanked it down as he fell.

It hurt. Before he could register that though, he heard "Oh you poor thing!" Someone tugged his arm and he looked up to see babe-Ivan and her cleavage while she bent over in front of Mickey. "See!" she said over her shoulder.

Mickey nodded. "Sure…bring them in…just make sure they don't break anything else…elevator will take you to the gym," he said. Kotetsu wasn't actually sure if his eyes were on the ass in front of him or the whole pathetic scene.

Other guards had stopped to watch as well while Ivan guided Kotetsu back. And yet, no one moved to stop them from being allowed inside the building. Kotetsu suspected it was a good combination of Ivan being hot and the whole lot of them just looking like a bunch of harmless losers who couldn't even keep their balance.

He felt he should have been upset about it, since that's what he was used to. Instead he was just relieved to be making progress, though his anxiety shot through the roof the moment they stepped into the elevator.

"I don't feel so good," Barnaby said as the elevator began to go up.

"Elevators always make me feel a little weird too," Ivan said in his normal voice. It was creepy.

Kotetsu overlooked that to direct his gaze at Barnaby. And Barnaby…he was pretty pale. His hand was resting on his chest, over his injury specifically Kotetsu was sure. "Bunny?" he asked, worried.

Barnaby looked at him. "Dizzy…kind of dizzy."

As if to establish the fact, the elevator stopped and Barnaby fell sideways, hard. He hit the wall with a grunt and Kotetsu reached for him. "Bunny!"

"I'll be okay…" Barnaby clung to him as they exited into the hallways that would lead to the gym. "I'll be okay," he repeated and Kotetsu noticed his speaking was slurred.

He couldn't go in. He could not go in if Barnaby was sick. His heart froze in his chest as he wondered about the poison in that gash. Lethal? Could be. They used it to torture, but since ultimately Barnaby was to die, it hadn't mattered if it was lethal or not...

Questions raced through Kotetsu's head as he held Barnaby close to him, forgetting for a minute where they were. He was getting scared again as Barnaby leaned into him. Going into that training center meant dragging in an ill Barnaby, and what if something went wrong and Barnaby got worse? Kotetsu kissed his head, his cheeks, almost frantically.

"Kotetsu, we have to go in," Barnaby said quietly, ducking away from the kisses.

'But-"

"I can walk in a door," Barnaby snapped, even if it didn't come out cool and crisp.

Kotetsu sighed and looked at Ivan…who wasn't there. Kotetsu blinked. That wasn't part of the plan! Where had he gone? It would be dumb to search, Ivan could look like anything or anyone. Kotetsu again looked at the door.

Well, better just go for it. He took Barnaby's hand, and a few shaky steps forward before picking up the pace. Then he steeled himself and just waltzed right on into the room, looking as if he absolutely belonged there (which he did).

All the heroes stared right at them.

It was as though all their minds were processing the situation before them. Kotetsu looked from face to face, Nathan's surprised look, Karina's hardened one, and a downright angry expression on Antonio. Keith and Pao-Lin held rather blank expressions, and Kotetsu knew in Pao-Lin's case she was likely already planning how best to take them out.

Kotetsu couldn't think at first. He had to say something. He opened his mouth and-

"I'm still alive."

Barnaby's soft voice caught everyone, and all heads turned to him. He'd taken out his hairband and let his hair fall naturally, already going curly. He still clung to Kotetsu's hand.

"But but…you're the…murderer?" Karina's voice softened as she pointed at Kotetsu.

"Clearly, I'm not." Kotetsu gestured at Barnaby.

This caused a lot of confusion, he could tell as all the heroes looked at each other.

"He was framed." The words fell from Barnaby's mouth awkwardly.

Kotetsu hadn't known what to expect. And he couldn't handle the reaction he was getting just because it wasn't resolving things quick enough. "Hey, guys…Antonio, Nathan, it's me-"

Antonio started at him then. Keith and Nathan acted fast to catch him around the waist and hold him back even while he yelled. "It has to be a trick! When we found you in the alley, Barnaby was nowhere nearby!"

"Hey!" Kotetsu stepped back. Of all the people to violently disbelieve him, his old best friend? "Come on! You can see Barnaby right here!"

"And Samantha?" Nathan asked, grunting as he held back Antonio.

"Ah…' Kotetsu looked at Barnaby who looked down. "We don't know. I sure as hell didn't kill her, I'm not like that – you guys know this!" he said desperately, their faces still full of doubt.

"Well, we can't arrest him," Karina said and Antonio stopped struggling to look at her. "If Barnaby is here, obviously he didn't kill him. Would he have come to us if he did do it?"

"Plenty of criminals have in a last ditch effort to get pity," Antonio replied.

"Maybe, but looking at this person…" she stepped forward and studied Kotetsu's face. "He doesn't seem like a murderer. He seems like someone I used to know…"

Kotetsu could hug her at that moment, if he didn't think it would provoke everyone somehow. He and Karina had never been close, never spent much time together, hell they didn't always get along – but he respected her and treated her just as he treated the other heroes. Which in theory should have meant the others recognized him too and yet she was the only one. He resolved to talk to Karina and maybe buy her a cake after everything was over and everyone was safe.

"He seems like someone I have met! And met again!" Keith declared, his face confused but it did look like he was trying to smile.

"You do know him. Every one of you knows him, why can't you remember?" Barnaby asked, more of a cry than quiet controlled speech and it surprised them all. "What did he do to you?"

"He?" asked Antonio, as Nathan carefully released him and backed away.

"Maverick," Kotetsu supplied. That was all he could get in before Barnaby went on again.

"He took Kotetsu away from every one of you; he couldn't take him from me. This is Wild Tiger!" Antonio looked like he'd been slapped and started to talk but Barnaby kept on. "You've all fought by Kotetsu's side at one point or another! Nathan, Antonio, I know you two did what you could to keep him going, how can you not remember how much you cared about him?"

Kotetsu turned red as his own private problem was brought up in front of everyone. "Bunny…" He started to steer him away from that.

However, he was unable to get another word out when Nathan suddenly exclaimed, "Bunny! …That's what Wild Tiger calls you…" He frowned.

"But Wild Tiger hasn't once mentioned 'Bunny'. He should have several times by now because…" Karina was trying to work it out.

"Because Tiger was obviously in love with Barnaby," Pao-Lin piped up, drawing some attention since she had been so quiet.

"Was?" Kotetsu laughed a little. "Is," he corrected her and squeezed Barnaby's hand. Barnaby swayed slightly in place which took away some of Kotetsu's happiness.

"Ah. I do remember that," Nathan commented. He stared at Kotetsu. "Barnaby was supposed to take good care of you. I told him that…that night when Wild Ti…no, you, it was you…I remember running my fingers through your hair."

Embarrassing, but it helped. "Yes, and then Bunny…" Kotetsu trailed off as Barnaby turned to him and tugged on his hand. "What is it?" There was fear in Barnaby's eyes. And he was still swaying.

"Kiss me. Just…kiss me please." He wasn't doing well, his condition going downhill at an alarming pace. He reached for Kotetsu who embraced him. Let them rush him and arrest him when he was distracted; he wanted to kiss Barnaby so badly. Their lips met and Barnaby clung to him desperately, clutching the terrible hoodie in his fists. "I don't remember that," someone said flatly and Kotetsu thought it might be Antonio.

The kiss slowed, and stopped, and Barnaby's breathing was labored. "Kote..Kotetsu, don't let them arrest you, please don't."

"Huh? Bunny?" Kotetsu held him, a cloud of despair settling over him.

"Don't let them…" Barnaby's words trailed off as his head fell forward and he passed out in Kotetsu's arms, just like that.

"Bunny!" Kotetsu yelled, holding the unconscious man up still. He should lay him down, he knew that, but he was terrified. "Bunny Bunny!" Tears welled up in his eyes.

"Is he-" Nathan started to ask, but stopped, as if he was afraid of intruding. Nathan was never afraid to intrude, but Kotetsu didn't have time to worry about that.

Taking a deep breath and focusing, he did the first necessary thing to do when someone passes out – he checked Barnaby's pulse. First with his wrist, and then gently pressing a thumb to that area on his neck. His heart was beating, and Kotetsu noticed he was breathing, even if faintly.

"He's alive." He didn't face the other heroes. Kotetsu still needed to calm down a little, and he couldn't take his eyes off of his partner. Regardless of Barnaby being alive, Kotetsu was trying hard not to lose it. "He's alive," he repeated, studying the serene look on Barnaby's face. He liked to think he looked that way because of their kiss.

Nathan approached, and Kotetsu flinched. He didn't know which one he was afraid of – being arrested or having someone take Barnaby out of his arms. When Nathan placed a hand on Barnaby's back, Kotetsu felt that it was the latter.

But then he put a hand on Kotetsu's back too, looking him in the eye. "Honey, it's okay. It's going to be okay."

"Please tell me you..."

"Remember?" Nathan smiled. "How on earth can I watch you and Handsome kiss and not remember who you are?"

Kotetsu rolled his eyes. "Of course..."

The others hung back, their memories not triggered by the two men kissing, it seemed. Kotetsu found he was relieved. If that had been the case he would have been a little worried about what was on everyone's minds.

The important thing was that no one went after him and they were able to get Barnaby down on a rubber mat. His body was so limp. Kotetsu hated it.

He collapsed next to Barnaby. "I don't know what to do," he said as he stroked Barnaby's hair. "Everyone thinks I'm a criminal, most of you are still trying to remember me, and Bunny is...well..."

"No idea why he's like this?" Karina asked.

Kotetsu thought of the gash and the poison, and with a sigh explained what had happened to Barnaby. He started with what Barnaby had told him about the NEXTs sent to hurt him by Maverick, ending with trying to clean that wound at their little safehouse. All through the story he wished Barnaby would wake up. But he didn't, and Kotetsu tried to close out the fact that he'd been unable to protect him.

He finished his story and stared down at the rubber mat. He didn't know what to do.

"Did you say you found Ivan?" Keith asked after a moment of silence.

"And Edward." Someone gasped and Kotetsu shook his head. "He's fine. Seriously. Compared to Maverick, Edward is a little ball on sunshine. A smartass one, but still."

"Where's Ivan?" Keith, again.

"Dunno. He came up here with us, and just before Bunny and I came in here he completely vanished. I have no idea what he's doing, it just better be smart." Kotetsu looked at Barnaby's face, and was surprised to see a little bit of blood trickling from his nose. That wasn't good. "Woah! Uh..." He looked at them all and pointed at Barnaby, his mouth refusing to work.

Everyone got moving at once. Pao-Lin was off for a washcloth she said, Keith was getting away from the blood, Karina moved down beside Kotetsu and Nathan and Antonio started discussing what to do. Kotetsu watched them all, they were like blurs before his eyes until Pao-Lin returned and handed him a damp washcloth.

Kotetsu nodded his thanks to her and dabbed at Barnaby's nose. He pinched the bridge in hopes that it would help. He hoped he wasn't making it worse.

"I still don't remember you," Karina said abruptly and he nearly turned his head.

"Nothing?" he asked.

"Not nothing...I remember images and sounds, and you're very familiar. But I still don't know who you are exactly."

"But I've said it."

"I know that! It doesn't do any good if I still can't piece everything together."

Kotetsu didn't reply to that. He watched relieved as less blood flowed from Barnaby's nose.

"I remember Barnaby though, and when I picture you with him it makes sense."

"You can remember us together, but apart only Bunny?"

"Yes..." she trailed off and said nothing more.

The familiar clang of their call bracelets went off and Kotetsu looked up. His was not working of course, and he tried to ignore that. Nathan answered his call band. "Yes, Agnes?"

"Fire Emblem, are you all together?"

"Oh yes, we are quite…together," he said, likely in an attempt to mess with Agnes. It worked because she paused awkwardly before speaking again.

"Kotetsu Kaburagi has been spotted downtown. I need you all there. Wild Tiger is on his way. Catching this criminal will earn a lot of points..."

No one was listening to what she said about the points. Instead, they were looking at Kotetsu, who stared right back. He started to feel creeped out. "Well, I'm right here! Sure as hell isn't me out there!" he hissed. He couldn't afford Agnes hearing him.

Antonio growled. "Then who-...oh." He blinked and looked utterly confused instead of pissed off. "Ivan."

Kotetsu's breath caught. So that's where the kid ran off to! He'd made himself a decoy.

"Excuse me! Is anyone listening!" Agnes's voice came clear over the callband and Antonio flinched.

"Yes woman! Loud and clear! Fine, we'll get there." Then, Nathan hung up on her. Kotetsu knew she would be in a baaad mood later.

Kotetsu watched, and then a smile tugged at his lips. "You guys aren't going downtown, are you?"

Nathan shook his head. "Can't let Ivan be a decoy if we're just going to follow him."

"We can head out, and then find Maverick," Antonio said. He looked very sullen in that moment and Kotetsu was sure he'd just remembered him and felt like a gigantic ass. He'd forgive Antonio later after making him buy him a fancy dinner.

"They'll see you going in the wrong direction," Kotetsu said.

Nathn shrugged. "So? We still act like we're going after you before we veer off."

"Ah..." Kotetsu looked down at Barnaby.

"You're staying here," Karina ordered.

Kotetsu laughed, unable to stop himself. "Did you just give me an order?"

"I sure did," she said, her eyes cold and firm. Kotetsu stopped laughing. "Someone needs to stay with Barnaby. You can't be seen out there. How hard is this to figure out?"

"Hey, for your info-"

"Good." Karina cut him off and finally stood to join the others while Kotetsu just stared. "We'll go get ready." She tossed him her callband. "I don't like not having that, but you'll need some way to stay in contact."

"I ah..."

"We'll help! And again, help!" Keith said cheerfully as Pao-Lin offered him a little wave. Karina stalked off without another word.

Antonio and Nathan hung back. "We'll take care of this. We have the advantage here, just you wait," Nathan told Kotetsu. "You'll owe us, though." He winked.

Kotetsu laughed again. "Not sure Bunny would be okay with that..."

"We'll find something." He turned, smacked Antonio's ass, and followed the others.

"Hey!" Antonio snapped at him, but sighed and looked at Kotetsu. "Uh..."

"You know me now?"

"I do..."

Kotetsu sighed and took the cloth from Barnaby's face. The bleeding was done, for the time being anyway. "Look, we're cool. Just get going, okay?"

"Kotetsu..."

"It will be better if you all team up right now. I can't...risk it...so..."

Antonio nodded. "I really am sorry though."

"I know." Kotetsu waved him off. "Just go."

Antonio lingered, but turned and left shortly.

Kotetsu wished he could go. He wished he could go kick some ass and be the hero he was supposed to be. But he knew his time would run short again, leaving him as a burden to the others. It was true too that someone needed to be with Barnaby and Kotetsu wouldn't leave his side for anything.

As frustrating as it was, all he could do was sit there and wait.

Time ticked by so slowly, too slowly.

Kotetsu had no clue what was going on outside the building. Barnaby was still out. Time hit one hour, two hours, and he flopped down beside Barnaby. He wanted to turn on the radio but depending on what he might hear he might feel worse and he wasn't sure he could handle that. And if he couldn't handle it...he knew he better continue to wait.

He turned on his side and touched Barnaby's cheek. "Bunny, I wish you would wake up," he whispered, fully aware it would do no good. His mind had gone through what he could possibly do for him, and there was really nothing. He didn't know what toxins had been forced into Barnaby. And even if he did...

"I'm so sorry I can't help you," he said in Barnaby's ear. "I'm so sorry..." He felt like he failed Barnaby. If he lost him...despite the circumstances, he still felt he only had himself to blame. His eyes were wet.

Slowly he put an arm over Barnaby's stomach and curled in closer to him, being ever careful of his injury. If something happened to Barnaby, Kotetsu wanted at least that, time to be close with him, even if he wasn't awake.

Kotetsu hadn't meant to fall asleep. He would have liked to stay awake, in fact, but he dozed off next to Barnaby and slept like a rock. That is, until he was woken up suddenly, with an immediate headache.

"Quick! The ambulance is outside!" someone shouted and he felt movement next to him.

Antonio and Keith were scooping Barnaby up.

Kotetsu jumped to his feet and practically growled at them. "What the fuck do you think you're doing!" he asked, hands on Barnaby's shoulders. He still wasn't awake.

Keith stared at him with a hint of fear in his eyes, and Antonio even took a second to answer. "Ambulance," he finally spit out.

"Huh?" Kotetsu asked, and then looked around with his vision still blurry from sleep. He could see the other heroes, including Ivan. And he was alarmed to see the amount of blood on Ivan's legs, arms, and face. Almost more alarming was Edward being there, just as protective over Ivan as Kotetsu was over Barnaby.

"Get away!" Edward was saying even as Nathan tried to approach.

"Wh-wh..." Kotetsu stared.

"Ivan took quite a few blows. Our plan to go see Maverick sort of changed when we saw the action on the tv screens," Antonio explained.

"Yes! We couldn't leave him," Keith said, his bravery coming back.. "We got there and..."

"Stay away!" Edward again, and Kotetsu could hear the soothing tones of Nathan's voice as he tried to calm him.

"It was pretty terrible. He got attacked by the fake Tiger, and that got out of control...listen, let us take Barnaby to the ambulance Kotetsu, you know he needs help," Antonio begged him.

"If I can go with him," Kotetsu said instantly.

"You might not want to do that," Antonio said.

"Why!" Kotetsu was about ready to explode at him, his heart beating fast as he looked down at Barnaby's peaceful face.

"Because Maverick has Kaede."

Kotetsu spun to see Karina. She looked pretty beaten up. As concerned as he knew he should be for her, Kotetsu couldn't focus. "K-Kaede? Why? Why the fuck would Maverick have my little girl!" he nearly screamed and Karina cowered slightly – she never did that.

Kotetsu tried to control his breathing. He was really trying. He looked around the room at other things, including Edward finally relenting and letting Nathan take Ivan, carefully escorting him out of the room. He knew he should let Barnaby...but instead he freaked out again. "Why does that bastard have my girl!"

"She saw you on the news and came looking for you," Antonio stated, plain and simple and gently continued lifting Barnaby away.

By then, Kotetsu was shaking. Kaede. Barnaby. It was too much. "The hospital isn't safe, we can't trust it, not safe don't know if Maverick's goons are there, too, can't..." he raised a hand to his forehead, trying to steady himself.

"The ambulances were called here, all they know is there's injuries. No one knows Barnaby is here yet. And we'll kick Maverick's ass before he can do anything to the hospital," Karina said, trying to be firm but her voice shook.

"N-no..."

Antonio sighed. "Kotetsu..."

"Shut the hell up," Kotetsu snapped. He instantly felt awful for it.

"Tiger," Karina approached him, and Kotetsu knew damn well she'd heard his real name, if not a million times before then certainly right in that minute. "He needs help. You can't give it to him, but someone else can. You can help your daughter though. We all can. We're going with you." She spoke softly and Kotetsu wondered if she was an impersonator.

Before he could answer, Edward was at his side. "Let's kill the fucker. Put a bullet in his ugly face."

Normally Kotetsu didn't like such talk, but at that moment...

"Let's fuck him up Kotetsu, let's fuck him up so hard," Edward said and Kotetsu frowned. It was odd to hear him use his name.

He sighed and leaned forward to kiss Barnaby's lips, lingering slightly before he straightened up. "Okay...take him down," he finally said. He hated it. His heart felt like it went to pieces as he watched Antonio and Keith carry him away. He wondered what would happen when everyone saw an alive Barnaby being transported to the hospital...he wondered how Kaede was...

"There's something else you should know," Karina said and Kotetsu turned to see her wiping some dirt and blood off her arm.

"What?"

Edward beat her to answering. "Maverick has a fucking android."

Kotetsu stared. "Say what?"

"A. Fucking. Android." Edward was being incredibly unhelpful.

"The fake Tiger," Karina clarified. "It's...not alive. We found out when your daughter showed up and blasted it with water...didn't know your daughter was a NEXT."

"Uh...water?" That couldn't be right. That wasn't her power.

"It started sparking, and I forced up the faceplate and..." She shuddered. "Creepy."

"Water?" Kotetsu repeated dumbly.

"...Yes," Karina answered.

"That's not her power..." Unless she had two. Perhaps she had two, it wasn't unheard of if the fight with Jake was anything to go by. "You guys let her get taken!" He felt his anger surge almost to a breaking point. They were all safe, no one had followed Kaede...

"We tried. The Fake Tiger...was pretty nasty. He was gone before we knew where to go."

Kotetsu glared at her. How could the entire team fail to take down a single robot?

"Look, can we go?" Edward asked impatiently.

Kotetsu snapped back to attention. He ignored Karina saying something about waiting for the others to come back upstairs. No, he had to go now. He had to save his daughter, bust Maverick, and run as fast as he could to the hospital. He had to push away the idea that he would fail.

And so he rushed off. Karina shouted in surprise and he heard footsteps behind him. Kotetsu didn't need to turn around to know it was Edward. He wasn't going to slow down and wait for him, either.


	11. Way up high

He knew it was dumb. He knew it was dangerous. And he knew he had no clue how long they would last this time, but Kotetsu activated his powers as he left the building. He didn't worry about Edward, he would be fine. Instead he rushed out, past the ambulances and ignoring the cries of surprise from those outside.

It was when he had reached the Apollon building that he realized he actually didn't know where to go. Maverick had Kaede, but where? And he had stupidly run off without a way to...wait.

Kotetsu looked at his arm where he still had the call bracelet Karina had handed him. He had a way!

He started to call the others...but what if he called someone in charge? He didn't have Maverick's number, but the call bands were different. They were special networks to those who needed to be contacted, not like phones.

And so, he tried to reach their twisted CEO.

He succeeded. "Blue Rose," he heard Maverick say ever so calmly.

"It's me you asshole." Tiger glared at the tiny screen even though they were on voice only.

There was a pause, Maverick surprised, and then a voice that just plain sounded slimy. "Kotetsu. Still alive, then."

"Where the hell is my daughter!" Kotetsu demanded to know. He looked up to realize people were staring at him, including at least one police officer...who was making a call.

"Your little girl is safe and sound," Maverick chuckled.

Kotetsu wanted to punch his face in. "Where!" he asked again. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a taxi, a familiar vehicle...

"Come to the Justice Tower if you want to try and see her. I can't guarantee anything though, you see."

"Justice Tower?"

"You heard me." And then he was disconnected.

Kotetsu ran. He ran to the taxi. He had some power left, and could likely get to the tower but at the same time he could feel it draining. If it ran out partway there and he didn't have transportation, he was screwed.

He dove into the taxi, and Ben immediately peeled away from the curb.

Kotetsu still glowed, but Ben was fully aware of the power loss. So, there was no need to explain. He was curious though. "How'd you find me?" he asked, as Ben drove under a light just a second after it had actually turned red. He was usually such a safe driver...

Ben waited until he had to stop at another light and reached over to tap at a scanner that sat between the driver and passenger seats. "I had this on. It was really going nuts when you ran by the ambulances, and moreso when you stopped at Apollon."

"...How did you get there so fast?"

"Taxis have a way of being there when you need them."

"Liar," Kotetsu pouted as his glow died, leaving him feeling sapped of energy. "There's plenty of times I tried to get a taxi and instead got puddle water in my face."

Ben shrugged and they drove forward again. "So are you as bad as they said on the news?" He asked it so casually, and Kotetsu knew he hadn't believed a second of it.

"Terrible," he joked.

"I thought so. Look at that getup you're in..."

Kotetsu looked down at the hoodie he still had on. It dawned on him that he was going into danger very ill-prepared. He'd used up his power, he had no armor, he went alone... "Crap."

"Yes, it is."

"No, I mean...I am so not prepared for where I'm going."

"Where am I taking you?" Ben asked.

"...I like that you ask that after we've been driving a while." Kotetsu leaned back in his seat and sighed. "Justice Tower. ...They have my daughter," he said, squeezing his eyes shut and remembering why he had acted like an idiot. He was so pissed at himself. He couldn't help Kaede like that. It wasn't merely another call, where he'd break things and get damage fines. Those kinds of mistakes were nothing, normally his inability to think about things with a bit more strategy only bit him in the ass a little bit.

"And who has Kaede?"

Kotetsu didn't answer for a second, trying to calm his thoughts and form words. "Maverick has her...apparently he has some super android that all the others ran away from," he said, outrage threatening to boil over.

"Android?"

"The Fake Tiger..."

"Oh, that thing. Kotetsu, they might have reason to have lost. I've been seeing that thing...I thought it was another NEXT, I know you're not that coordinated when you run...on the news. It's creepy."

Kotetsu didn't answer, drawing the hood over his head and glaring out the windows of the taxi. Somehow, riding along with Ben and staring out the window at the civilians living out their day-to-day lives had a calming effect on him. Watching them made him feel as though nothing was wrong, Kaede was okay, Barnaby was okay, there were no androids and he wasn't being shown as a criminal...

His call bracelet went off and he jumped. He answered it, both hoping it would be Maverick while at the same time a little afraid of that. "Hello...?"

"Honey where are you?" Nathan answered, and that put Kotetsu at ease. Anyone other than Nathan or Antonio – or Ivan, actually – would have had him irritated.

"I'm on my way to the Justice Tower," Kotetsu answered. "I managed to contact Maverick...that's where he is. He told me so easily..."

"Of course he did, his confidence must be through the roof looking at how easily he's taking everyone out and warping their minds," Nathan said, voice dipping low and angry. Then he sighed. "We'll be there."

"Are you su-"

"We're coming with you!" Nathan insisted. "Don't make me get Blue Rose on here to repeat what she said to Handsome months ago. This is not just your fight."

Kotetsu bit his tongue. It was his daughter...but just as they had been Barnaby's parents, more people were endangered than just his family. Whatever Maverick was up to would not be good for Stern Bild.

"Good," Nathan said, taking his silence as acceptance. "We'll be there." He hung up before Kotetsu could protest.

Kotetsu leaned back, his head hurting. Overall he didn't feel well, a little sick. He was surprised he didn't feel completely miserable in addition. On top of everything that was happening, he sure hadn't been able to keep up with his medication. He only missed one or maybe two dosages, but that could still have an impact.

He felt like a fuck-up for forgetting to do at least that, and then he nearly laughed - there was the misery. He closed his eyes and tried to shut out the world around him, as looking out the window no longer helped and in fact, made him feel a little nauseous.

He didn't know what to do once he got there. It made no sense for Maverick to have suddenly turned into a bad guy. Had he always been bad? He had no clue. He never spent enough time in the man's presence. Only Barnaby had.

"Ben," he said, eyes opening slowly and he remembered he should probably share that important piece of news. "Barnaby is alive."

Ben's eyes widened, Kotetsu could see in the rearview mirror. "He is?"

"Yes. You haven't seen him because Maverick tried to off him himself. ...Wait, how could you not know this? The scanner must have gone nuts when he was brought to the ambulance."

"You probably ran out of there before they actually saw that he was alive. And then all I heard was stuff about you," Ben answered.

That's right. Kotetsu had run out of there with Hundred Power activated, likely before Antonio and Keith had actually reached the ambulances.

"Kotetsu, don't let Maverick find that out."

"Huh?" Kotetsu stared. He hadn't really thought about telling Maverick, but was surprised to hear Ben mention anything about it.

"He thinks he's dead still...unless the news reached him. If it hasn't, don't let him know."

Kotetsu nodded. "Okay..." He had to keep him safe. And then Kotetsu felt to the other side of the seat as Ben suddenly jerked the wheel and took them into a back alley. "What the hell!"

Ben drove a few feet farther until they were parked behind a dumpster. "Kotetsu, step out of the car with me. You may have been ill-prepared for everything, but I'm not."

"What?" Kotetsu stared at him, jaw dropped and not understanding at all. But Ben said no more, so Kotetsu had to get out of the car.

He closed the backdoor seat and met Ben at the back as he popped open the trunk. Ben pushed aside some odds and ends that he kept with him in the cab and pulled out a case. Kotetsu recognized it, but could it really be...?

"I knew you would need it sometime...and there was no way I would get rid of it," Ben said, handing him the case. "This may not be as good as your current one, but it's better than that damn thing you're wearing now."

Kotetsu didn't answer, instead opening the case. It was exactly what he thought it was.

He was staring at his old crappy suit.

"Did you wash this right? It's um, it's really tight." The suit hadn't wedged itself up Kotetsu's ass yet, but he was sure it would later and he did not want that to be right in the middle of a fight.

"I did. It's fine." Ben gathered up Kotetsu's clothes.

"You don't have to save that stuff." Kotetsu glared at the hoodie.

"What if you need it later? Actually, when this is all over I bet I can make a killing selling this."

Kotetsu laughed a little. "I'd get annoyed, but you deserve the money. Not that it'll bring you much," he said with a shrug. Who would buy some dumb hoodie just because he wore it? Nevermind, he had more important things to think about, like Kaede.

He'd changed into his suit in that empty alley, squirming into it despite the fact that it was so, so tight. He was unsure of whether or not he'd gotten bigger or if it had just always been tight and he never noticed until after being in the newer suit.

Regardless of how tight it was and how on display he felt, he knew they had to get moving, and so with a sigh he crawled back inside the taxi. It wasn't proper hero transport, but he didn't care. Ben started the cab up moments later and they carefully drove out and onto a main road again.

Kotetsu was relieved to see there were no police swarming and waiting for them as he had feared. There were no black vans following them either and he had fully expected some creeps tailing them through the city.

All in all, it was a completely normal cab ride without the ticking of the price meter.

The Justice Tower came into view and Kotetsu's stomach hurt. Nothing about it looked out of the ordinary, but he knew something bad was inside. He knew Maverick was in there, but what else? The bastard wouldn't be alone. Maybe he had Fake Tiger and a whole crew of men dressed in black with black gloves and sunglasses and guns.

Or maybe there would be NEXTs, like the one that had attacked Barnaby. What if all the bad NEXTs had alligned with Maverick? Kotetsu didn't know how to handle that.

They pulled up to the curb and Kotetsu noted that the area was devoid of people. Maverick had to have arranged for that too. It was both good and bad, as Kotetsu didn't want to be seen and stared at, but it also made the approach that much creepier. It was a cold and still relatively sunny day, but he felt as though a dark cloud of doom should have been swirling around the top of the tower.

Ben promised to go find help, he would do what he could. He still knew of strings he might be able to pull, and had some resources since he had been a sponsor. He wouldn't be able to do anything very fancy but he still might be able to do something.

Soon he drove away, and Kotetsu stood alone wishing there was at least some wind to rustle his cape and make him feel cool because he needed something to grasp onto.

There was no wind, he was in a state of worry and panic with no idea what was next, and regardless of all that, he had to go in.

He found himself on the elevator as the first floor was empty and useless. It didn't matter that he didn't know the floor to go to – once he was on the elevator, the door closed and all the buttons lit up before he started moving upward. Clearly Maverick had control and was bringing him right where he needed to. It sent a chill down his spine.

Too soon. It was too soon. Kotetsu took deep breaths and wondered when he became such a coward. He used to rush into battles without much thought! But then, his daughter had never been in danger. So many things were different.

The elevator door opened and he marched down a hallway before coming to a dark room. It was immediately clear that he was in the very top of the Justice Tower, in the head. That sort of creeped him out. When he saw Maverick however, his location immediately stopped bothering him.

He didn't just see Maverick. He saw Rotwang and Fake Tiger. No Kaede.

Kotetsu stopped before them. "Where's my daughter!" he yelled.

"Safe," Maverick responded, a sly smile on his face. "I'm afraid I can't say the same for Barnaby."

Kotetsu's hands balled into fists and he had to hold back that Barnaby was alive. He was still angry at the thought Maverick would hurt him though. "Bastard. You'll pay for this!" he said, getting into a battle stance. He didn't want to hear his reasons for what he did. It all melted down to one thing for criminals anyway: Greed. His cowardice was gone and he was ready to rush in. "I'm going to take you out!"

"I wouldn't do that," Rotwang said, waving a finger. "My wonderful H-01 will rip you to pieces."

"H..H what?" Kotetsu repeated, his stance quickly losing any of its possible intimidation while he shot them a stupified look. It was just an android...it took a bit for him to realize it was describing the model.

"Barnaby's parents were extremely talented with robots..and it was easy to find and pick up on their work. You thought Cis was tough?" Rotwang smirked, and Kotetsu got the disturbing vibe that the android was like a child to Rotwang. "H-01 is developed far past her."

So, that's what the asshole was doing there. "I'll take it down! I'll take this twisted thing down with my own hands."

Maverick and Rotwang just watched him and laughed, both of them. Maverick sighed. "If you can defeat H-01, then perhaps you deserve your daughter back. If not, well, she's better off with someone who can protect her."

Kotetsu swallowed. "Oh yea? 'Protect her'? And what do you plan to do with her?" he asked.

"That's not really for you to know...but oh, young minds..." His gaze met Kotetsu's. "They can be molded, shaped so easily."

The minute he heard that, Kotetsu flew forward. He knew what Maverick meant. And he was not going to let that happen to his girl. So he rushed at the man, fist out, ready to punch his face in.

Except that H-01 got between them and swung its arm, knocking Kotetsu back painfully. He landed in a pile of limbs and cape on the ground, grunting at the pain.

Rotwang decided to taunt him. "Oh, you thought it would be so simple? You really are as slow as everyone says, rushing in without thinking..."

Kotetsu was on his feet and going forward again. His mind raced as he desperately tried to find some kind of strategy, but he couldn't. He was all too aware that his powers weren't back, though they would be soon. And then they would be gone.

He had a window of maybe a couple of minutes to try and do real damage to the thing...

The thing then hit him again, kicking him before extending a nasty looking black...saw-sword thing from its arm and walking at him.

Kotetsu wasn't a fan of getting cut in half, naturally, so he ran.

He didn't have anywhere to run though, he quickly found out. The top of the tower had a lot of room, he could run a fair distance, but he didn't actually go anywhere. He couldn't hide from the thing, it could see him where ever he went, and if he wasn't careful he could get cornered.

Not that it was in a hurry. The H-01 marched at him purposely, but it only marched.

And quite frankly, that irritated Kotetsu. It wasn't alive, and yet he couldn't help but feel like the H-01 had already decided he wasn't a threat and was boredly following him until he was tired or trapped so it could slice him up. The nerve! And Kotetsu didn't have much to protect him...he had a suit that traced every line of his body and exposed him but didn't protect him from shit.

He felt a rush as he made his second lap around the room. He smiled. His powers were back, he was going to be okay. He circled around until he was facing the H-01 and activated his powers.

Again, he rushed forward, dodging the sword but just barely. He kicked the H-01 hard in the chest. It didn't budge, instead swatting at Kotetsu with the sword again. Kotetsu fell back and rolled on the ground before getting to his feet again.

Two more rushes forward before he made any progress – soon the sword fell away, the H-01 disarmed. Kotetsu didn't waste time to gloat over it, although he made a mental note to brag about it later. He took advantage of his speed and tried to surprise it at every turn, coming from all directions, punching, occasionally kicking even if it wasn't his thing.

He wasn't getting anywhere, but he was comforted by the thought that he disarmed it.

Then it pulled out a gun.

Kotetsu just barely managed to jump out of the way as it fired, a pink beam blasting through the wall. For a moment all he could do was stare at the hole it left, edges of the wall where metal had actually partially melted from the heat.

Someone made a sound, a sound of joy it sounded like and he was sure it was Rotwang. Kotetsu couldn't make a noise, his heart pounding so hard he swore he could hear it loud and clear.

He was terrified. Absolutely terrified.

But he had to keep trying. Just avoid the gun...avoid the gun he told himself. He jumped around and couldn't help think that he was copying Barnaby in the way that he hopped around so much sometimes. If only his Bunny was there...

He avoided two more shots and missed too more attacks himself, instead getting hit hard in the chest. He was sure he heard a crunch.

But Hundred Power could he-oh. It faded. It died away and Kotetsu lay on the ground coughing. It hurt, his chest hurt, his entire body hurt so bad. He'd been hurt worse, certainly, but that didn't help him. His head filled with pain and Night Terror's eyes, always happy to just invade his mind whenever he already wasn't doing well.

They were just a mental image, and yet started to make him sick and sad.

Somehow he pulled himself off the ground as he heard the H-01 approach. His body fought him, but he ran again and stopped in front of Maverick and Rotwang. They stood higher than him on a raised part of the floor, but he was still in front of them.

H-01 raised the gun, but didn't shoot. It couldn't. It would hit Kotetsu, but would also hit Maverick and Rotwang.

"Ha!" Kotetsu coughed, eyes going wide at the pain he felt as he attempted to laugh defiantly. He stopped trying right away and looked over his shoulder. "No what are you-"

Maverick pointed a handgun at him and Kotetsu's words trailed off into nothing. "Getting killed by H-01, I can understand, it's powerful. Getting killed by a man with a gun." Maverick made a disappointed sound. "Pathetic."

He made to pull the trigger and Kotetsu dodged and ran. He heard no gunshot, only laughter, and growled. He was so panicked and high on adrenaline that he was jumpy as hell.

And careless. He was only a few feet away when he heard a very real click and saw, felt the horrible beam emerge from the gun.

It was fast. It was TOO fast. He didn't get caught by the center of the beam but he was still caught and his world exploded into pain and cold. He'd been blasted clear through the wall, out into the cold air many, many stories above the street.

He could do nothing but fall.

He couldn't even move and started to wonder if possibly he'd lost a limb. He couldn't feel anything for a horrible moment in time, like his conscious remained and his body was gone. Dead, he had to be dead. How could anyone hurt so badly while at the same time feeling nothing?

The cold air told him he wasn't dead if he could feel it, but he still fell toward the ground like a bag of bricks. So soon he would be dead and wouldn't have the time to overthink it anymore. It occurred to him that he had been thinking about how alive or dead he was for an awful long time for someone falling, and that's when he actually realized – he was no longer falling.

He was being held by someone, moving back up through the cold air and then crashing in through a window. The glass bit at him and he could feel that too. He wished he'd stayed numb a little longer. Even if he had, he could still see where he had started to bleed. He was then clued in again as he saw his suit was all kinds of ripped up.

Damn! As poor a suit as it was, he still liked how it looked most of the time...now it did nothing. Under the right circumstances it could probably be considered 'fanservice' but...

"Fanservice?" A voice said.

The sound went to his head and Kotetsu felt dizzy instantly. His head hurt. He tried to look up at his saviour but his vision blurred. "Umm...hnn..what...?"

"Why were you saying fanservice...?"

Slowly he came into focus, although not fully. At first the red and white coloring confused him. But the faceplate lifted and he saw the last person he expected to see. "Bunny!"

"Kotetsu, you're hurt," Barnaby said, worry evident in his face even to Kotetsu's current faulty vision. It seemed he dropped the fanservice thing.

"Heh...everything hurts, Bunny, everything...how did you get here?"

"I walked, and then I got in a car, and it drove-"

"Cut the shit!" Kotetsu coughed, his eyes going wide at just how awful his chest felt. "You were passed out when I left!" He was happy to see him, but he was also in complete disbelief.

"Yea...I made it to the hospital, and it wasn't anything major, I mean, since I was where they could treat it. If we'd waited much longer I'd have..."

"Don't...don't finish that." He felt uncomfortable being held by Barnaby. It wasn't that it was Barnaby himself, usually he'd love to be in his arms, but his body cried out for him to lay down and close his eyes. "I need to lay down...put me down...they cured you awful fast..."

"They cured me before. We ran into this NEXT months ago, she'd made me sick then too, I had forgotten that..." Barnaby said gently. "We're in a storage room, so I shouldn't-"

"Put me down. Please? Please put me down?" Kotetsu found himself begging as his vision began to go bad again.

"Kotetsu..."Barnaby hesitated, but set him down carefully on the hard floor. "No, this isn't right," he said as he did it. "Kotetsu this hard floor, you should..."

"No..." Kotetsu sighed against the floor. Not ideal, but he rested against it, losing the strength to hold himself up in any sense. It all hurt. Barnaby was okay. He just wanted to sleep.

"Kotetsu, what happened up there?"

"Maverick...H-01," Kotetsu said. "I'm going to...take a nap."

"Huh? No, wait!" Barnaby's voice sounded panicked. "Kotetsu you can't close your eyes! I need you!"

How over the top. "S'alright. Just napping."

"...I still need information!" Barnaby pleaded and Kotetsu felt his hand on his side. "Kotetsu please, please don't close your eyes. We got the Apollon van here, the others, we have your good suit, but more importantly we have first aid, we..."

"I just need a nap." He couldn't move, and he couldn't fight it. All his little cuts throbbed with pain, though still nothing compared to his chest.

Despite Barnaby's repeated pleading for him not to close his eyes, despite the fact he sounded like he was even crying, Kotetsu's world went dark and he slipped off.

"Come to say hello?"

Kotetsu opened his eyes to see Night Terror.

He had no idea where he was. He could only describe it as a big dark...dark. It was blackness, nothing, no discernible sky or ground and yet he was standing on something solid. It was cold. He could breath, he didn't feel dizzy, and he was staring at a smiling Night Terror.

And that guy was dead.

"Am I dead?" The was the only logical conclusion, right?

"Hopefully," Night Terror said, sounding totally unconcerned.

"Why are you here?" Kotetsu asked. He had a sinking feeling that despite his heroics, he hadn't made it to Heaven. Well, that's okay, he had done it to help people not to reward himself. Still...

"I'm going to follow you everywhere you go, you know."

Kotetsu shook his head even though he knew it was true. Night Terror had been a permanent nightmare in his head ever since the torture during Barnaby's fight with Jake. It wasn't always at the front of his mind, and he could go a couple of weeks without any bad dreams, but Night Terror, his eyes in particular, had never gone away. "Why?" he asked, staring at him. He had a feeling he should have been scared.

"That's for you to answer," Night Terror replied. "As long as you are unhappy, I will stay here."

Kotetsu made a face. He suspected it was something like that, how unoriginal!

"Who cares? I'm still accomplishing what I set out to, unlike you."

"How did you...?" Kotetsu answered his own question right away. Of course Night Terror had read his mind, he lived in it. "Nevermind. ...Am I dead?"

"You asked me once. I can't tell you. How hard is that to understand?"

Night Terror was extremely unhelpful. Kotetsu wanted to be angry but he couldn't work up the rage. He was having trouble working up any emotions. Maybe he was in 'Tango' or whatever they called it; he never understood why the neutral part of the afterlife was named after a dance. 'Limbo' something whispered, and Kotetsu ignored it since dances weren't really on his mind.

He at least had an urge to go back, not just for the sake of being alive, but to fight Maverick, and save everyone – not Kaede alone, or Barnaby or the other heroes, but everyone. It occurred to him he'd gotten so wrapped up in his own unhappiness and his focus on Barnaby that he forgot that part of himself that cared so much about saving people. He did it still, but felt numb to it anymore.

That's when he felt his first pang of a real emotion: sadness. When had he lost sight of everything he'd set out to do, the promise he wanted to keep for Tomoe? Who had he turned into?

'Bunny' his mind whispered, and he felt intense affection. That's right. He'd been distracted by letting himself be happy, because of and for Barnaby. But Barnaby couldn't be the reason he kept on trying. Neither could Kaede actually. Even saving people couldn't be the reason he kept himself going.

He had to do it for himself, without a crutch. He had to let himself be happy, for his own sake and not someone else's.

And that's what he'd been trying to do, and doing okay with until his powers began to fade, and Barnaby found his life turned upside down. That's when the fear and anger settled in. Who was Maverick, taking his daughter and trying to kill his loved one? And not only that, but framing him for murder, messing up his life as it tried to improve...

Kotetsu had to go after him.

"What, you think you can take him? What's wrong with you?" Night Terror taunted and Kotetsu felt more whispers around him, telling him to stay while a particularly quiet one said 'go'.

"I don't know...I know I have to try," Kotetsu muttered, listening to the quieter whisper. He had yet to move, even though he worked up the will to at least want to. That had to be worth something, right?

"You'll just get killed," Night Terror said matter of factly. He blinked, which surprised Kotetsu. Until then Night Terror's eyes just stayed open and on him.

"I have to," he repeated.

"You'll be a laughing stock, and maybe even put your daughter in more danger."

Kotetsu's eye twitched. He wanted to be cool. He wanted to be useful. But if he just came out looking stupid...it wouldn't matter, because he had to try to save her. "I'm not staying here."

"Really? But this is your favorite place to be."

"No it's not!" Kotetsu yelled and the sound almost immediately evaporated into nothing. It was creepy. But Kotetsu didn't dwell on it.

"Then why don't you leave?"

He was trying. He had to force himself to move. With concentration he moved an arm, and a leg.

Night Terror looked uneasy. "Stay here. It's more familiar than you know, you'll see."

"No!" Kotetsu shouted at him. He tried to charge forward. He lurched ahead a few steps but was still stuck.

Night Terror started to back up. "What's the point? What if you are dead?"

"I'm not. I know I'm not," Kotetsu declared, pulling and struggling free of the invisible bonds holding him.

"If you die, you could see Tomoe. Isn't that tempting?"

"Nope." Kotetsu pulled free then, faced with the thought he'd never been so bad off to actually pursue. No, he was not so far gone. Night Terror was wrong. He was twisted, cruel.

And Kotetsu wanted nothing more to do with him.

Night Terror continued to back away. Kotetsu wasn't about to let him off that easily. He charged at him with a scream, fist out and punched him hard in the face.


	12. Or down low

He woke up with a yelp.

Kotetsu's breathing came fast, urgent, painful. His vision continued to pulse in and out of focus for a few moments, as it had when he was...falling? Floating. Caught and carried?

Oh yea. He'd been saved by Barnaby. Saved and left in the...where was he? He looked around, finding himself in a storage room. At least, that's what it appeared to be, with boxes and some file cabinets, some broken machinery that had been stuffed in to the corners. He squinted and saw it looked more like kitchen appliances, which made sense. There was a restaurant in the tower. There was a desk too that looked to have been used recently. It made the place seem a little friendlier.

Other than that...he was alone. He was injured and alone and he didn't like it. Everything still hurt. Regardless he couldn't just stay there laying on the floor. He had to move, and with a groan he sat up.

"DAAAD!" a voice screamed, and Kaede came flying out of seemingly nowhere. Kotetsu's heart caught and filled with joy as he saw his little girl. She ran towards him and Kotetsu was afraid she'd hug him – he would love that, if his body wasn't so wrecked. But she stopped herself at the last moment, nearly tripping over him as she skidded to a halt.

She looked at him. He looked at her. "Kaede?" he croaked out and then cringed at his own voice.

"Dad!" she repeated, quieter, and fell to her knees beside him. "Dad you're okay, you..."

"Come here," he said, unable to resist even for his own healthy and he put on an arm to drag her into a hug.

She resisted at first but leaned toward him, only letting him have a one armed hug. "You're hurt, I shouldn't hug you...I thought you were dead I thought..." and then she started crying, burying her head in his shoulder.

Kaede looked afraid but otherwise unharmed. Her hair was a mess and her jacket and jeans were dirty, but she didn't look injured. She was probably traumatized, though. "Kaede honey, what..." he coughed, hard.

"Shhh, Dad. They brought me back to use as a hos..hostage. They didn't hurt me. I don't know why..."

Kotetsu wasn't sure either. As much as he had feared her being roughed up to get him worked into a rage, he was surprised she was okay. "What did they do?"

"Put me in a room, tied me to a chair and put guns on me."

His head pounded. "...How did you get out?" Kotetsu asked, gently nudging Kaede off a little. He started trying to get up. It was hard.

"I talked them out of it. I ran away and looked for you. Edward said you were dropped off here and I was afraid to wake you up incase you were..."

"..." Kotetsu stared and continued trying to get to his feet. So, Kaede was worried he was dead when she saw him. There was no need to dwell on that. "You didn't use your powers? I heard you have two, by the way."

"I have one." She looked at her hands briefly before trying to help her father up, almost comical when she was so much smaller than him. But he got to his feet. "I can copy."

Well that was unexpected. "Copy...?"

"If I touch someone I get their power. It goes away when I touch someone else." She looked up at Kotetsu, who swayed on his feet.

He was so unbelievably dizzy. His head hurt so much more and he thought his legs would crumple beneath him. It didn't help when he heard what sounded like an explosion somewhere above them and the building vibrated.

It made him very aware of where he was. "Kaede...I...I have to go up there. What's going on? Is Bu...Barnaby okay? How about everyone else? Where's Maverick? Where's Rotwang?" He felt a little bad not pursuing the topic of her copy-cat powers. But he could learn about them later, when things weren't so urgent.

"Barnaby was okay. So was everyone else, uh..." She looked down. "Except Rotwang. After I convinced them to let me go, he and Maverick got in a fight. Those creepy robots are everywhere, Fire Emblem attacked one and it hit Rotwang and...he kind of fell out a window."

Well, Kotetsu hadn't wanted him to die, but he couldn't find it in him to be sad Rotwang fell out a window. More than that though... "Robots? More than one?"

"Barnaby blew one up with a gun. Maverick had a lot more waiting."

Well, that had to be total chaos. Kotetsu imagined the explosion he had heard was one of those hellish guns.

And that made him afraid all over again. He took a step forward and groaned. "Kaede, stay here...I need to go up there."

"But...you're hurt!" she said, incredulously.

"It doesn't matter. Everyone else is up there. They will need another hand, even if I can't do much." He nearly called himself useless, but found the urge dwindling away surprisingly fast. Likely it was due to Kaede's presence.

"Dad..."

"I'm going."

"...Then I'm coming with you."

"Huh!" he looked at her. "No. NO. Absolutely not. You're staying safe."

"But you're hurt! You can't go alone!"

"I can take care of myself," he grumbled, though he knew he needed to heal. If he got hit hard enough that would be it for him. His powers weren't quite back though.

"No. I'm going. What if someone comes in here anyway? I'm safer with you!"

Kotetsu shuddered as something nudged and poked at his mind. He began to feel like he should just listen to Kaede and do what she said – no. "Stay. All the danger is up there." The feeling receded slightly.

"Fine. Leaving me out again," she said with a sigh, looking down.

"What?"

"You never told me you were a hero. You kept it from me and left me alone." She crossed her arms, eyes angry. "And now you're hurt bad, and you still want me to stay put."

"If you knew I was a hero you'd worry..." Kotetsu said, though he felt guilty as the words left his mouth. That was part of the reason, the other was that he didn't want it to lead to her being in danger. For all his efforts, all the fights and upsets, he had ultimately failed in that respect.

"I'll be worrying down here too! Dad, I'll be okay. I really will." Another explosion from above them. Kotetsu heard it and reached for a file cabinet to steady himself, even if the cabinet itself was a little wobbly. Kaede looked toward the ceiling and then to her father. "Don't leave me behind again!"

That feeling in his mind again. It reminded him slightly of when he took the pills for the first time...shit. The fact he was feeling that couldn't be good.

And despite that the thought he should listen to Kaede just kept coming through. It started to get a little painful. Withdrawal symptoms and guilt, how lovely. He would have growled to himself if it didn't hurt.

"I..."

"I'll help, I really will. I only need to touch someone to use their power."

That was true. His thoughts urged him to take her, a painful stabbing feeling in his head by then. He almost wanted to cry. "Fine," he relented, wanting to go back upstairs and not wanting to leave Kaede alone by then.

She stared at him, and then hurried forward and took his hand. He squeezed it lightly, the effort making him tired again. He wanted to lay back down, but knew he couldn't. "It's going to be Hell up there," he commented.

Kaede squeezed his hand back and looked up at him as they walked slowly toward the door. "It'll be okay, Dad. It'll be okay."

Kotetsu wasn't prepared for what he saw as he again arrived at the top of the tower. It was easy enough to get up there. Even if he heard rumbles and explosions, it was the top being destroyed, not the elevators and stairwells. He certainly didn't feel safe as they went up, but at least they were able to.

The elevator opened and someone flew by them, rather limply. Kotetsu was ready to freak out until he saw it was a damn H-22 or whatever. It got right back up, and immediately seemed to see him. It charged at him and Kaede. Kotetsu screamed like a girl but gathered his thoughts enough to step in front of Kaede to protect her.

The android was taken out again, quickly knocked aside hard by Antonio. Only then was Kotetsu actually able to see the mess in front of him.

All his friends and even Edward were engaged in battle. Those who didn't have an android directly on them were helping someone else. Some moved slowly and Kotetsu had a sinking feeling as he realized that his friends were tired. They were strong, but they were human and could not last forever. He noticed it was strangely calm and windy and…was that snow? Inside!

He started to stagger forward to help. He couldn't see Barnaby right away, but he was in there and in danger. Kaede took his arm and Antonio stopped in front of him. "Don't come in here, Kotetsu! You need to stay away…" he insisted. "You won't last!" And then he was off again.

His words took Kotetsu by surprise. No one ever told him he wouldn't last. Even when Barnaby learned about his power loss, he didn't discourage him. But, with thought, Kotetsu remembered how bad he looked in addition to how awful he felt.

"Dad, come on," Kaede said, taking his hand and leading him in as soon as it was clear a few feet in front of them. "Ignore him."

"Kaede…" Sleep sounded like a good idea again.

"You have…you need an hour before you can use your power again, right?" He started to ask how she knew that, but stopped himself quickly. His Hundred Power was explained on the show often enough. "It's been a while since you were down there."

True, but that feeling he knew so well hadn't returned to him. Regardless, he let Kaede lead him very slowly and carefully along the wall around the fight. "Where are we going?"

"After Rotwang fell, and before they brought me from that room, I saw there was a control panel. That must be for the androids." She sounded less and less like a child.

"Oh, uh…okay." That would be bad. What if he pushed the wrong button and suddenly they all tossed grenades at their attackers? He supposed it could go the other way, he could hit a button and make them all start dancing instead of trying to kill his friends. He really had no idea how that sort of technology worked…he was still unfamiliar with some of his suit much to the creepy mechanic's annoyance. The control panel she saw could be for absolutely nothing useful to them, that might be worse.

"We have to find Maverick too."

"Mm. I still want to know why they let you go…" Maverick had to have something planned. Kotetsu wasn't completely sure he actually wanted to find him.

Kaede shrugged and tugged his hand again as they went as if to encourage him to keep going. They had to stop several times when they came to a few large holes blown through the wall. Slowly Kotetsu understood why he had felt the wind and cold. Looking up at the large hole in the roof told him why there was snow, too.

That hole in the roof had to be worth something. He didn't dwell on it, instead following Kaede and being as alert as he could so he could keep her safe. He was surprised no one had crashed into or attacked them, but looking he could see that the action had moved away from the large gaps in the walls. There was no point to that, he thought. They'd just have more destruction to deal with on the other side.

The hardest part of their little journey was ignoring the yells. His friends were getting hurt and he was walking away. But he was of little use to them powerless, and as brave as his girl was he couldn't leave her…

And that's when he realized he hadn't quite noticed the pain in his chest dulling until he felt a faint tingle, a wash of relief over his whole body-

His powers had returned.

"They're back!" he said happily.

Kaede stopped to look at him. "Huh?"

"They're-" Before he could activate them someone slammed into him, nearly knocking him out of the tower again.

Somehow he was unsurprised to see it was Barnaby. What he was surprised to see was the faceplate up and that same wild look he'd worn after they found each other by the dumpster. He was panicked.

"Hey…Bunny hey!"

"Argh!" Barnaby slammed him into the wall. "Murderer!"

"No!" Kotetsu struggled in his grasp. He hadn't gotten to even try healing. He felt something crack, followed by immense pain in his back.

"Mr. Barnaby!" Kaede took a couple of steps but stopped.

Kotetsu was shoved hard against the wall again and Barnaby leaned close, their noses nearly touching. "You have to leave," he growled.

It sounded more like a warning than a threat. "No." Kotetsu wasn't going anywhere.

"Leave, please!" The panicked look stayed but there was something a little more familiar in Barnaby's eyes. "Please, I'll hurt you. The androids will hurt you."

"Did Maverick get to you again?" Kotetsu tried to keep his voice quiet, as if the androids would hear him and come over. He hated that man. Instead of being stuck where they were he and Barnaby could be having a nice dinner together but noooo, bad guys just had to fuck up everything. It was such a ridiculous thought and yet all he could focus on as he looked at Barnaby.

"No. Simply seeing him…" Barnaby's mouth twitched. "Kotetsu I keep slipping. I'll try to kill you. I keep losing what's real. …I'll kill you."

Kotetsu fell silent, staring in Barnaby's eyes. He didn't understand. "You would go that far?" he finally asked.

"I don't know. I think so," Barnaby said. "Activate your powers, get your daughter and leave, please!" Tears filled his eyes and his voice was thick.

"I can't," Kotetsu said gently. "Don't you understand I can't just leave everyone?"

"And don't you understand you're worth a hundred of every one of them!" Barnaby yelled, shoving Kotetsu hard. "I won't kill you! You have to leave!" And then as quickly as that he blinked, grabbed Kotetsu around the throat and whirled quickly, tossing him viciously down to the floor. His memory had slipped.

He nearly cracked his skull. The pain was dulled only because he'd started to feel numb. Kotetsu activated then, knowing he couldn't afford to put it off any longer. He needed to heal. If he wanted to have a chance against Barnaby, he had to heal. His heart ached at the thought of fighting him.

Well, maybe it ached because Barnaby kicked him hard in the chest.

He kicked him again and Kotetsu was seeing spots even with his power. He feared another kick but to his surprise Barnaby was knocked aside, and hard. He nearly fell out of the tower himself. Kotetsu focused and saw Kaede glowing, standing over him. "You leave my dad alone!" she yelled at Barnaby.

"Your dad?" Barnaby asked.

"My dad! I thought you loved him!" she cried angrily. "What's your problem?"

"My…problem? Love? Don't you know what he's done?" Barnaby replied, stepping forward slowly.

"He didn't do it!" Kaede replied.

Then the fight came to them and Kotetsu heard no more of the exchange - Ivan landed on Kotetsu very suddenly and knocked the wind out of him. So far his healing process was just not working. "Ivan?" Kotetsu choked out.

"Mr. Tiger!" Ivan's voice sounded tired. Kotetsu knew he'd been right in thinking about the exhaustion. "You're hurt!"

"I know." Kotetsu gently shoved at him and the two helped each other get up. "Anyone take one of these things down yet?"

"Barnaby blasted one with a gun. But we can't seem to get another gun, and he took his somewhere. He's acting strange."

Kotetsu had time to nod, before he pushed Ivan aside. An android rushed at them and Kotetsu stepped in front to take the brunt of the attack while his power worked. He stopped the thing though not without pain. He hadn't fully healed. Blood seeped from his cuts and it was as if he had gone backwards and reopened them.

He couldn't move the android at first, until small hands joined him. Kaede was pushing it away, and even ducking as it took a swing at her. Then she backed off because while she could handle the speed, she didn't know how to fight. Kotetsu knocked its arms away and Keith blew it completely off to the side.

Kotetsu turned to see where Barnaby was and that's when he noticed their very dire situation.

No Barnaby, but Edward and Pao-Lin were behind him. Others stood around him. And around all of them? Those hellish creations surrounded them, raising and charging their pink guns, and everyone was too tired and spent to try anymore.

Of course, they were about to die, and his wounds finally started trying to heal again. Kotetsu could have laughed. All he wanted to do was cry. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. He wanted to have the end of his life spent in his lover's arms, not in a freezing cold place surrounded by androids, knowing he could save no one. The snow was a nice touch though, he thought in an effort to find something nice to grasp onto.

They were doomed.

He and his friends stood together, while Kaede found him again and let herself be closed completely in his arms. He could hear her crying. He felt that way too and was unable to stop the tears coming down his cheeks, mingled with the cold of the snow that continued to fall through the roof.

He'd tried so hard, he really had. If only he had known months ago how it would end…then again, he wasn't sure how much he would have, or could have, changed.

The guns continued to charge even as Kaede whispered she was frightened. Kotetsu squeezed his eyes closed so he didn't have to see it all happen. He couldn't see his friends die, and he couldn't see Kaede die. He'd have stood in front of her if he thought the beam wouldn't just cut through him and move onto her.

The guns had a bit of a high pitched noise as they charged. With his eyes closed he unwillingly focused on nothing but that noise, feeling his powers die then. His body hurt again. It didn't matter. Soon the guns would charge, shoot, and…he opened his eyes. The sound had stopped.

The guns were dark, the androids unmoving and totally lifeless, not even any lights on. The other heroes looked around, confused.

"What just happened?" Kotetsu asked.

"They…died?" Keith tried to answer. And maybe he was right.

But all of them were afraid to move. What if one step woke them back up? They couldn't risk that. Kotetsu didn't say it out loud, no one did, but he knew they all felt that way.

That's why he yelled "No!" as Edward got annoyed and stepped forward, and began to walk away entirely.

Kotetsu's heart raced, but nothing happened. He heard a relieved sigh and Nathan stepped forward too. "They've been shut down. Let's move before they're back."

And move they did, surging ahead together as a group. Soon enough though they realized they didn't know where to go. Maverick and Barnaby were nowhere to be seen. "Um, where are we going?" Kotetsu asked, ignoring his various aches.

"Oh…there's some stairs that lead down, to where I was trapped." Kaede stepped out as a leader of sorts, and had the situation been different he would have found that funny.

"I see…" If a control panel existed for the androids, it would have been somewhere safe. So downstairs it was.

There was a brief discussion among them in regards to whether or not they should split up. In the end it was decided that would be utterly pointless. Even if the androids woke back up, they might not last long enough to bring the message to the rest of the group.

So they all went together, following quietly behind a ten year old girl. No one knew what awaited them down there. More androids? A nasty NEXT? A bomb to end it all at once?

Kotetsu stopped and the others paused behind them as they went down the short staircase and entered a hallway.

"Safety mode," were the first words they heard, growled by Maverick."

And before anyone could stop him, Kotetsu was off. He ran forward, toward the room at the end of the hall with its door open and that rat Maverick's voice drifting out to him. He rushed into the dark room to see what Kaede had described, a control panel that was situated beneath several screens, each one focused on strange rooms, filled with spikes. He didn't care to examine it anymore, because as soon as he saw Maverick standing off to the side he went at him.

He was clobbered out of the way, a fist colliding with his head and sending him flying painfully into a railing that lined a couple steps leading to a lower section of the room. There he saw a chair and an untied rope…no doubt that's where Kaede had been.

Barnaby didn't come after him. Kotetsu pulled himself up slowly from the floor, surprised. If Barnaby slipped again, why didn't he attack him? He dragged himself up the steps as the others entered the room. They all stopped, except for Kaede who went to her father. Kotetsu smiled at her as she hugged him again, more hugs than he had received from her in a long time. If only it was a moment where he could be completely happy…

Instead he had to focus. Finding Maverick again wasn't hard, and he was surprised to see the man still standing there, but he looked like hell. Maverick's face was bruised, clothing torn in places and he was holding his chest in obvious pain.

Barnaby stood before him in his suit with his helmet off. He punched Maverick hard in the stomach once. "Why did you do it!" he was crying. "Why!"

He punched him again, and again, brutal hits, and it was when he started his signature kicking that Kotetsu and the others started to move. Nathan and Keith got there first, each grabbing one of Bunny's arms and trying to haul him back.

"Stop!" Barnaby screramed at them. "Stop, stop, let me go! STOP IT!

"You have to stop hurting him, Handsome!" Nathan told him as gently as possible, trying to calm him down and coax him away. "He hurt you, I know, but we must turn him in…"

Barnaby continued to scream and struggle violently, eventually tossing Keith off his arm. Luckily for Keith, he wasn't actually tossed into anything. Before Kotetsu could reach and help Nathan, Barnaby was free and moving backwards.

He went as far as the chair in front of the control panel. He reached down and picked up one of those awful guns from the seat. He aimed it at Maverick and everyone froze.

Everyone except Kotetsu.

"Stop," Barnaby said again, but he was much quieter, pleading, as Kotetsu approached him.

The distress he saw in Barnaby's eyes hurt more than his body. Kotetsu wasn't sure if it was safe to be around him but he had to be. "Bunny, put that down. I told you a long time ago, I thought you agreed – you do not want to take someone's life."

Barnaby laughed and the sound made Kotetsu wince. "I don't want to take the life of another human. He is hardly human."

Kotetsu wanted to agree on that point, but regardless he needed to stop Barnaby. He kept going, in front of the gun. Barnaby wouldn't shoot him…he believed he wouldn't shoot him. "No, Bunny. It won't change anything that's happened."

"You're just repeating things you said months ago," Barnaby snapped, but still didn't fire.

Kotetsu stopped in front of the gun, and he couldn't reach past it well to touch Barnaby. He tentatively touched the tip of the gun, and began to lower it. "I'll repeat myself until I'm blue in the face," he said. Barnaby gave him an almost amused look and Kotetsu remembered he was still in his old, very blue suit. "Poor choice of words…" He kept pushing the gun lower, until it aimed firmly at the ground.

"Kotetsu," Barnmaby choked and looked down. "I hate him."

"I know," Kotetsu said, one hand on Barnaby's waist even if he couldn't feel it in his suit. Part of the glove on his free hand had ripped off and so he reached forward to stroke Barnaby's cheek, poking his fingers through the rips so he could feel his skin. "I know you hate him," he repeated. "You don't want to hate yourself as well."

Barnaby leaned into his touch, eyes fluttering closed for a second. "Would you be disappointed in me if I shot him?" he asked, voice barely above a whisper.

"I would, because you're better than that Bunny. I love you. You're not a killer, no one I love would be a killer," he said, fingers stroking his cheek a moment longer before he drew even closer and ran his fingers through Barnaby's messy hair. They had quite the audience for such an intimate moment. He didn't care.

Barnaby bowed his head slightly and stepped forward too. He had to bend at a slightly awkward angle but he did it anyway to just touch his head against Kotetsu's chest. "Everything hurts," he said.

"I know Bunny, know."

Barnaby swallowed and straightened back up slowly. "Kotetsu you're hurt. You need to go to a hospital."

"I do…sooner we turn him in, sooner I can go."

"But…"

"Please, Bunny…" Kotetsu cradled his face in his hands, drawing closer until their noses touched. "Please, let him rot out his life in a jail cell. Drop the gun, let's get him and go, please. I just want to take you out of here. I want to take you somewhere better…" He was babbling. His focus had held for a little while, but his thoughts began to feel muddled. Being slammed that last time in that room had not helped him.

"I…" Barnaby reached for Kotetsu's arm and gripped it tightly, though he didn't try to force him away. Instead he angled his face and kissed him.

Kotetsu relaxed, letting his strength flow into that kiss and closing his eyes. It did not last long, not as long as he would have liked but he was very much aware it wasn't the time and place for a makeout session, if only for the fact his daughter was watching.

"I love you," Barnaby whispered and stepped back. He dropped the gun and it clanked loudly on the floor. "Let's get out of here."

Kotetsu smiled at him and turned as they all faced Maverick.

"You're under arrest," Barnaby announced, his voice trembling as he walked forward.

Kotetsu trailed behind feeling as though he would fall down if he moved too fast. "You're going to jail Maverick, where you belong."

"Why?" Maverick asked.

Barnaby and Kotetsu stared at him, then at each other.

"Why?" Maverick repeated. "I've done this all for the city, all for NEXTs," he said, his voice sounding weak.

"Excuse me!" Nathan said, truly offended.

"Stern Bild was a run down city of filth and violence. It was not the Stern Bild you know now. NEXTs were hated." Maverick glared at them. "All I wanted to do was make it better for everyone. Heroes were accepted when they saved people, and people enjoyed watching them…."

"You're trying to make yourself look good. It's not working," Kotetsu snarled and then coughed. Shit, he didn't feel good.

"Of course not, because I had obstacles that tried to stop me. Like your parents." Barnaby tensed up and Maverick continued. "Some lives had to be sacfrificed for the good of everyone. I did that. I'm the only one who tried. I'm the only one who understood any of it!"

"Some sacrifices…like Barnaby's parents…Barnaby himself!" Kotetsu almost wanted to laugh. It was ridiculous. And yet…he knew Maverick believed the words, the opinions he spewed forth. It was disturbing.

"They got in my way."

"They were your best friends…you adopted me…and we were disposable because we got 'in your way'?" Barnaby said, almost yelling. "So you just killed, just like that!"

"It was never easy." Maverick sounded and looked like a sad, pathetic old man in that moment.

"What do you mean?" Barnaby asked.

"I couldn't do it myself. Ouroboros proved quite helpful, and…" Maverick fixed him with a sad smile. "I couldn't kill you."

Barnaby swallowed. Kotetsu was surprised himself, and a heavy silence descended over them. No, Maverick could never have genuinely cared for Barnaby…right? It was impossible for a monster like him…

"So you sent…your people to do it for you," Barnaby stated. When Maverick didn't respond quickly enough Barnaby fired off again, as if realizing his own words. "Your people…you're the leader of Ouroboros, aren't you?"

Maverick didn't answer again at first. But when he did, he turned away from them. "It doesn't matter if you take me away. Ouroboros is far too large to be stopped."

"What do you mean?" Kotetsu asked, trying to move forward but staggering. Barnaby caught him.

Maverick raised his hands to his head. "You'll find out, in time," he replied as he pressed his palms flat against the top of his head.

"What are you doing!" Barnaby cried, starting to move. He stopped since he stioll had Kotetsu.

It was Ivan and Edward who rushed toward Maverick to stop him. To stop him from…

They didn't get there in time. Maverick's hands twitched, there was a flash of bright light, and Kotetsu blacked out.

Kotetsu woke up shirtless in the back of an ambulance.

He vaguely wondered if he should panic, but mostly he felt tired and relieved on that stretcher. The last thing he wanted to do was wake up inside the Justice Tower again, worried for his daughter's life and Barnaby's. Fighting, risking his own life he could do, but not theirs. He wished the last few days hadn't happened, though it didn't really matter he supposed if it was over and the ones he cared about most were safe.

Neither of the two were around, he slowly realized, and that's when he felt a little scared. He saw blue lights that had to be from police cars. The back door of the ambulance was open and he heard voices. He also felt the cold again, though it wasn't quite that bad despite being half naked. He was covered with a blanket and it took the edge off. He wasn't sure he wanted it to, though, and with a groan he shoved it down and sat up.

Instantly Kaede appeared. "Dad!" she said, hurrying to the side of the bed.

"Kaede," he said fondly, smiling. His voice came out tired sounding, almost hoarse. If he didn't look worn out, he sounded it. He reached for her and she took his hand. "You're okay."

"I am. Are you…?" she asked, looking worried.

How was he doing? Kotetsu fell silent to actually take note of his condition. He was still in pain, but not as extreme as before. His head hurt, his chest hurt too. A lot of his injuries had been treated to an extent. He wondered if they didn't wrap him due to time or if the medics suspected he'd just heal himself. "I'm…I'm okay," he said, finally answering her question. "Is Bunny okay?" he asked, unable to hold off on that question.

"He's a little messed up." Kaede looked down.

"Messed up?" Kotetsu asked. He was worried but it seemed his body was too tired for him to feel sick from it.

"He's not cut or anything. But he's acting weird."

"Ah…" His memory. Kotetsu would have to be a fool to think Barnaby came out of that mentally sound. "I see." He didn't really know what else to say until he actually saw Barnaby. He hoped that would be soon.

Someone else stepped into the ambulance and Kotetsu looked up eagerly.

It was Ivan.

Kotetsu tried not to look too disappointed. Ivan had been a lot of help. If anything he needed to thank the kid. "Ivan…"

"Edward's gone," Ivan said. He looked miserable, Kotetsu realized.

"Gone?"

"He took off since the police are here. He's still an escaped criminal," Ivan said with a sigh, looking around the ambulance.

"Oh." Well, that wasn't the end of the world. "You two will find each other when the police clear out. You know this," he assured Ivan. He also said it honestly. Edward was probably back at his 'home' or lurking somewhere watching everyone. "Ivan, what happened?"

Ivan didn't answer at first, likely discontent with Kotetsu's far too casual answer. But he did reply. "Maverick's been taken away. He's still alive, but he did something to his head…he's like a human vegetable."

A terrible fate. And yet, Kotetsu couldn't find it in him to be sad. Maverick deserved the misery for what he'd done to Barnaby. At the same time Kotetsu felt awful for thinking that. "I see…"

"The rest of us are okay, and right now they're getting the cameras from the top of the tower. There were a bunch in these creepy rooms with spikes, I don't know what was planned…" Ivan shuddered.

So did Kotetsu for that matter, and Kaede's hand moved to his shoulder. He smiled at her before continuing with Ivan. "So now everyone will learn the truth. I assume…well, hope…my name is cleared?"

Ivan nodded.

That was a huge weight off his shoulders. "Then, I think I only have another question for now," Kotetsu said. When his head felt better, he'd have hundreds. Although whether or not he'd actually ask them was another thing entirely. "How come those…things didn't shoot us?"

"You'll have to thank your mechanic for that. He was fascinated by those android things, and apparently he was familiar with work that Barnaby's parents did," Ivan told him.

"The creepy little guy with the glasses?" Kotetsu asked, surprised. He talked to him only when he really needed to. He felt confident the little bald guy had one or several people locked in his basement. "For real?" Maybe he had been completely wrong.

"He showed up in the Apollon transport. He wanted to get you your current suit, I guess he was offended you weren't wearing it."

Kaede giggled very briefly while Kotetsu stared at Ivan. He was sure there was more to it than being offended, but he'd take it. "So he knew how to turn them off?"

"He used a built in safety mode," Ivan answered.

"Safety mode…" Kotetsu let out a long sigh of relief, content with that answer. He was sure he wouldn't understand it if Ivan explained further. It didn't matter. It was over. The entire scary mess was over.

Almost.

The physical wounds would heal, but the mental ones… "Could you two bring me Bunny?"

Kaede nodded and headed over to Ivan, who hesitated. "He's being asked quite a few questions…I'll try," he decided. He startled slightly when Kaede decided to take his hand but still left the ambulance with her.

Luckily, Kotetsu didn't have to wait long. He stared at his own hands for maybe a minute before someone else entered the ambulance, and he didn't have to look up to know it was Barnaby. Of course, he smiled and looked up anyway. Barnaby was in his undersuit and wearing his glasses, which would have been sexy as hell but his face was cold and blank. It scared him. "Bunny…"

"I'm sorry, Kotetsu."

"For what?" Kotetsu asked, honestly puzzled in that second.

"I hurt you. I know I attacked you," he said, looking down.

Ah yes, that. "You didn't mean to. I know you didn't mean to."

Barnaby shook his head. "You forgive too easily, old man. I did something horrible."

"No, you almost did something horrible. Then you stopped."

"Only because you talked me out of it. You know that's not what I meant anyway."

Kotetsu sighed, irritated. He held out his hand. "Come here and stop this nonsense. You know I'd forgive you a thousand times over."

"And that worries me," Barnaby said, walking up closer but not taking Kotetsu's hand.

"Why?" Kotetsu asked, blinking. When Barnaby didn't answer, Kotetsu sighed. "This is stupid."

"Stupid?" Barnaby repeated, his voice angry. "This is just _stupid_to you? That's an understatement. Kotetsu do you understand what happened?"

"Uh, yes?"

"No you don't. You know your memories are sound and you're sure of what's around you. I'm worried I might hurt you again, like I did up there, and you just write it off? Kotetsu do you have any idea of how much farther this goes than stupid? What if next time I attack you badly enough to kill you?" he said, eyes flashing anger. "This is something I can't just dismiss! It haunts me, no matter what you say!"

Kotetsu swallowed, and pressed his hand to his forehead. It hurt. "Bunny, you only attacked me up there after seeing Maverick."

"So? Maybe something else will trigger it, and then what!"

"Listen, listen. I know your head is messed up right now. A lot needs to be done, more help than I can give you, but Bunny? I refuse to let you go through it alone. This is what part…er…lovers do for each other. And I honestly don't think you'll attack me again."

"But what if you're wrong?" Barnaby's gaze had softened just a tiny bit.

"Then I'm wrong! But I don't care! You're worth it!" He growled then. "You'd do the same for me, and don't even deny it. Hell, you _have_been doing the same!"

"You haven't hurt me," Barnaby said, his voice shaking as he lost his composure rapidly.

"I could have, emotionally. And whatever, everything has been about me and my stupid issues. If you can deal with that stress, I can deal with some accidental swings to the face!"

"There you go with that word again. Your issues aren't stupid. They never have been."

"Why?"

"Because how you feel is important, and if you're sad that's not stupid. It's sad."

"You say how I feel is important? Then please, don't run away because of guilt. I love you, Barnaby, I can't imagine life without you. I don't want to lose you. And…part of that is forgiving you for something that wasn't even your fault. This is how I feel."

"I…" Barnaby stepped forward enough to take the hand Kotetsu still offered. He let out a defeated sigh. "I understand."

Kotetsu squeezed his hand. "You know I'll help you get through this. Just as you've been here supporting me, I will support you."

"But you're not…um…better."

"I know." Kotetsu brought Barnaby's hand to his cheek, closing his eyes at the contact. "I'll get there, and so will you. It'll be work. But it's not as though we'll be miserable the whole time."

"No, I suppose not."

"You suppose…look at you!" Kotetsu laughed a little and tugged at Barnaby's arm. Sure, he himself was stressed out, worried, and all of that. He didn't know when he would slip back into his persistent sadness and if he would be of any use to Barnaby…but at the same time he felt strangely confident. Nothing would tear him away from Barnaby save death. He loved him too much.

Getting the hint, Barnaby leaned down and kissed him, briefly on the lips and then on the cheek. "You don't think," he muttered, face pressed close to Kotetsu's. "I love you regardless,and I wonder what that says about me."

"Heeey…" Kotetsu leaned back only to see a tiny smile on Barnaby's face. "OH. Taking a shot at me huh?"

"You just realize that?"

Kotetsu laughed and ruffled Barnaby's hair, much to his complaints.

They didn't get much longer before the blue lights outside began to die out, cops leaving the scene. The paramedics returned, along with Kaede. And try as they might, the poor medics couldn't get rid of Kaede and Barnaby – so they stayed along for the ride. Kotetsu would have liked to see his friends, he would have _loved_to have been conscious when everyone got down from the tower initially, but he had plenty of time. He felt amazingly okay too, despite being off his medication and everything that he'd been through.

He really hoped that feeling would stick around.


	13. If I could make you mine

Lunatic fried Maverick.

In the days after the news report, Kotetsu blamed himself a little. Had he been awake he could have stopped it, he thought. Barnaby silenced that thought pretty fast. Kotetsu couldn't help being injured, and Barnaby made it very clear that it was likely Lunatic would have killed Maverick at some point anyway – Kotetsu couldn't be around him constantly to protect him.

Nor did he want to be.

"Three…two…one…HAPPY NEW YEAR!" voices shouted excitedly from the television, and Kotetsu clinked glasses with Barnaby. A blanket covered their laps, the lights down low and in front of them an absolute mess – the results of eating and making out for hours in front of the television.

The days immediately after their whole ordeal were frantic and stressful. There had been interviews upon interviews, statements, footage reviews, and of course, uncertainty for HeroTV. Things looked pretty bad for the program when Agnes began to give interviews, confused about absolutely everything. No doubt her memories had been changed too, and no one had been able to directly repair them.

Nathan, Antonio, Ivan and the rest – they all said they were fine. They would continue to help the citizens of Stern Bild regardless even if it would be sad to see the show come to an end.

Luckily it didn't come to that. Agnes's memory did come back, right with her bossy attitude and she took over. No one had to worry. In fact, things had wrapped up pretty nicely. The city was safe, HeroTV was safe, and most of Kotetsu's questions had been answered, except for one. He still wondered why the criminals had let Kaede go. Someone mentioned a possibility of a 'persuasion' ability carried by one of Maverick's henchmen, which was interesting but in the end Kotetsu decided it didn't matter because she was safe.

And Barnaby was, well, he was okay. He was confused often enough, or sad, but he was safe and had no more violent outbursts towards Kotetsu. They had yet to set him up with professional help with everything going on, but Kotetsu knew they could afford to take a break from everything.

Well, they'd get around to it. Kotetsu shifted where he sat on the couch with Barnaby, moving closer to him and leaning his head on his shoulder as they watched the celebrations on the TV. It looked exciting, but Kotetsu was good where he was- far from the city, in Oriental Town, in his family's house all alone except for Barnaby. Kaede had wanted to see New Years in Stern Bild so Kotetsu offered his mother, brother and Kaede a switch for a couple of nights – they could stay at his apartment, and he could stay at the house with Barnaby.

Kotetsu had worried slightly that Barnaby wouldn't want to be somewhere boring on New Year's, since there were celebrations, fireworks, and exciting parties back in the city. Nathan had invited everyone to a large celebration. Kotetsu appreciated the invite, but more than anything he wanted private time with Barnaby. And he wanted to be somewhere that wouldn't have him constantly nervous, which meant his hometown.

When he relayed the idea, Barnaby actually looked grateful.

"Guess it's a new year now," Barnaby said softly.

"Mmmhmm. What do you plan to do with it?"

"I don't know…" There had been talks between them both about retiring, since Kotetsu's powers left him unsure and Barnaby wanted to find out who the hell he was.

"Well, guess you don't have to decide right now."

"How do you feel?" Barnaby asked, shrugging Kotetsu off his shoulder briefly before setting down his glass and putting an arm around him.

"Hopeful, scared…happy." Hard to pinpoint with his moods trying to go back to normal. But he was pretty sure what he felt there with Barnaby was pure happiness. "You?"

"Loved," Barnaby replied and Kotetsu blushed a little.

"Not…lonely, right?"

"A little bit. Samantha is gone, and Maverick…" He didn't finish it. "I can't really help it."

"That's okay." Kotetsu understood. "Just as long as you still always feel loved."

"You say such sappy things," Barnaby mock-scolded him. "I thought you wanted to be cool!"

"I am totally cool!"

"You and your beard are really, really lame."

"Your boots are way too red."

"How can something be too red!" Barnaby asked loudly, and paused. He then broke into laughter.

Kotetsu joined him in his laughter and stood up. "Come on Bunny. Let's go to bed."

"Huh?" Barnaby stared. "But it just turned midnight. Shouldn't we stay awake longer to celebrate it?"

"Who said we were going to sleep?" Kotetsu grinned down at him.

"…!" That got Barnaby to his feet in a hurry, nearly tripping over himself as Kotetsu caught him.

"Wow," Kotetsu shook his head and laughed more. "Can't tell if you're really eager or just tipsy."

"Both? But Kotetsu, you still…" Barnaby cut his sentence off, a hand rested flat against Kotetsu's chest.

Kotetsu's injuries had healed with the aid of his power and plain old medicine, but he still had aches and his chest still hurt sometimes even if his ribs had healed. "I'm fine," he assured Barnaby. "More than fine," he added, cupping Barnaby's face and kissing him.

Barnaby sighed and nodded when Kotetsu dropped one hand, the other curling around to the back of Barnaby's head as he nuzzled him affectionately. "Maybe I'll retire and we can just do this all day," Barnaby joked.

"Not a bad idea," Kotetsu mused. He could go for that. He could go for spending his entire life like that with Barnaby, but that was a conversation for another time.

"It's a terrible idea," Barnaby said, his hands on Kotetsu's waist as they continued to stand there, unmoving. "Promise me that whatever you do, retire or not, you'll do it for you. Not for me."

"You know I can't completely promise that. If you retire, we have no more team. I don't mind being on my own as a hero, but it'll still be horribly empty without you. I need you." He had promised Tomoe he'd always be a hero, and he meant that – if not on tv, then for the ones that he loved. She would approve. He threaded his fingers through Barnaby's hair and wrapped his other arm around him.

"Then, expect me to do the same," Barnaby said, drawing Kotetsu's body closer to his.

"I guess that would be fair, huh?" Kotetsu didn't want Barnaby to retire for him either, but he already knew he would. It didn't bother him. That was even if they retired. "As long as you're sure…doing something like that for me…don't follow me anywhere you don't want to."

Barnaby kissed him and held him tight. He looked into Kotetsu's eyes, his gaze soft, loving. He looked at him for a while, moving only to touch Kotetsu's hair. The only sound in the room was the television, playing dance music and the occasional happy screams from party goers. Kotetsu ignored them, his focus on Barnaby's eyes and touch. Just when Kotetsu thought he should say or do something, Barnaby spoke.

"I'll go wherever you will go."

.

.

_And there's the end! I didn't really plan on splitting this story into chapters, as it was written for T&B Anon. So...I used the lyrics from "Where Ever You Will Go" by the Calling. Prob obvious haha. Hope readers enjoyed this!_


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